Neglect or Aspie

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I went to a psychologist to get a diagnosis and he said I fit the criteria. My mom- a clinical social worker- said I don't have Asperger's. I think she maybe am aspie or in denial. Anyways, how do I know the difference between my symptoms being from abuse/neglect or being an aspie.

I have trouble lying. I did not learn to tell a white lie until I was like 24. Which is dangerous because sometimes lying is necessary to stay safe from social predators. I studied social skills to sell. I taught myself to identify emotions and I have lots of empathy. At 31, I've adapted to the point most people don't think MUCH of my oddness. They like that I'm nice and honest!

I'm frustrated and confused.

Any thoughts on the difference between neglect VS being an aspie.

A lot of people don't see autism in females because they expect it to be the same in both boys and girls. Denial is more common when there is little that can be done with a diagnosis.

Thank you for your input.

I was wondering if neglect and Asperger's would present the same?

Is it nature or nuture?

I'm glad to have a community. I wish I could have healthy relationships, but it definitely is harder if you have to think consciously about making "friends".

I taught myself a lot of about small talk. I pass for being NT. Thinking about myself as an aspie gives permission to stop trying to so hard to be NT. I just have to accept this is who I am and take care of myself because no one else will take care of me.

I think a lot of Aspies have commented on people being fake or the social world being filled with petty BS. I have a hard time dealing with all the social BS. I can pretend to be NT. At some point I will explicit about who I am and what I want because I don't want to pretend anymore.

Not everybody knows about we supposèdly anomalous so-called Aspies but of the handful few people amongst the profession who do they would likely say that our types are able to meet such criteria.

Not all social-workers are familiar with the ASD since most of their clients are lower-functioning.

Both are possibilities. You don't know the difference without doing more research. I should also point out the fact that even the medical-industry cannot come to any consensus/agreement for defining ASD.

Aspies are considered to generally be a hell of a LOT more honest than your general NT.

You have sounded quite wonderful already ever since the very beginning.

This is not uncommon for those of us in the ASD/HFA-disposition when dealing with NT-Semantics.

Sometimes I think they are related but there are those who insist that the Refrigerator Mom Theory has been thoroughly debunked. From MY research-efforts, everything simply points to what could be called «spiritual» causes for various anomalous-conditions, and the «Nature versus Nurture» hypotheses actually are backed up with repeatable/verifiable evidence/experiments, such as Bruce Lipton's experiments with Petri-Dishes.

I have also noticed significant differences in my interactions with others simply for living or being at a different location. For example, when I used to live in my car, I was able to interact with employers without problem, and even managed to impress them a great deal, such that many of them competed to try and hire me as a full-time-employee. When I lived on a campus in a dormitory, and had unreasonable parents, I could hardly function in memory.

There's a lot more to the story but I have lived amongst multiple walks of life and various social-statuses. I have also noticed significant differences in my productivity depending on if my environment is organised or cluttered.

I believe that there can be over-laps but there are those who insist that it's entirely genetic.
I cannot buy the genetics-argument due to the «conflicting» amount of well-documented evidence that I have read through over the years for seemingly anomalous conditions that turned out to be due to spiritual-causes. I think it is easier for those of us within this «community» for people like you and I to become «friends» due to being able to understand each other's experiences where-as the NT-world is full of excessive incompatibility. I have given a fair amount of input over the years on these forums which has given this community the huge advantage of insights from a much-more-experienced-than-the-average Aspie/ASD/HFA so there are many who have found my posts to be to their great benefit.

Once you gain enough experience in the world you can pass/qualify for just about anything if you're aware of what or whom you're dealing with... I can guarantee that I would only receive the ASD only maybe half the time if evaluated by every single doctor world-wide (depending on if they're civilian, military, brain-washed, indoctrinated, educated, informed/uninformed, etc). I am probably a much more «anomalous» case than most people though.

Welcome to wrong planet

I would give more weight to a psychologist who has given you a thorough assessment than a social worker.

Many people on the spectrum do get abused by bullies and by people who believe "tough love" is needed to "fix" "wrong" behaviors. Thus there are people with both Autism and PTSD.

I would advise your priorities be healing the damage from the abuse you took and finding self-acceptance and coping strategies for traits/symptoms. Be the cause Aspergers, abuse or both the first step is realizing it is not your fault.