Apathy depression lack of motivation. (help)

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I've seen a few others here struggled with apathy and depression and I wonder how you have coped. What strategies you have applied to aliveate it?

My depression stems from my recent divorce, hardly ever seeing my son, loosing my job and general lack of any form of success in life.
I've had about 30 different jobs most of which I have been fired from or quit because I was unable to keep up or was so bored that I was driven nearly to suicide.

After my recent diagnosis I'm awaiting social benefits, which amounts to about 30130$ a year. So I can start looking for an apartment and finally move out of my parents home.

what makes matters worse is my inability to get over my ex, failing as a father, my parents arguing and me trying to look after my mentally ill sister who is running amok.


I have friends, a girlfriend and a lover (open relationship ) and I have more than my basic needs met.

However I just feel no zest for life just apathy and mind numbing boredom. Games, movies, drugs, alcohol and even sex doesn't seem to snap me out of this state. I used to be an artist and make paintings and prints I would sell at conventions, but with all the stress I just can't find the will nor motivation to be productive. It's very frustrating as making art is one of my main things.

Another factor is that I don't feel any gratification when completing a task or achieving anything. Nor do I have any intrinsic motivation to drive me onward.

Any advice on how I can feel enthusiastic about things again?

Keep trying. Do the things you used to enjoy in case you find yourself enjoying one again.

Consider getting medication.

Get outside everyday and/or take a vitamin d supplement.

Pass the time while you wait to feel a little bit better (with those mind-numbing activities you mention). (That works for me, because I seem to have some natural ups and downs untied to the world around me--I don't know how normal that is.)

Get some, but not too much, social interaction.

Honestly the biggest step I've taken is simply to start seeing a psychiatrist. You can see a therapist if you have no interest in medication. It's been a huge step for me to open up about myself to a stranger. Often her comments are very eye-opening for me, I realize that I'm being irrational or too hard on myself. I might suggest keeping a journal near your bed as well. It's hard for me to make myself pick it up and start writing, but I always wind up working through something that's really been bothering me. If nothing else it can be very therapeutic. When I stress about things, it's always these little incomplete thoughts buzzing around my head driving me crazy. It helps to write them down on the page and to express why I'm worried or stressed. This way I get complete thoughts out and I can really pin down the specifics of the situation.
For me it is definitely not a substitute for speaking with a mental health professional, but it is a valuable addition to that. Hope this helped, even a little bit, and hope that you can start on a path to happiness. Remember that it's a life-long process.

I'm seeing a shrink, she mostly tells me to get over it and to get off my ass. I'm trying, but I keep falling on my ass again. Well atleast I'm getting back to my art again.

do you exercise?
physical exertion can help

I work out a few times a week, but not nearly enough, lost 60 pounds since winter.
Could eat a bit healthier I suppose. Just haven't had the energy for it.

have you grieved the loss of your wife?
accepted that it is over?

Trying, still cry myself to sleep sometimes even though its been a year now.
but I have a new girlfriend, I don't feel its right she should have to deal with this.
Uh I feel so pathetic. Acording to my shrink she says the aspergers makes it hard to let go of people.

the unresolved emotions of that can cause depression all by itself.

You don't say. :-/

Just keep on staying alive.

Get out of bed in the morning, make yourself do things, eat food, go to bed. Repeat. If you feel sad, then ignore it.

Eventually, everything will just blur together into one bleak smudge of thoughts and emotions, and you'll find a strange kind of peace.

This is the only thing you really can do.

Thank you so much for the support.
I'm doing somewhat better. I have a bunch of ideas and am nearly done renovateing my studio. I figured I needed a major attitude adjustment so I've been over at my girlfriends (who is actually a male to female trans) and gotten high for a week. It turns out I can't handle weed as well as I used to so I think I've had quite enough. Anyhow moraly questionable as it may seem It did help me relax and give me a proper system reboot so to speak. Speaking of self medication I've fund that ritalin does wonders for me, and I'm actually getting them legally from the doctors in a few weeks. I still struggle to keep the depression and apathy at bay mostly due to lack of energy and ongoing drama related to my ex, my sister and my girl/boyfriend.

Might I ask if anyone knows a good safe way to boost your energy?

As things are now I'm struggling just keeping up with household chores.

As always any help or advice is much appreciated, thank you.

A small thing, but something that might help you take the first steps away from extreme apathy is mindfulness. It's something I've learned through different mental health hospitalizations and outpatient programs. I find it helps with apathy because it forces you to be aware of and care about what's going on around you. Depending on what specific mindfulness exercise you do it can also help you get in touch with why you are feeling so low and help you find ways to fix it. You can look up mindfulness exercises online, but the most basic form of it is simply taking deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth as you clear your head, then after your head is clear (keep breathing) start focusing on everything in the room around you: note in your mind even the smallest details. Do not let yourself get distracted by thoughts or feelings while doing this, if you have a thought or feeling, simply take note of it and let it go on by for you to revisit later. I know this is easier said than done, but I hope it helps a little!

Thank you, I try to keep both a mindfulness and a daily meditation pratice. However it's easy to forget ones surroundings especially when stressed. I try to keep my awareness on the here and now as much as possible as I tend to make far less bad desitions that way.

You said you used to be an artist. I also paint at times. Maybe, you can start painting once again. You can draw the chair, the bed or whatever object is lying in your room /immediate surroundings. It will help you to focus. You can also draw an onion or a potato from your kitchen or a bar of chocolate. But you have to draw daily.
You can also start cooking-not fancy but basic dishes. It will improve your health and also help you to be mindful. The simple act of making a sandwich or pasta with fresh ingredients can also bring back some focus in your life but you have to do it daily.
I have encountered apathy so I can relate. I thought that I would never be able to get motivated again but I could do so. I started with cooking and now that I am regularly cooking, I am thinking of going back to painting. Simple acts like cooking,mopping floors,doing dishes are also a form of exercise. Getting enough sunlight and doing household chores will help you. Sometimes, it is the small things like doing dishes,cooking that bring back your motivation for life rather than big things like relationship, etc. etc. Hope you will get your motivation back soon.

I do exercise regularly although I have been rather sloppy the past month with seeing my mate and all.

I have been doing gardening for my gran wich takes about 2 hours.

I tend to have a set amount of energy. More than 3 hours strainious physical activity causes me to get really tired, drowzy, fall asleep of flat out pass out.

Exercizing more only makes me more tired.
Refusing to accept this weakness I passed out on top of a mountain after a 20 kilometer hike, and was sent to the hospital by the camp I was staying at at the time who feared I've had a heart attack.

To me very strainious physical activity is as painfull as beeing stabbed (wich I have been)
When I get tired I loose my sight and hearing making long periods of manual labor impossible. This sometimes leads to injury, wich I usually tend to disregard since I can't diferanciate between a broken limb or the over all pain of the physical activity itself.
I find it hard to beleive this condition is merly psychosomatic.
Any one ever experiance anything simmilar?

How is it possible to step on a nail, have it go an inch in to your foot or remove an axe chopped in to your leg and hardly feel it while strainious physical activity almost makes me buckle. It doesn't make sense.

Despite it beeing painfull I try to keep active, although not usually push myself to hard unless purposely exorcising.

I feel this condition is more disabeling than everything else that ales me and apart from losing my ex is the main cause of my depression although having a high pain tolerance for physical punishment is quite handy and saves me trips to the doctors since I have stitched up my own wounds when I've had accidents.

I'm not saying this to brag, merely stating facts. I'm incapable of feeling what you call pride or a sense of acomplishment, wich in turn contributes to my depression.

I really hate complaining, but wanted to ask for advice concerning this.

Anyhow enough bickering.

I'm getting an apartment in a month and will finally have a stable platform from which to build a new life from the ashes of my old one. I'm quite looking forward to decorating, setting things up and crafting my new home to my liking. Not to mention the freedom, doing as I please and not having to put up with my patents arguing., although I'm afraid of being alone.

I could use some advice on keeping my s**t together on my own.