Pychosis

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Since a few weeks I am learning to live with psychotic 'emotions' but without taking drugs. Not something that I would recommend to anyone in this forum but my experience shows that it works provided one's environment has been briefed properly. As we drove to a restaurant this evening my son observed light psychotic 'things'. Indeed more empathy, more interest from my side to listen, means positive behaviour.

What takes time and effort is to get the negative behaviour in check with all the consequences due to the environment pushing back. Meditation does not help. Compassion like listening Haendel's Sarabande is for me the best medicine. Normally I should take 100mg Seroquel per day. Now nothing. Every day is a blessing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Js3y6ouy1rQ

Yes I had a verylong psychosis episode for years. It was not severe because I could function. It was a schizophrenic break after I saverely abused DXM from cough medicine. At the same time horrible bullying and evil issues were unfolding at my university, so my psychosis got progressively worse frm having tactile sensations and occasionally seeing satan in peoples faces, to voices nagging me all night long. I thought these were people talking about me all the time. At the same time this all was happening, I was being sexually harassed and groomed for sex by several of my male professors. Everyone blamed me for being groomed for the sex,, which never happened mind you. ....calling me a psychopath, people ididnt even know, people walking past me calling me "he she and they" IT WAS A NIGHTMARE.
By that time, last fall I met my best friend and her bf introduced me to cannabis. I think it was laced because I had a 4 hour schizophrenic episode on it which i had synesthesia (i saw music and i saw taste, and nothing tasted 'good' becaus it tasted like a fractal. try to wrap your mind around that one), believed they were going to murder me, believed they were experimenting on me, heard their voices of their subconscious talking bad about me, several times i blacked out mentally and became catatonic, and i became a fractal, i was launching into The Jaunt....... by the summer i was going to an internship program where the professor working there was openly grooming me and it tortured me inside, i could not eat, i could not sleep, i was snorting heroin, and i was having psychotic full episodes like when i was smoking weed. ***long breeath*** THEN i was FINALLY admitted to the mental hospital, got treatment, but because i was being withdraw from klonopin i got ANOTHER episode by the end of staying there where i was so ddisorganized i could nto speak clearly or tie my shoes and everything was time dilation.......so all in all i guess ive had all possible combinations of schizophrenic episodes including the catatonic episodes.....ok anyways enough rambling...
a i developed psychosis because of drugs and a sh***y college environment. and yes it was ucf and yes im pissed off still. and no im not really autistic or schizophrenic. i just keep getting these god damn labels all the time.
i am now clean since may and i have escaped the hellish environment of the university and work a good job around good people. so i have pretty much fully recovered.

well thats my story of psychosis

edit: also this is my opinion of cannabis. i dont personally like it. it is interesting for vision quests if you have schizophrenic tendencies. it is very very mind opening. i would actually like to try other plants like this for that reason. then again, while i am working it is like playing russian roulette to my brain if i try to smoke cannabis. now that im not psychotic and taking antipsychotics, id probaly recover just fine from a night of smoking the stuff.

I have experienced some form of psychosis, and I've wondered what's the cause. Although I was aware lack of sleep was a significant factor of it, I hadn't realized just how much of a role it played in causing psychosis until after this weekend.
I had gone to a three day music festival and was either walking, dancing, or moshing pretty much the entire time. Hardly slept. When I arrived back, I could tell the visual aspects of psychosis were much stronger then at any other point in time. Especially after I had done both alcohol and cannabis (not at the same time, there was a span of a day in between). Prefer the psychosis I felt on marijuana; it is a hallucinogenic in itself, right? I will say this though . . . this is directed at anti-marijuana users here; the hangover (and psychosis during said hangover) I felt after drinking was considerably worse than any other psychosis I've felt thus far.

I was psychotic for more than three weeks, I believed that I had come across some major discovery, that sleep was unnecessary and that I could reprogram my mind to allow me to do whatever I wanted.

I sometimes wonder if I was a case of Very-Early Onset Schizophrenia.

I was more social when I was very young, after starting school, I withdrew socially, developed a much stronger tendency towards the negative symptoms. A year or two later I started seeing things. At night things seemed to twist and become horrifying images. I believed that aliens were trying to kill me, and were stalking my family. I couldn't go outside at night because they were waiting for me. I believed my dreams were visions from past lives, that I was sent by god, that I was an angel on a mission. I saw ghosts and could speak with the dead. I heard voices insulting me, and telling me to do things. I believed I could control the weather. I'd feel and smell things that weren't there. Etc etc.

This went on years, and I grew more and more depressed. My parent's denied that there was anything wrong with me at all. When my only friend died, I was hearing her voice for months after. I did terribly at school, and eventually tried to kill myself.

As I approached the age of 16, my hallucinations and delusions started fading away. I'd get them less and less. Now I only experience either very rarely.

I should have been hospitalized honestly...