Gender Frustration.

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I'm getting really confused over how gender works and is separate to the physical body.

Can gender be split, or hashed together to make something unique (Note, not normal) or is it possible that the gender can be split over topics or areas of the brain?

You see, I'm a guy physically, who likes Cars, Sports, DIY, Women etc...
Except, mentally, I'm totally female - this list is almost 100% identical:
http://www.help4aspergers.com/pb/wp_a58 ... 83e339.JPG

Does this mean I'm a guy with a female brain, or what?
It doesn't make sense.
I know I'm short on details here, but I just want to throw this out there for some answers, please?

Well, most of the things on that list are not specific to being a female autistic. I don't know why it is titled the way that it is. I am male and also fit most of it.

As far as non-gender specific things on that list, IMO:

I.e.
"stims to soothe when sad or agitated; rocking, face-rubbing,..."
"anxiety and hear are predominant emotions"
"may have difficulty holding on to a job"
"often prefers the company of animals"
"may have androgynous traits"
"highly intelligent, yet sometimes can be slow to comprehend..."
"percieved to be cold-natured and self-centered"
"May be highly educated, but will have had to struggle with social aspects of college"

Admittedly there are some that do make a gender comparison, "usually a little more expressive than male counterparts," but those items seem to make up less than half of the list.

Don't worry about that list. There are some minor gender specific items, but the list is essentially about how Aspie girls are different than NT girls, and not so much about how Aspie girls differ from Aspie boys. Such a list would be little different from how NT boys and NT girls differ (certainly, for the most part.)

I would say though, that if you are heavily concerned with appearance (design and fashion), outwardly expressive, and more socially intuitive than other Aspies at your point on the spectrum relative to other symptoms, then you might consider yourself to be effeminate.

For some people gender is a less of an issue, and it only minimally affects their identity, while for others it is a defining trait. I don't take gender from a cultural standpoint too seriously, but depending on your level of sex hormones a larger or smaller area of the brain will behave in ways stereotypical of one gender or the other. I'm not sure any level of hormones will 100% guarantee these differences though.

I am a man and I probably relate better to men in most areas of life, but sometimes I will be shocked (like other people having the same experience) how much better I can relate to the other gender when it comes to certain issues.

I don't consider myself effeminate, but I find it strange that I find chores and other traits easier, almost enjoyable (In certain situations) that NT guys & some NT girls wouldn't. For instance, I don't mind going shopping with company - I mean going through a store for a half an hour only to return two hours later to buy that item we talked about at for ten minutes. Or worse yet, cleaning at midnight, or trying to even begin understanding fashion, colognes, etc.

That's only the chores, traits completely baffle me as to why I have them; the one most confusing is my almost opposite traits on Alexithymia - I know what I'm feeling but I can't communicate it correctly or at all.