Married? How did you propose?

Post Reply New Topic

After a rather short romance, my wife-to-be became pregnant. By way of a proposal I suggested as follows:

"I think we should get married so that you can go on my medical insurance."

I have never lived that one down. Nevertheless, here we are married for 16 years and with three kids.

I was wondering how other AS people handled the matter of marriage proposal considering that it is meant to be a deeply emotional event and we AS sorts are not particularly good at emotions?

Not yet for me...... but I have a good plan for what I will do. I will not spoil it, however.

_________________
LIONS-STAMPEDERS-ELKS-ROUGHRIDERS-BLUE BOMBERS-TIGER-CATS-ARGONAUTS-REDBLACKS-ALOUETTES

The Canadian Football League - What We're Made Of

Feel free to talk to me, if you wish.

Every day is a gift- cherish it!

"A true, true friend helps a friend in need."

Of course. You really should make it something special. I look back now and think how stupefyingly inadequate I was about such things. Still aminadequate mostly but have improved I think.

I've been in limbo with my gf for a long time it seems. I proposed a long time ago and gave her a ring and everything but now she says that she doesn't believe in marriage. This gets me upset because it's something that I really care about and want to do. She says it's about money but I know it's not now.
She wants to get married but to a girl.

To answer your question. She pretty much was like get me a ring. I also almost never asked her out. We have been talking for a few weeks but I couldn't gather up the courage to ask her out so she pretty much was like I have a question one time when we were talking and that made me ask her.

I turned around and said, I think we should get married (after living together for 2 years).

2 years later we are getting divorced

I thought I did it right... I brought her to the same spot we had our first date, sat her at the same bench and proposed.

...she said I wasn't doing it right because I wasn't on one knee. (Although she did whisper a "yes".)

...then followed about 11 years of being wrong at almost every turn...

To my first wife, I just rolled over one morning before breakfast and asked her if she wanted to get married.

It was after a medical scare. My then boyfriend had a sort of food poisoning episode where he ended up in the hospital. I was afraid that they wouldn't let me in to see him while he was in the ER (I had ridden in the ambulance with him.) So I said he was my fiance. When he was discharged, we were back home and sitting up late and talking. I mentioned that I had said that he was my fiance in order to be allowed into his hospital room, and shyly asked how he felt about me saying that. He said that he thought it was cute, even flattering. Then I asked how he felt about marriage. Because I had been afraid of losing him to that awful food poisoning incident, I realized how much he meant to me. He then proposed to me, and admitted that he had been wanting to ask me for the past six months, but thought that I might not want to.

I took her down on the San Antonio Riverwalk. It was about 10 at night. I found a nice quiet place under a light. I had given her an angel hair quartz ring several weeks prior. I told her that I thought that ring looked really good...but I'd like you to wear this one (turning over my hand to reveal engagement ring)

She said she was glad I didn't go down on one knee, because she said we should be equals in life and not put either one of us above the other

My wife and I share a passion for fishing. It is one of the things that broke the ice for us.

One day we were fishing our favorite fishing spot in the Colorado mountains. She had just landed a big, fat Rainbow trout about 17" long (a nice catch at 9,000 ft) and I had just finished my cigar. The time was right so I kicked my float tube up next to hers and popped the question. First, I stated that "the real one is in the truck" (she had no idea I was talking about a ring), then I proposed to her over 150 ft of water using a cigar band as a ring.

Of course, once she figured out that the real ring was in the truck, fishing was over for the day and we kicked our way back to the bank so she could go put it on. I didn't mind. She landed dinner. I landed my better half.

Fishing may not sound romantic for everyone but that made our proposal unique. I think a proposal should have to do with who you are as a couple. This suited us and we still go fishing together in that same lake after seven years of marriage.

After ten years together and going to London, Milan, Paris, Venice for romantic breaks all without any sign of a proposal, she had pretty much given up on the possibility.

I took her for a surprise birthday break in Bath (she is crazy about Jane Austen) with a stay at a posh hotel and proposed in the beautiful estate grounds of a big country house on this big romantic bridge on the sunday morning. There was a light covering of snow and we had the entire grounds to ourselves. I think it must have worked as she said yes and we married a year later.

My ex husband proposed during a party at a hotel ballroom. We were on a fun trip to Turkey for employees and spouses. I had gone to the toilet and when I came back, there he was outside the ballroom, with one of the roses that were on the tables as central arrangements. He handed it to me shyly and proposed (no ring then, or ever). I said I had to think about it. Then he told his friend, who worked in the same company, and she told everyone, so it was announced on stage. So since then I had my colleagues pressuring me to say yes for weeks.

Needless to say, I divorced him in less than a year.

Sorry, I only now realize this thread is about how AS men have proposed, and my ex is an NT. So please disregard my above post.

No trouble with your post on the matter Moondust. It woud be interesting how an aspie person responds to being proposed to in an emotionally charged way? If it were me I am sure I would be quite shattered by the experience. While it is a great moment in life, it must be quite an axhausting emotional experience. On the other hand, its generally between two people who now each other well (no crowds) so maybe being proposed to isn't exhausting at all? One of those, "I'll just stand up in front of this whole crowd here and publicly propose to my aspie partner" could be really intimidating.