I hate my football team so much

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Hi guys,

Not sure whether this should be in the haven or here. I'll try it here first.

I have recently joined a football team. I used to play football back at school, and although girls weren't really allowed to play, being in a country/rural area no one cared until I got to about 12 and then I was literally banned and my parents wouldn't let me anyway. Also I'm Australian and this is AFL I'm talking about (Australian Rules Football). I love AFL, it is the only sport I watch on TV. I also used to be super sporty and when I was banned from AFL I played soccer (football for UK/Europeans out there!!) and netball, and I'll have a go at almost every sport.

Enough background info.
Womens AFL has sort of taken off over the last couple of years. I finally joined a team, but compared to all the other teams I have ever played in, they are super serious. They train 3 nights a week which I can't commit to with my job and being involved in local theatre, so the coach knows I can only do one night a week and said it was ok. My social skills are far more advanced than what they used to be when I was at school, but I hate my team. I love the game but I hate my team. Here's why:

- no one on the team likes me. They are all 16-21 year olds at school or uni and I'm 27 and work at a processing facility. They don't talk to me even if I talk to them. I tackled one of them last training and she went off her face at me cause i nearly kicked her hand. Come on, it's AFL!

- the coach loves the other girls and flirts with them. It is embarrassing to watch. I feel like a daggy loser but just can't bring myself to bleach/straighten my hair before training and wear horrible Lorna Jane crop tops and tights that cost more than they should. I show up in my steel capped boots with black dust on my hands and face because I have work immediately before training.

- the coach has only let me play 1 quarter during the whole pre season. When he took me off he told me "I'm not putting you back on anymore. You're too undercooked." I don't know what that means. Am I a steak?

- with the exception of about 5 girls who have played for our first state womens team a few years ago, the other girls don't even watch AFL. They don't even know what the positions are. Most of them just go to the gym or play netball if they play anything. The coach then asked the team if anyone has experience playing full forward (a position). I said yes, then he laughed at me saying "hahahahaha not talking about soccer, Cad."

-My one quarter the coach let me play I showed up on time but couldn't find the team. I was unfamiliar with the ground and by the time I found them I was "late" and the coach was mad. I had to put my uniform on in this corridor because the boys team took over the change rooms. A family friend plays on the team and her dad is the captain. He was there but he didn't help at all. My family is close to that family, and whenever I see him on Christmas etc. we get along really well and drink beers together. He is like a second dad or uncle to me normally.

-my one quarter I played I was full forward. The coach and my team mates got mad because I didn't run up to the centre line because my dumb player did. That is not the job of the full forward. Then the coach brought me off and told me I was undercooked.

-the....organiser? of the club? (don't know her actual role) makes us do stupid things like raffles and help out with the cooking and BBQs at the boys matches. We are expected to show up to all the mens/seniors/U-16s games to support them. We were also expected to join in on the Anzac Day parade and things like that. I DON'T CARE. I just want to play football. I used to play for a womens soccer team who were in a bigger league than this football team is and we never had to do anything like that. I never have enough time to help out.

-the organiser and coach want us to get sponsors etc for the club to help pay for umpires etc. Why can't we just pay a membership fee. My work won't support any of my theatre things let alone a womens AFL team.

I love football but I hate my team so much. The community here is very small and I have a feeling that all the teams would be like this. What can I do?? Do other people have this problem??

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