Regaining A Routine

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Hello!
I'm in my 40s, and find that my routine has broken down, and I just seem to drift, not getting anything done, and becoming very anxious.

I was at boarding school until the age of 16. While it was very pleasant there, there was a fixed timetable for the day: 7.30am - get up; 8am - breakfast; 8.45 - school begins, etc. Also for the week: Tuesday and Thursdays, clean linens; every other Wednesday - clean towels, etc. While it sounds pretty regimented, the advantage was that it freed you from having to work out what you were going to do at certain times of the day, and also there was a great deal of predictability about everything.

Yes, I realise life isn't like that, but since leaving school over 25 years ago, I have done nothing but drift. Occasionally I try to impose a routine on myself: have a morning routine for example, but somehow it just feels false and I end up just drifting again.

Do you have a fixed or semi-fixed routine? How do you cope when you find yourself just drifting and not able to do anything? Any comments would be very interesting.

My suggestion is to use a smartphone or software on your computer to notify you of the points in your schedule through the day.

Also, form up interests and enterprises of all kinds into projects with structure. That means describing in writing what the project is intended to achieve and roughing out a timeline for achieving those goals. To make things work you then need to identify milestones or intermediate targets needed to complete the overall project goal, and specific next actions to take.

It maybe that you get stuck because you don't know what to do next. The next action in this case is: find out from the web or a person what do next.

Once you have a list of things to do and specific times in which to do it and maintaining these lists and schedules is part of the routine you impose on yourself, it will be easier not to just drift.

Good luck.

Thank you, very sound ideas. I'll definitely spend some time mapping out some of my interests and forming projects.

I suppose the only thing to think about is what to do when life gets in the way and throws off the timetable, but then however well planned things are, there's always something that comes up!

I think the thing to do there is to recognize that life gets in the way and plan for it.

Pilots flying jets into big airports have published details of several "missed approach" options to follow if they have to abort a landing. They don't just give up and stop flying. They report the missed approach and then follow the published instruction to get to a certain course, altitude and configuration--then, when they are out of harm's way, they can decide to make another attempt or, if that would be unsafe, divert to a different airport.

In much the same way, you can have a standard procedure for noting that you are going off schedule and a standard way to get back on. E.G.: off schedule in the morning, get back on with the first event after lunch. If that isn't possible, go with postponing today's schedule until tomorrow.

Good luck!

I have to schedule and block out my day or I spend too much time trying to figure out what to do or just don't do anything useful and sort of drift.

I already have a need to list and categorize thing so I keep multi-topic to do lists. I try to keep a rough schedule for my day at a minimum and also list tasks that have to be done a certain day.

Right now I use Evernote to keep to do lists and schedules. Google Calendar is also helpful. There are many different phone apps or other methods depending on what works for you.

Having something totally derail your schedule happens. Usually doubling my effort to schedule and list things helps get back on track.

I have a magnetic whiteboard calendar on the wall. I just used a magnet to pin a big list with 6 key goals for today to it.

As I finish each thing, I'll cross it off and note the time it took.

Things that aren't for today that I learn about today can go on the calendar or the equivalent in Google calendar.