Is this normal/common in ASD?

Post Reply New Topic

I am 26 and I still find it so hard to figure out how to do "adult" things, like reading and understanding important documents related to things like bills, insurance, etc. I feel dumb when I get overwhelmed and can't understand what I'm reading or can't figure out how to fill out a form. I usually have to have my parents help me. It makes me feel pathetic because I'm an adult and I feel like I should be able to do these things on my own. I also get so much anxiety when I have to call people over stuff like this because I barely even know what we're talking about. When I was having car troubles, that was really nerve-wracking, at first having to try to articulate what I thought might be wrong with the car, and then after they figured it out and called me back, trying to understand what they were even talking about when they explained the issue in depth. I had to write down as much of it as I could catch (I'm not too good at auditory processing/listening and taking notes at the same time) and then give it to my dad and see if he could "interpret" it for me and try to put it in more simple terms. I actually went to a psychologist yesterday (for now, I'm just seeking treatment for anxiety but am considering an ASD evaluation in the near future) and at the end, the receptionist was explaining how they could work out the payment plan and I was so lost. I still don't even really understand how it's going to work.

When I was a teenager, I thought I was just stupid and "slow". I also thought maybe my brain just wasn't fully developed since I was technically still a kid, and that maybe as I got a little older, these things would become easier for me to understand, but they haven't. I actually was tested for learning disabilities when I was 15. They found that my IQ was 93 I believe, which puts me in the average range, and although they noted that I had a bit of difficulty with a few things (mainly, more abstract concepts and auditory processing, and I also was a little slow at reading comprehension even though I was capable of it), they didn't see enough of an issue to diagnose me with any learning disability. And I did always get good grades in school (mostly A's and B's, with the occasional C...I did very well in language arts, foreign language, and usually did pretty well in social studies. Sometimes struggled a bit with math and science). But because of things like what I've just described in this post, I've always felt like maybe something else is going on with me. I've just never understood why I'm a fairly intelligent person but I struggle so much with some of these abstract things that other adults don't seem to find difficult. And I really worry about how I'm going to function as an adult. This isn't the only reason I've thought I might have ASD, but it's one of them.

Judging by your post you are intellegent

Anxiety and Attention issues are common cooccurring conditions with autism. Austics also often get into thought loops and have difficulty multitasking. These cooccuring conditions can distract and overwhelm autistics away from the task at hand.

Some suggestions
Try and schedule adult tasks at the same time of day and at a time of day when you are not tired

When you do these tasks try and elimate distactions including any lighting, noise and smells that make you uncomfortable

Brake down the task into several mini tasks and try and concentrate only on those mini tasks.

If you are getting overwhelmed take a deep breath take a walk or do some excersises and comeback.

Autistic people do what is called stimming which are repetitive body movements. A lot of times we suppress them because we are embarrased by them, or we did them as kids and were punished for them. For Autistic people these stims are a natural calming mechanism. So revert to doing what comes naturally especially in private.

Good luck

Yeah I don't know how to be an adult.

At some point in my life, however, I stopped caring about it.

Sorry, I couldn't adult enough to resist it

But seriously, it's good you have your parents' help. Asking for help is a very useful skill many adults lack.
It will get a bit better with routine, I can tell from the perspective of paying taxes and reading agreements for a few years. Anyway, you are good in languages and humanities, other people may be skilled in bureaucracy and negotiations. That's how it is. My NT, successful sister-in-law still needs help with simple mechanical tasks. We are talented differently so we can share