New to AS - what does an adult do?

Post Reply New Topic

Hello, my name is Joey. I'm in my late forties, and have a recent diagnosis of AS, which is ... exciting and new and whoa! I'm reaching out to other mature adults for some advisements - I've been reading the forums anonymously, and I am amazed at both the resonance I'm feeling, and disconcert. I thought "NT" meant 'neanderthal terrestrial', and I thought neuro-plasticity was another way of saying autism.

Frankly, I'm a little lost, and don't know where to turn next. I love the adage "don't look back, you aren't going that way" yet I am indeed looking back and seeing so much in a new light.

Looking forward - THAT is intimidating!

I do not know any other autistics, yet am pleased to feel welcome here, and certainly the tone of the posts have me smiling and nodding my head. I hope to contribute in the same stead as I progress on this journey...

Adults do a wide variety of things on WP, just like anywhere else.

What do you enjoy doing?

I enjoy learning, in all its forms. Naps are luxurious. I think long walks are my favourite thing, the 'non sweaty' kind. I suppose I'm asking for tips as a person new to this diagnosis - I don't even know if I should tell my friends!! !

What happened to me was that I slowly started to fit together the jigsaw puzzle of my life. Otherwise we are such a varied lot that there aren't any ground rules. The link is to a booklet meant for young adults, but I found it useful in my late 50's, which is how late my dx came in

https://www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/alistai ... rvival.pdf

Otherwise my social life is precisely the internet, but I have a couple of friends who are undiagnosed but very aspie and we watch movies. Society and me keep our distance from each other.

Oh I was talking all about me (highly tempting when you are me), so let me extend a hearty welcome to the OP. Apart from the occasional troll this place looks pretty friendly to me.

I found people very unpredictable about my telling them about me being an aspie, some of my family have been very good, and some very bad. It actually helped me to repair some of my relationship with my father. My guess is that if you have a job, it is NOT a good idea to tell your boss or your work mates unless everyone in the place is an aspie.

Otherwise, as I am a chatty in your face type of extrovert sometimes, if I am talking to a stranger I always tell them I am an aspie. Then if they get funny about it I know they are a bad person.

Thanks for the welcome!! ! I think the work disclosure warning is helpful - I was told to 'speak to other AS folk first'. Hmph! I'm really glad I posted here before I started "doing the rounds" of my life.

Indeed, I don't know much about AS, thus, I am hoping for those 'ah ha' moments looking back as I proceed.

Helpful, thank you so much!

Welcome to Wrong Planet.

The initial confusion about where to go next, and the "life review" are very common experiences that most of us who were diagnosed later in life go through (I was diagnosed nearly four years ago, aged 45.) The looking back isn't too bad a thing, I don't think, it's good to clear out of all those weird events we went through earlier in life that we just couldn't explain, and finally put them to rest. As you settle in, I can almost guarantee you that you'll start having the "aha" moments that you're looking for, I still have them from time to time even now. The best thing, I think, is not to go looking too hard for them, but let them happen naturally; it can be very surprising sometimes which conversations lead to them, and you don't want to miss out on any because you were too busy looking in the wrong place - to use Donald Rumsfeld's (in)famous words, the "unknown unknowns" that I've stumbled upon have often been the ones that I've found most profound.

I'm deeply grateful for the insights. I've been dealing with this on my own, and ... have realized the only thing that has changed is 'there is a name for folks like me'. I have the sincerest feeling that that makes them feel better. I have not changed. That said, the 'a ha' moments have been sweet, if at times disconcerting. I will keep from looking for them - indeed!

It is very common for newly diagnosed adults to look back and see things in the new light. We have been living our lives and making decisions based on incomplete information about who we are. Looking back with the new knowledge and seeing WHY good and bad decision were made can help as avoid making bad decision and help us make decisions that emphasizes our strengths we did not realize we had.