Being Scared of Autism

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Being Scared of Autism

Note: The following is not intended for purely analytical expression and is bias. It is the result of frustration, disappointment by me toward other self-advocates and the what I think of at times as the crazy online autism political world.

Many parents find being scared of autism to come easy. In fact for many its the first response. While online advocates have socially attacked my mother as making others feel sorry for me she has never appeared in any news article, television news or public awareness with concern to my autism and my advocacy which is not my mothers. So I deduced that despite them not knowing my mother self-advocates will attack parents they do not know because of other parents advocacy even though my mom had nothing to do with or ever had anything to do with my advocacy. This sort of blind assertion by advocates is mal-productive and creates social conflict and of which the rational world will reject and ethically.

For some any adverse view of autism is unacceptable. While the law, science and mainstream states somewhat otherwise such as saying it is a disability I can only logically partly agree with these radicals whom are possibly tied to special interest or whom have been influenced by them to have such reckless and ill productive false fact pride. Why are they so scared of me to spread lies saying I have a police record of calling people and making threats, stocking people when I seldom leave my house without a support worker and harass people I do not even interact with. It's amazing to me the politics of the autism community at times which aspects of which have done more to alienate themselves then establishment and society (the so called neurtypicals) had ever intended to. It was stated by them they are afraid I will remove their social progress when I just asked questions and think for myself. I greatly dislike self-advocacy peer pressure and think as much as possible analytically to understand the emotions of others and instinct. Also if I didn't know about their so said progress and have a different way of understanding and believing why should I respect people that seem to cause more conflict then good as a person with autism. It's as if folks at times believe they are dogs and peed and marked the internet territory while I am able to go from political group to political group on average and be positively received whilst others have their marked territory and battle lines.

So the root of this being scared of autism also means being scared of those with autism who think differently by those at times that dis-promote being fearful of autism. Self-advocates hate parents at times for being afraid. My mom said since early on she thought something was wrong with me and took me in for autism in the 80's. However she is not afraid of me on a day to day basis nor do I think she spends her days thinking something is wrong with me. Why is it so maliciously perceived at times that autism in a child by parents is a fearful thing to hear? Is it not acceptable to try to get along and understand other peoples emotions and not force, scam and demand they perceive you and others a certain way or else they are like bigots.

Nathan Young

Professional Advocate & Media Consultant

No. Not under any circumstance.

One extreme will be met with another extreme. Intolerance with intolerance. Discrimination with reverse discrimination. When I was growing up it was no easy thing. Not having those difficulties and transitional problems would have greatly improved my quality of life. Had the educational systems been competent then it would have been different. Does not being alert of autism mean the same as being afraid. If being aware of disabilities and to seek to improve them is to harsh why label to begin with and just see differences as differences and accommodate as needed. Labeling complicates everything. It is my opinion that a mother and or fathering being afraid for their child is only human and should be respected and to not respect this seems to result in conflict. To call that hate or unreasonable is not acceptable and won't succeed. Should my mother not been alert and tried to get me help I may never had IEPs and I might be homeless now.

Yes. At first but differences should be embraced.

This to me shows a parent cares in the first place and in the long run. A child knowing a parent disapproved with how they are at any level may cause long-term problems. No parents and even child is perfect in their behavior toward one another especially when it comes to a label such as autism. A parent being positive toward a child is important for the self-esteem development and the self-image of the child. This option is the middle ground and doesn't usually entail throwing fire balls at each extreme in the social politics of acceptance vs. non-acceptance.

Yes. Do everything possible to change abnormality perceived by normalcy.

This could backfire if the mentality is this clear. This may be the root of the online conflicts in part and the psychosocial devide between parents and aging adult children. No one has the ability to suddenly not be what and whom they are. Acceptance can lead to positive outcomes and implying and or demanding change can lead to resistance of change..

I am a moderate in autism social politics.

No. Not under any circumstance.

Think about peer pressure for a moment. This has allot to do with the abortion politic. Should society see autism as a disability to be accommodated for people might then abort. However not taking autism seriously and providing the therapy and services needed would cause great harm. A parents reaction is the first step in advocacy. Albeit at times very emotional a balance might come with first understanding why parents are upset such as why their child does not speak or can't function well in the mainstream. Sometimes it may be assumed being scared of a disability is rejecting the entire person and people have gone ahead and made it more personal by calling themselves a made up label. Autism defines difficulties a person experiences in which under the law require accommodations and assistance.

Ultimately it is natural for a parent to be worried. It's what parents do best and is instinct. Acceptance and making room for people with disabilities in the world is a great next step and progress has been made. However to use or play upon parental fear in marketing such as what non-profits have done in such ways I don't think is good for the mental health of developing children with autism or the mental well being of parents.

It is ok for a parent to experience worry (fear) and there is nothing wrong with that but for the quality of life and societal acceptance of individuals of course positivity is good.

Why would parents fear Autism? Well for the same reason people feared the shadows on the walls and didn't want to look and see what was actually making the shadows. It's an unknown. As a mother I want what is best for my child I envision my child talking, having friends, living independently and doing many things. When he got diagnosed it broke my heart. Why? Because instead of having the life that would be easy he is going to struggle with things most people take for granted. My child isn't talking like others? What will he be like in 15 yrs? Will he go to school? The word Autism to most parents is a terrifying word it brings to mind very upsetting images. The fear was there for a long time for me until I got my own diagnosis of being on the Autism Spectrum....only Then did it go away. It's no longer an unknown......I know what it is and how to help now.

I had epilepsy I got massive amounts of help as a child and for the most part unless you are around me a whole lot or I'm stressed, overloaded, sick, or exhausted my symptoms don't show. Why are they afraid? They don't see enough adults and they are not hearing stories about having Autism and being happy/successful on their terms. On a basic level it is a failure to communicate that strikes to the core. The parent feels quite often that they have failed to protect their child. Abortion could be seen as an easy way out.....there is no fear of the unknown. No nights worrying about the child's future. I have one child with Autism and another that I think is an aspie. I have AS and can easily get inside their heads but most NT mother's have no idea about what their kids are thinking/feeling/experiencing why they are upset.(sensory problems) Nor do they have sensory issues that allow them to understand what their child is experiencing. Fearful, broken hearted, and emotionally devastated they start looking for information and Autism Speaks is right there......with their ads and heartbreaking sadness. It makes parents feel a desperation which they already experiencing. Autism Speaks hits at emotions not logic and that is their big draw. Your heartbroken and scared and they are right there ready to send you information and to listen to you as a parent and give advice via their website.

Only when how Autism is perceived receives an overhaul will it not be utterly heartbreaking and that involves a change in what society will accept. Yet somehow this change can't eliminate the help those on the spectrum desperately need and there is the idea that if you need help you are therefore broken. Perhaps it is that jump in logic that needing help=broken that should be corrected.

Yep I'd agree. Thanks for sharing. I am working out my approach that preserves dignity, has nothing to do with autism abortion and sees people as people and not labels in a human diversity approach. It's the labels that mean defect instead of differences that are the root of this problem. Culturally it is manifest in awareness this concern but culturally to perceive differences as simply part of the human condition and just as much to be included for reasons of the best possible collective adaptation in progress. Unfortunately the multitude of paralleled issues in the autism psychosocial and political framework create conflict, conflict of interest and bias either purposely or not. What a complex and interesting intellectual puzzle.