The single, over 40 thread

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Since we have a "Married aspies" cafe, I thought it'd be nice to hear from those of us who are over 40 and single. I'd love it if people could share here what you do with your life, what your social life is like, your goals, dreams, whatever you feel like sharing (or asking other singles over 40)`

LOL, 'social life' - I remember that. Do they still make those? The closest thing I have left to a social life is exchanging pleasantries with the service desk clerks at WalMart when I buy the money orders to pay my bills.

After being discriminated against and left legally unable to work by the apathy of State bureaucrats, my only remaining goal was to finish my first novel and get published, but now that it's done, I find I'm trapped by the system - if I published and made any money, I could be fiscally penalized and left homeless. Story of my life.

I've gone back to college, and I'm taking 18 hours of challenging courses, so I have no social life to speak of. I joined the honor society for transfer students, and we plan to do some volunteer work soon. I expect to continue getting degrees until I'm about 50, and I hope I can still find a good job as an economist at that time!

My social life is zero. Zip. Nada. Nein. Non-existent. Nil. I go no where (except to the occasional food bank and doctor's visit) and I have no friends. I even hate shopping at the supermarket but I have to.

I've become much more reclusive and avoidant as I've aged. I was recently diagnosed with depression and anxiety by the state's DSHS psychiatrist so now I'm eligible for disability benefits.

I stopped doing drugs two years ago but still drink the occasional beer. Although I'm not into sports, I do watch the odd Seahawks game.

If I wasn't so depressed, I'd be head first into my special interests which include writing fiction and composing music on my computer.

I do like first person shooters and hidden object games but haven't been playing lately because of the depression.

Right now, I'm in a limbo phase. Technically, I can be homeless in a month. Hopefully, the disability program will come through rent-wise.

^^^

I am a hermit in my hermithole in the woods. me, myself and I share a tin can amongst the smogberry trees out in rural Washington state. we have sparkling conversations and the odd argument.

I'm a socialite among the stray cats of the neighborhood... My social life with humans is nowadays reduced to exchanging pleasantries with neighbors and co-workers.

What I do mostly is assiduously avoid people, a lot like what redrobin62 said, while doing my best to balance not losing it while finishing raising my offspring, having no social life, having goals of finishing my portfolio and being represented by at least one gallery, staying as healthy and strong as I can through good food ( most of the time I love cooking), laughing at random hilarious things, escaping the reach of the black hole of doom-depression, walking and riding my bike which is at the moment stationary, dreaming about impossible wants, moving away from where I currently live, and wondering/marveling about many things. Reading a lot, drawing and painting of course when I am able, and always trying to figure out what this (life) is all about. And I have two cats.

Last edited by alpineglow on 29 Oct 2013, 9:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I meet people occasionally, that's social life, right?

I'd like to have someone close though, someone who enjoys doing similar things and talking about similar topics in a similar way.

Er. I mean I did just go to cinema with a friend and we giggled before during and after but it's not Quite what I meant.

IDK, I am getting used to being myself and not worrying about my age although I'm surrounded by very young people at work which sometimes freaks me out because I forget that I am almost twice their age etc. so can't really be friends with them. Or date them. heh

I wouldn't have a problem with dating someone half my age. I would have a problem dating anyone right now, though. Either my relationship or my GPA would suffer, and I don't want to try to do both and end up hurting both. If someone interesting pursued me, I might manage to set proper limits, but I just don't like the idea. Spending time with the cute young women in the honor society suffices to keep my conversational skills from getting too rusty.

Aspie support groups and sometimes a neighbor might say Hi when I take my daily walk is my social life outside of Wrong Planet.

Last edited by ASPartOfMe on 30 Oct 2013, 11:53 am, edited 1 time in total.

I got injured at work about a decade ago, and my health has been failing since. A couple of years after I became disabled my wife left and I've been raising my 5 kids since. I've been diagnosed with depression and anxiety since the injury, as well as a list of other things. Most of you are probably aware of the scenario. My eldest is 20 now and she helps me with running errands. I rarely leave the house. I don't really associate with anyone but my kids. Having the kids has helped me keep going.

I have a motto:-

"Life ends at 35"

I have found such to be a more realistic statement than the "Life begins at 40" nonsense.

life begins in heaven.

Dont you mean this?:-

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tJiWzZqvL0[/youtube]

^^^
sorry, but that one went WAY over my head. will you please tell me what you mean?

Couldn't resist the opportunity to post my favourite song when you mentioned life beginning in Heaven.