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Female AS/Male NT Relationships

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Are you a...
Female aspie who has dated an aspie 12%  12%  [ 10 ]
Female aspie who has dated an NT 41%  41%  [ 33 ]
Female aspie who has not been in a relationship/other 7%  7%  [ 6 ]
Male aspie who has dated an aspie 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Male aspie who has dated an NT 16%  16%  [ 13 ]
Male aspie who has not been in a relationship/other 11%  11%  [ 9 ]
Female NT who has dated an aspie 2%  2%  [ 2 ]
Male NT who has dated an aspie 1%  1%  [ 1 ]
NT who has not dated/dated other NT's 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Other 9%  9%  [ 7 ]
Total votes : 81

hotglassmama
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

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Joined: 28 Nov 2008
Age: 67
Gender: Female
Posts: 4
Location: Riverside, California

29 Nov 2008, 5:29 am

Hi everyone, I'm new here. LOVE this site!! !

I'm an Aspie female, and I've dated another Aspie guy, and been in relationships with NT men mostly. I'm currently seeing a NT man I've known since high school, who admits to not being able to follow most of my conversations with him even after knowing me all these years. I DO usually get around to my original point, but in a circuitous manner that he finds convoluted in reasoning and torturously lengthy to endure. I will probably ultimately resort to grunting out syllables shortly before he finally delivers the dreaded, but inevitable, "let's just be friends" speech.

As for the Aspie guy I dated, my narrow interests and his narrow interests were dissimilar. I would drone on endlessly about beads and their manufacture, and he would drone on ad nauseum about types of printmaking papers. We are both highly educated people, but with interests that didn't overlap much, so I'm not really sure we were communicating. We are still friends, but the romance part was short lived due to my lack of interest in printmaking papers, and in romance in general. I'd prefer a bouquet of fresh paint brushes or a box of broken cathedral glass to roses, and this was a crushing blow to his romantic sensibilities. Does anyone else here find traditional romance sappy and overrated? I wanted to vomit when he quoted Shakespeare, and I suppose most women dream of such things, but never actually have them happen.
Not during coffee at Denny's, anyway. . . . I'm pretty sure he found my reaction to romantic gestures disappointing as well.

:roll: alyx



notlurkingwell
Tufted Titmouse
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Joined: 4 Jul 2007
Age: 50
Gender: Female
Posts: 27

29 Nov 2008, 3:11 pm

For valentine's day one year my beloved booked me on a two day wilderness survival course.

No-one understood why I thought this an incredibly romantic gesture.

He gave me something which showed how much he understands me. Awwww.

:heart:



hotglassmama
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Joined: 28 Nov 2008
Age: 67
Gender: Female
Posts: 4
Location: Riverside, California

30 Nov 2008, 4:16 am

I would have LOVED a wilderness survival two day trip!! !! That sounds like it was sooooooooooooo much fun!! ! Glad someone else has my sense of what is a truly great gift and not just mainstream romantic foo foo.

:D Alyx



arkityp
Raven
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Joined: 18 Jul 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 114

19 Dec 2008, 10:10 pm

female with AS who has been in 6 NT relationships = fail
2 relationships with AS partners = win



hale_bopp
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Joined: 2 Nov 2004
Gender: Female
Posts: 17,054
Location: None

20 Dec 2008, 6:52 am

If I ever end up in a relationship, the guy will probably be NT. I don't know many male aspies IRL, and the ones I do i'm not interested in like that..

TBH I think a mistake a lot of aspie guys make is trying too hard to get a female with aspergers and overlooking the possibility of a great match with an NT woman.