"Grow up"

Post Reply New Topic

Im 23 and I feel much the same as I did when I was 12. When my peers were learning to drink,drive and date (often at the same time) I was still immersed in my own inner worlds struggling to comprehend the shifting tides. I doubt that i'll ever truly "grow up". I was unsure which forum to post this in but this one seemed most appropriate for obvious reasons.

How have you guys dealt with growing older - do you FEEL older mentally and emotionally. At what point would you say your consciousness is at (20 21 or younger etc)

At 59 I'm told that I am old.

However, my mind seemed to stop around mid-20s and I guess my emotional nature is around the same place. I have no 'resonance' with people my age and my few friends are all 10+ years younger than me.

My husband (whom is now deceased after commuting suicide in 2011) must have struggled with this same issue. At 26, he was a little of both adult and child as he had become what I refer to as a "functioning alcoholic" yet, in his free time only wanted to drink and play his video games. He had a very hard time not letting the negative thoughts out in his mind by others become almost reality to him. It was a very difficult thing to walk away from the one and ONLY man I've ever truly loved but, to preserve my and my children's safety, I had little choice. I only regret not know that he had Aspergers or enough about Aspergers that I could help him (if it even would have been possible to do so). Our 7 year old daughter now has Aspergers and I try my best to do for her what no one ever could/would do for my husband.

Sending prayers and positive thoughts your way to help you learn how to function in a world that must seem so off and doreign to you! I don't think Aspergers or any form of Autism needs a "cure" per se but, how wonderful it would be if there were some way to help adults function in their day to day life. Something most of us NTs take for granted every day.

I'm still young. It can be a bit embarrassing for me, so I keep myself to myself.

I hate it when people comment on it, because I try really hard to be like an adult.

At 52, I still can't quite believe I'm "supposed to be" "middle aged." I don't relate to that at all! I feel eternally young inside. I kind of feel all kind of ages; my consciousness can be anything at different times -- 8, 14, 19, 20. I'm still in touch with being a child. I'm still in touch with being a teenager. and so forth. I still feel any of my younger ages, inside myself. I still listen to Radiohead, collect stuffed toys, and throughout my life the people who have become friends at all have always been much younger than me. When I was 32 my best friend was a 22 year old skate punk into Skinny Puppy.

Part of that is because I've always looked at least ten years younger all the way along, so potential friends who are drawn to me think I'm their age. Of course I tell them my age but even then, it hasn't put anyone off because I still act like them anyway. Other people have always been shocked to learn my real age -- that even happened again just last week! I just kind of have always retained a younger vibe/look/set of mannerisms. I was still carded at 40.

At the same time, I've done all the usual markers of maturity -- work, filing taxes on time, paying bills on time, I've married (and divorced), taken care of minor household repairs, been a responsible person. In all the practical senses I've "grown up" because I can't stand insecurity, instability, etc. So I'm responsible and stable in all the important ways that keep a roof over one's head. But my personality is very young and someone could very easily want to say "Grow up!" to me, yes.

.

At 31, I feel like I'm in my early twenties, but recognize how different I am from when I was that age. I've always felt "emotionally younger" than most of my peers. Maturity comes, but personally, I enjoy the ability to stay young at heart.

Well, I´m 60, but I feel like in my thirties.
My late brother had studied the phenomena and claimed, that we (humans) actually stay in our thirties, - mentally.
I have decided to ignore my birth certificate. It only represents some figures.
We are exactly as old as we function!, - so I am full of ideas for my future.

The older I get, the less I hear it. I don't think it's progressive maturity either, but recognition of my permanent state.

"Growing old is mandatory, Growing up is optional"

I've never felt my own age. I feel that my mind is a compromise between a six year old child and a gray haired professor

I'm 32 and live alone far away from any family. I struggle with this. I guess I'm successful, but I feel like I'm scraping by with my maturity and being responsible. I haven't burned down my apartment yet, nor wrecked any cars, although I have come close a few times. I associate with a range of ages. I always feel immature.

I feel way older than people my age. They would probably say that I am immature because I don't think like they do.

One mark of maturity, I do not have. That is the ability to be responsible for a million things at once. I can't, and I won't put myself in that position, so I can't relate to the social trappings of adulthood (having your own place, having a long-term relationship, being a parent, sex issues). I don't think I will ever relate to that stuff. Even if I do get those things, I won't view them the same way that normal people do. I have a feeling that I will relate more to my kids than my wife if I get married and have kids. It's always this way when I date. I fall in love with the kids, can take or leave the gf. Kids know what's important. Adults get distracted.

I still feel like I'm in high school while at college a decent amount of the time. This has some pretty bad consequences as you could guess. For "acting my age", I don't really know how you would classify me at the moment because I spend a large percentage of my time viewing media or online. I've pretty much acted how I do today for the past 5 years or so. As you can tell from this, I don't like change.