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RightGalaxy
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27 Feb 2020, 7:51 pm

How can anybody be "proud" to be human? Look what human beings do to one another. :cry:



auntblabby
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28 Feb 2020, 1:13 am

being "ashamed" of one's human-ness is a signpost on the road to transcendence. :idea:



magz
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28 Feb 2020, 2:21 am

auntblabby wrote:
being "ashamed" of one's human-ness is a signpost on the road to transcendence. :idea:

or suicide. :skull:


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auntblabby
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28 Feb 2020, 2:41 am

magz wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
being "ashamed" of one's human-ness is a signpost on the road to transcendence. :idea:

or suicide. :skull:

point taken, i shoulda said it was the signpost @ the fork in the road leading either to transcendence or the cul-de-sac.



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29 Feb 2020, 1:26 pm

Eh, I mean. I'm learning to accept the traits that are harmless... (self-talk, special interests, stimming and echolalia) but there are things we can work on too (social etiquette, reciprocity, time management etc).

You kind of have to strike a balance between traits you want acceptance for and problems that you do need to solve.


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29 Feb 2020, 6:34 pm

Never been ashamed nor proud to be autistic.
But I do pride myself as an autistic who can overcome the fate and cycle of disproportionate anxiety and depression -- never had meds, never had formal therapy -- that many NDs fallen into, in which many can't get out from even with support, accommodation and understanding.

I savor the fact that I don't have phobias, have lesser things to deal with, and born with serious compensation abilities, but this does not mean to be proud of. It's simply something I have, along with the other things I supposed to be ashamed of.


auntblabby wrote:
magz wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
being "ashamed" of one's human-ness is a signpost on the road to transcendence. :idea:

or suicide. :skull:

point taken, i shoulda said it was the signpost @ the fork in the road leading either to transcendence or the cul-de-sac.

Been at such road apparently since age 4 or so.
Intellectually, it was a liberating road. Emotionally, it was a road full of frustration, guilt and self loathing for someone so immature.
There was no compass or any sort, only defence mechanisms and malice.

I've came across the suicidal route at age 14. Apparently either scared the hell out of me or is blocked -- something overwhelmed me by looking at it. Unsure if any higher power was involved, but I'd never consider such path ever again. Nothing and no one explicitly convinced me except everything else.
This is also before when I start doing 'label works' on autism. It was then the word autism is the compass.

In between this, there's the self-loathing, conditional acceptance, the enticement of supremacy and segregation, projections, disillusionments, denials, dissonance... There's this pride simply putting stoppers on holes, defending from those who poke those holes. The justifications, 'us vs them'...
Then there's also the fulfillments, resonance, validation... And it's bottomless need of sympathy and enabling through the chosen identity. Many seem to be stuck at this stage and many can also fallback into it.

Was this was the cul-be-sac? :wink:

To realize that the endless need of fulfillment just perpetuate the cycle of one's idea of 'human-ness', and as is the ideas' 'need' is not all that makes one human -- a realization beyond the intellectual knowledge, may lead to discernment from unconditional acceptance, self love and inner peace.

Or madness. :lol: By either denying or clinging so hard on 'identity', by being too worked up with 'right and wrong' along with 'beliefs and disbeliefs', 'can and cannot', 'haves and not haves', etc.
Overly identifying myself to what my body, mind and past dictates, whether functional or dysfunctional -- that includes 'words', 'actions' and 'circumstances', whether maladaptive and benign, as opposed to simply taking it as a fact that 'it is' and 'it happened'. This is not all that is human, just like 'empathy', emotions and sensations does not all make one human.

Only to recently stumbled on a more direct road of transcendence at age 24. On sheer dumb luck.
It just occurred to me as opposed to looking for it -- as if time is handing things out for me instead of worldly experiences and circumstances.
Practically before finishing 'label work' on autism and just had graduated because of it. I'd keep the autism's old compass for reference's sake.

This year, I'm turning 25.
One of the things I'd plan doing is to keep inner world under control and just finish the damn stories already! As it's random fragments of scenes had been playing in my head over and over needlessly... It served me well before and now it no longer serves me.
On a road that there's nothing to be proud of nor to be ashamed of. :lol: In which there's nothing for me to defend.


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29 Feb 2020, 8:36 pm

I'm very proud my daughter looks at the world so objectively and is resistant to the bias that NTs absorb so quickly from group think. Her innocence and lack of hatred/malice she is teaching me much about myself and how much I can grow and develop as a human being.

She is proud of being herself...the label of autism has nothing to do with it...it is after all an NT creation



FeralDreamer
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29 Feb 2020, 8:44 pm

Have these issues and I think the main problem causing them is the current system in place plus the culture it created.

If we lived in pre-industrial times there would have been all sorts of jobs that don't require 'STEM' or much communication at all that could have earned you plenty of money. Although some are risky but contained excitement.

Many non-communication jobs I once dreamt of wanting to work are in the history books and no longer available, or are now illegal (Like being a mercenary that protects people from bad things without joining the army first). Idk, in theory because they aren't communication jobs.

It was reported by some that many people who worked in artisan or mercenary band jobs had traits that would kind of resemble stereotypes of the autism spectrum today.

Also people were in closer knit communities and did not often have to interact with strangers, it seems we were built for that life?



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09 Mar 2020, 1:46 pm

Who knows what life any one of us was built for? We all fit into the Autism Spectrum constellation in some way, but how we relate to the dx and each other can be quite different.

A lot of us may have been made to feel ashamed for harmless behavior (echolalia and stimming), called the "r" word continuously, and pride is a way of rebelling from the type of shame we were made to feel. All that said, I also understand why some don't view their dx with pride.

We need to let everyone tell their own stories about what their "autism" means to them. Trying to overgeneralize is one of the worst habits of this community...


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14 Mar 2020, 3:23 pm

As I wrote here:

- I take pride in the ways I've worked around my difficulties, not by heavy-duty "masking" but by finding places where I could be myself as much as possible. (My greatest desire these days is to help other autistic people find or create such places too.)
- I take pride in the ways I've resisted and avoided pressures to conform to oppressive norms.
- I take pride in being a deep analytical thinker. (And I think most of us are deeper thinkers than the average person is; we pretty much have to be.)
- I take pride in my curiosity and my natural desire to acquire deep knowledge of whatever I'm fascinated by. (If that's an autistic trait, then, without the existence of autism or at least BAP, science would never have come into being, nor technology, nor scholarship of any kind.)


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14 Mar 2020, 6:39 pm

FeralDreamer wrote:
Many non-communication jobs I once dreamt of wanting to work are in the history books and no longer available, or are now illegal (Like being a mercenary that protects people from bad things without joining the army first). Idk, in theory because they aren't communication jobs.


The recent coronavirus has illustrated that almost all professional services need to be able to be delivered online. This will be of benefit to you as online jobs are more reliant on written communication and less on verbal.



dilbertthefilbert
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24 Mar 2020, 2:26 am

darkphantomx1 wrote:
How can anyone be proud of being autistic? You've read the statistics. A good majority of us are unemployed, live on social security benefits, don't drive, have very few to no friends, in our 20s and never dated, don't drive, don't go to college. How can anyone be proud of that? Autism makes you unique? Unique don't mean s**t when you're depressed all the time because you have no friends and can't get a job because of your differences or when you're living on your own off of SSI or Medicaid and unemployed. A good majority of us are losers; we're misunderstood by neurotypicals, we're nerds, we have no friends, we work low pay minimum wage job, our only friends are our parents. Some of us don't even parents to help us anymore.

That's the sad truth for many of you. Half of your autistic brothers and sisters will live a life like this because of autism. Yes, even many of you with HFA will live like this. Because you were born different, because you were born with autism. You never could live up to your full potential.

So tell me, how can anyone be proud of being autistic? Because I would cure it if given the opportunity.







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dilbertthefilbert
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02 Apr 2020, 5:35 pm

...thread killer? " Bocie " was (Is :? ?) something in New York State for " spaz/ret*d " for Boards of Cooperative Educational Services, a " special " division (not in the five biggest school districts in NYS).



luzzybinnedheart
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05 Apr 2020, 5:15 pm

That's an interesting question :? ...........


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Autistic_fireman
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11 Apr 2020, 7:17 am

darkphantomx1 wrote:
So tell me, how can anyone be proud of being autistic? Because I would cure it if given the opportunity.


I'm proud because I was able to overcome a lot of that through rigorous self-analysis and improvement. Not to mention that many of the greatest minds in history would be considered to have ASD by modern clinical standards.

I don't know you personally though or what your problems are, but I don't believe for one second that you are 'trapped'. Take it from someone who has started several income-producing businesses, it's actually easier than you'd think. You don't even have to have a great business idea, you just need to be willing to push yourself to adopt it as a primary focus. Then obsess over it, and when you get some progress, seek feedback, listen to the feedback and make adjustments and keep that cycle going. There is an old version of you that exists fifty years from now who would love nothing more than to kick your ass into gear.

The hardest part is starting.


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11 Apr 2020, 7:50 am

I have no problem with who I am and if someone could wave a magic wand to take my ASD away then I wouldnt want them to.

Pride? Not sure.

Acceptance? Yes.

I do not view it as something invasive, alien, unwanted or harmful. It is an integral part of me and I am OK with myself. In consequence I am OK with my ASD.


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