Unable to make progress

Post Reply New Topic

As the title states I cannot progress with my fitness. This may turn into a rant which I will apologize for in advance but I need to properly explain my scenario.

I have been going to the gym a minimum of 4 days a week for 8 years. Have tried almost every routine out there from the standard " bro splits" to german volume training, to olympic style lifting etc aswell as lately cutting cardio completely from my routine to solely focus on muscle building. Plus I am literally ocd with my macros and weighing every single thing I eat and drink.

I am 5ft8, 158 lbs and currently eating 4600 calories a day which for an unemployed, semi functioning agorophobe whose only physical activities are the gym 4 times a week and walking my dog is a hell of a lot of food.

Also have been to the doctor to get things like my thyroid and testosterone levels checked, all came back fine. Im not exaggerating I really have been doing this for 8 years(a third of my life) yet I cannot figure out how its possible for me to go from lazy, depressed teen eating whatever I felt like to going to the gym despite my severe nerves, monitoring everything I consume, getting sufficient protein,fat,carbs and working out with enough weight to really challenge me but not so much as to sacrifice form yet not progress in either direction- as during the years I have tried both cutting body fat aswell as bulking focusing on one goal for months at a time I havent been swapping between them too often and not giving my body a chance to change

Has anyone else had problems in this regard? if so did you find a solution?

I find that having working towards specific goal at a time helps. Focus on one aspect of the total fitness picture at a time. And not just like "I want to be stronger." More like "I want to add 25lbs to my bench press," or "I want to climb a mountain."

We aren't (I'm assuming your on the spectrum since you on here) all that great with general concepts or "big picture thinking." Some of us are better than others but its holds true for most. So turn your big picture "fitness" into a detail "like beat Mayweather." That should help you reduce stress and hope get some good results going.

Also your 24 (if my math is right) and you could have one more growth spurt in the tank. My final one was at 25 and I went from 5'10" 170's to 6' 190's. So time is on your side.

Yes I am on the spectrum

my goal is the same as its been for roughly 5 years, initially I was training to meet military requirements but that was before my diagnosis which in turn ruled out the military, since then its been to get abs. Which I know is very vain, and I am not naive enough to think having abs will fix all my insecurities. However, if i was able to get rid of my unjustified torso fat which again inexplicably has been the exact same percent since i first got it measured little over 4 years ago that would be a big step towards feeling comfortable in my own skin for the first time ever.

Ive tried both cutting and bulking as theres a lot of debate about which order is best - build muscle then cut fat or vice versa, but neither has made any difference to strength, weight, fat percent etc.

Oh man I have been there! It is frustrating.

What has worked for me was focusing on conditioning exercises as the bulk of my workout. Running, jumping rope, and a bunch of interval stuff with light weights or pull ups/push ups. I keep my weight lifting restricted to the olympic lifts and the big three(bench press, squat, deadlift).

I don't worry about I eat. So I can't really offer any advice on that.

The problem must be on the eating side, try to make bigger intervals between intakes, is your eating stimming in some way? I've seen chewing-toys for that somewhere on wp.
To get away from food you would have to go out more, is there access to quiet places where you can walk or bike ?
Doing gardening for other people?
Having a good shape depends largely on your daily activities.

And having courage outweights strenght !

I have tried lots of eating schedules including various fasting routines. The only issue with food that I can see is that because even leaving the house makes me so nervous that I will be physically ill makes it hard to properly digest my food but I plan my eating times around any forseeable trips outside to help minimise the impact.

Unfortunately theres really nothing else I can do daily activity wise, walking my dog is a massive stressful, and often vomit inducing experience.(sorry I know thats gross)

Also personally I would disagree with this "And having courage outweights strenght !" as I said in my first post "I have been going to the gym a minimum of 4 days a week for 8 years" that means i've been ill a minimum of 4 days a week for 8 years, but im not benefiting from not letting that stop me from facing my nerves, whereas if my training was paying off and I had increased strength I would be on my way to being comfortable in my own skin

Sorry if im coming across rude or dismissive of the answers, I do appreciate the help, im just trying to be honest talking about the things i've tried thus far

I second this advice for your situation. Your primary goal seems to be to lose weight and look fit, this is what aerobic exercise does. It is more time consuming since you have to do it for about an hour at a time. The best aerobic exercise is probably swimming because it makes your whole body work, then running and bicycling is also good. There are also stationary exercises you can do if you are feeling lazy.

With regards to strength training, I've heard that if you work out too much, you wear out your body without giving it time to grow muscle. I think once or twice a week is more than enough to grow some muscle. If you want to look like an athlete, then you really need a customized routine, which a good personal trainer could help you with (they are expensive though).

I would like to know if you are familiar with the work of a Dr. Weston Price... here...

I will address the vomiting portion another day if necessary.

Just to get a better idea of might be in the way of your results. Are you throwing up from the stress of being out in public at the gym or from the intensity of your workout?

Vomelche - the best I can do on the aerobic front is the treadmill, I'm far too uncomfortable to go swimming and of the cardio machines in the gym the treadmill would be the most effecient. I have actually been with 2 seperate trainers now one who was based in the gym and one private but after 6 months with the first and roughly 8 with the second I wasnt getting my money's worth as I was still struggling with the same plateaus.

Ban-Dodger- ive watched 45 minutes so far, not seeing the point to be honest so far she's only covered "traditional" diets of native people and talked about the best diet being a one balanced between animal and plant products, which is how I would describe mine ive no intention of relying heavily on manufactured supplements and products to meet my macros. Also on that note though there are a fair few vegetarian and vegan athletes from bodybuilders to cyclists to MMA fighters etc. Anyway I will watch the rest of the video later and maybe see whatever may going over my head so far

cooksp53 -mostly the first part- every single morning before going to the gym I will be ill and if its particularly busy I will be ill again upon getting home. I have thrown up in the gym before from pushing myself too hard but thats very rare and has only happened a handful of times in all my years going.

Ok I think we are getting to the "core"(get it? cause you want abs) of your plateau problem.

I think its the social anxiety that is causing you to get ill. Throwing up before and after your workout from the stress is preventing you from getting into a good recovery mode. Bad recovery = bad results.

You may want to take a break from the gym. Not from working out but just the gym.

In the mean time work on push ups, pull ups, and sit ups for strength. You can do those everyday without worrying to much about recovery like with powerlifting or doing bodypart splits.

To help your stress while walking your dog you could get a weighted vest. The weight vest will not only turn up the intensity of the walk but many people on the spectrum (including myself) find some extra weight from a vest, thick hoodie, or backpack to be comforting.

You may also have autoimmune disease, which can handicap your ability to exercise. I kind of have this too, so I cannot do too much exercise on top of daily work or it will make me sick. Basically if working out makes you sick, stop do only what you can or it will be counterproductive (pushing yourself only works for some people).

Also I would agree with above to avoid gyms. I never particularly liked them due to being crowded. I would otherwise recommend joining a good martial art club as those ones will guarantee you a pretty good workout. I go to one at least twice a weak and occasionally do muscle training with a kettle bell at home, which keeps me in reasonable shape so far.

Do you have any digestive issues? Last year I tried eating at least 400 cals a day for 6 months with some days as much as 5000 calories over 9 meals a day and was unable to ever get past 134lbs at 5'10.5". All the food passed right through me. I had diarrhea everyday. I have an absorption problem.

I would lift weights, get stronger but be completely unable to gain weight. Some lifts like bench were limited by my low body weight and I couldn't really progress as much with them without adding more muscle mass.

You will gain weight not when you eat more calories than you burn but when you absorb more calories than you burn.

cooksp53- the weighted vest is an interesting idea, I never leave the house without a big bulky coat regardless of the temperature, although id simply attributed that to my lack of self esteem and being ashamed of my physique I didn't associate that with my autism.

Vomelche- I have actually avoided the gym, its been two weeks now, which is by far the longest ive missed in these past 8 years, it is nice to not be ill as many times a day(now its only caused by walking my dog) but I cant stop both feeling like a failure aswell as comparing myself to others and then getting unbelievably frustrated and pissed off because "normal" people even ones that like heavy drinking on the weekends and dont count macros seem to easily be able to achive in a matter of months the exact goal ive been chasing as logically as possible for years.
unfortunately though i cannot join any kind of athletic or martial arts groups, even the thought of doing so is enough to bring me to the verge of being ill and I can guarantee if I faced my nerves and went anyway the entire session I would constantly be excusing myself to rush to the bathroom


Noca- yes, in the sense that every single day im sick, mostly vomit but sometimes diarrhoea due to nerves about leaving the house to walk my dog, I do what I can i.e schedule my meals for after the walks so the food will be in my system for atleast a few hours oppose to eat- be sick- walk dog all within about a 90 minute window, but thats all I can do on that front. Obviously if i could get a better handle on my nerves and not be sick would be ideal but so far no medication or psychiatry has even dented the severity of my nerves

You might consider seeing a hypnotic-regression therapist if nothing else has been working/helping.
Somehow this seems to be more of a psychological-issue than a physical-condition.

I know that they may not necessarily be easy to find but it looks like a search-directory is available.
I am not sure if you would categorise your feelings as Anxiety or Phobia/etc (has drop-down-list though).

I have actually considered hypnotherapy before, but the price has always put me off, the few places ive looked at within travelling distance are hundreds of pounds per session which I dont know if i can afford. Anyway since its pretty much the only thing ive yet to try I have found someone who offers a free initial consultation so im gonna try and arrange that see how that goes.