Learned yesterday I'm AS 31 years old

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Hi guys. I don't know what to do or who to talk to. I feel like it's an earth shattering revelation but no one seems surprised, or even concerned. My girlfriend of a year is the least supportive. No one questions it... But I need to talk to someone. Like on the phone. Or in person. This typing is such an inefficient method of conveying variables, context, or anything else for that matter beside root information.

I've just been so weird and dislike my whole life. Everyone calls me arrogant but I have no confidence and nothing but love for others... I can't even begin to list all the things I've read on this forum that I identify with...

Are we actually smarter? Everyone in the world just seems so dull and animalistic...

To be entirely forthcoming, I've always known that any executive tasks cause me extreme anxiety. I can't even look at job applications. Or taxes. Or the calendar. I'm afraid without help I may be remanded indefinitely to a life in semblance of laziness.

i became official at age 31, too! but not as an Aspie...they said I was HFA. i just consider myself on the spectrum. HFA makes it seem like i'm HIGH MAINTENANCE. LOL

Welcome MclaudeW - I was diagnosed late, at 58, and hadn't a clue I might be ASD until my mid fifties. In my case my diagnosis was a relief.

Here's offering you what support I can from afar.

I am much much more cerebral than most around me, and was often thought to be arrogant when I was younger.

I was 35 when I was diagnosed. I was in counseling during a third episode of major depression (along with panic attacks and PTSD) when my counselor explained to me what Asperger's is and how it ties in with my ongoing issues with depression and anxiety. She and my family doctor helped me get both coping strategies as well as medication to help me deal with my depression and anxiety, and to better navigate in the world.

I was accused of arrogance and aloofness ever since I can remember. There are things I just don't get. I can be perceived as harsh or emotionally flat when the reality is I am very poor at both sending and receiving body language, and I'm really awkward with eye contact. I take things very literally and don't always get subtle nuances.

I'm also hyperlexic, so I had a very broad vocabulary at an early age. I did very well academically, but I was tortured and tormented by other kids beginning with my own sisters as I had poor vision and coordination deficits and was an easy victim. I always knew there was something "wrong" with me but I never had an explanation. It was helpful even at age 35 to learn that what is "wrong" with me has a name and while it's not "curable," it is navigable.

There is good life to be had even when you are living with an ASD. Some things are more challenging when you have an ASD, but it's OK to look for answers and to get help when you need it.

The arrogance just faded, or maybe I relaxed a bit about allowing myself to be a clown - dunno, my feelings became softened with age.

People don't seem to think I'm arrogant now (but I don't see many people, only a few brainy ones) - I feel pretty much the same feelings, though not as strongly, and could be better at masking those feelings. Can pass as NT for about an hour, if I can smoke.

Don't feel superior to other people. Self assessment is one of my blind spots

I don't know what type of support groups there are in your area. Most of them are for kids and parents. But if there is a group for adults in your area it might be worth your time to attend.

There are some good Aspergers/Autistic v-loggers that are on You tube
The-An-Mish
I would recommend starting with her oldest videos first.

Ask an Autistic
I would recommend the videos with "What is" in the titles to start.

Dr. Tony Attwood's book "The Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome". He has a website and plenty of videos.

Many of us are "visual thinkers" so these videos might be a better way of learning then the written word.

It was an earth shattering revelation to me, kind of a second birthday when I was diagnosed at age 55 followed by a whole series of revelations and emotions. You should let your Aspergers brain process this information the way it needs to, not try to bottle it up, or judge it.

Welcome to Wrong Planet

Well, I am certainly a visual thinker. I scored genius on all the spatial and visual sections of the iq test. I can hold 42 numbers changing in my head by visualizing them. The tester actually said "Holy s**t" under her breath after that test haha.

Just one more thing to identify with I guess.

I thought AS was "autistic spectrum?" I don't know where I sit exactly. The neoropshycologist was doing a screening for DARS before I got the govt to pay for my hernia repair surgery. He told me in plain English he would edit my results but that I had a clear developmental learning disorder. I don't think he wanted me to know. But I did research and what I found is a wrong planet that is right for me on every level. I had speech therapy as a child, chewed on my hands, advanced hyperlexia, misdiagnosed as ADHD at one point...

What Elysian has said above could be a snap shot of my life. I'm no psychologist, but perhaps the appearance of arrogance and aloofness is a defense thing - it's safer than looking scared and vulnerable. At one point as a teenager my doctor thought I was on my way to becoming a schizophrenic, that coupled with a drastic phobia of psychiatry kept me a free range undiagnosed aspie for fifty years.

From Elysian1969 "I was accused of arrogance and aloofness ever since I can remember. There are things I just don't get. I can be perceived as harsh or emotionally flat when the reality is I am very poor at both sending and receiving body language, and I'm really awkward with eye contact. I take things very literally and don't always get subtle nuances.

I'm also hyperlexic, so I had a very broad vocabulary at an early age. I did very well academically, but I was tortured and tormented by other kids . . .

Thank you providing clarification.