Who else on here has Borderline Personality Disorder?

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Exactly!

However, the Asperger's diagnosis makes me feel less broken. When I was first diagnosed with bpd I thought it fit really well but it didn't help me learn what the catalysts for my behaviors were. I went through years of therapy but nothing ever changed. Now with the Asperger's diagnosis things are much easier. I used to think that I just became a screaming, raging wreck for no reason . I was never able to connect all of the different odd parts of me together to understand how the chain reaction happened. Now I am able to understand what my limits are and what I can do to circumvent them.

My psych eval has a large amount of diagnoses on it and the principal diagnosis is Anxiety disorder. However, I am able to link everything to the Asperger's. I hope to get everything else taken off by my next psych eval.

I don't think I could ever be comfortable with my emotionality. The idea for me is that I don't want to go into a rage, ever again. Also I don't want to break down and cry all the time, anytime a sad thought occurs....


The road to acceptance is proving to be long for me. It's good to read you've overcome this in your life.

Although it's not exactly a pleasant thought, I also suspect I might have either BPD or Bipolar disorder. My father has been quite...a character (schizo and most likely BPD), and although I've always wanted to have nothing to do with him, I keep finding more and more things about myself that are similar to him over time. However, although I am slightly on the dysfunctional side socially, I can't help but be worried that going to a professional to find out whatever problem I have will negatively impact me in the future. From what I've heard, those who get diagnosed with BPD aren't regarded very well by some medical professionals. But my sister has told me that she's planning to arrange a meeting for me to see a psychiatrist once she settles her financial issues so maybe then.

But I hope you find your answers and solutions to your predicament. : )

Nope but I'm bipolar. Think of me as a distant cousin. Talk to me.

Lucky you. I find that marijuana exacerbates it. It's a shame because I used to love it.

That is a problem. I have to take someone with me every time I go to a doctor because I get treated terribly. They always think that I am making something up.

I strongly suspect that my mom has it because everything I've read about it describes her behavior exactly. She is extremly emotionally unbalanced and has a very black and white view on things, and she is very controlling of everyone especially her boyfriends and husbands.

I don't think my Mom will ever be diagnosed because she likes to believe there is nothing wrong with her and that it's everybody else in the world who has a problem. Even though I love her and I know she loves me I always feel like i have to walk on eggshells around her because doing anything she doesn't approve of can set her off. I don't think it's been good on my sanity though, especially having Aspergers which seems to make it easier for her to control and manipulate me.

(Raises her hand.)
It feels like i'm on this crazy rollercoaster ride, every single day. And i can't get off it. My feelings go from one extreme to the other. I can go from super over the top happy, to suicidal-depressed in an hour time, revert back to happy. It goes up, down, left, right, all over the place. For no reason, out of nowhere. I never know what i'll feel. I'm extremely emotionly unbalanced. On 'good days' i feel calm or extremely happy all day long. I don't know who i am or what i want. My thoughts keep shifting. My tastes, likings, everything keeps changing. It's like i have two different sides on me. It's fustrating. It's seriously interfering with my life. In relationships, i'm just plain crazy. I'm a terrible person... I don't know how my exes put up with me.

This is exactly like my mom. I'm also suspecting she has Borderline. But no, everyone else in the world has a problem, never her. Everyone has some kind of disorder/something wrong with them/not normal. She is perfectly fine. And with my aspergers, its easy to put the blame on me. If she has it, it would be pretty funny. I always said my personality is half my dads, half my moms. Since my dad has Aspergers, my mom having Borderline would explain alot.

Have you tried a mood stabilizer. I am on Lamictal and have found that it does a pretty good job of controlling those intense shifts.

Some notes about Borderline PD:

It's egosynthonic: you don't notice your problems or you don't see them as problems, you have little "insight" most of the time.

it's overdiagnosed

It's over self diagnosed, and I'm always skeptical

It's arguably the worst PD you can get save Antisocial PD

It's the first time I run into the notion that people diagnose themselves with BPD. I'm surprised to hear about it.

People do it alllllll the time. I think they just want to say some thing is wrong with them so they seem more interesting or some thing silly like that.

I was diagnosed as bi-polar in my early teens and given meds for it. When I turned 18 I was dropped from my dads health insurance and could no longer see the docs. I went un-medicated until I was 23. I researched bi-polar all those years and it just never ever seemed right. About a month after my 23rd birthday I had an epic cutting episode and went to the hospital. I hadn't had a bath in over a week, I was wearing 3day old dirty pjs, and had 300+ cuts on my body. I told them I was done. I was kept for the longest 4days of my life and released after much observation. I was then sent to the local office of my state mental health center.... More observation. They decided I was not bi-polar. I got the new diagnoses of BPD and Major Depressive Disorder. I was so happy to have a name for it.
(Sorry I rambled on about myself for a min.. I don't typically do that.)

With so much information on the internet about every topic under the sun, it's not unusual for people with problems to self-dx. Especially if they have a crappy doctor or no doctor at all if they lack health care insurance.

I have read so much on the internet about various mental health disorders, I discovered I could be diagnosed with several disorders, including Borderline, Schizoid Personality Disorder [especially the 'secret schizoid'], paranoid personality disorder, some antisocial personality disorder symptoms. I just gave up. Psychiatry is not an exact science. I see mental health problems as a set of coping mechanisms, which, after having served their purpose, continue being used in a persons life when it's no longer necessary. It's a set of reactive behaviors and feelings that reflect a world that's gone mad.

As far as DX'ing oneself to get attention: A person could certainly do better than choosing BPD. BPD are misunderstood by friends and family, the mental health community [think of it as the mental health dx that makes everyone roll their eyes. It's the 'drama' disorder.]

I can relate to the days without bathing, messy house, some minor hoarding. I tried cutting one time just to see what the hub bub was all about. Not for me. Pain hurts. I have learned to cope with my relationship issues so classic with those who have BPD by not being social. Solitude, while making my life quite a bit less rich and lonely at times, is far better than the pain of involvement at this point in my life. I might have the polar opposite of BPD. There is a book on Borderline called, "I hate you, please don't leave." If they wrote a book about me it would likely be titled, "I love you, get the hell away."

I haven't tried a mood stabilizer yet. I was on prozac for the past 2 years, it really helped me alot with alot of things. But it stopped working for me. Now i'm going through withdrawal. I'm planning to try mood stabilizers when i'm completely off it.