I dont like taking my medication

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You should not let other people define who you are. If they dismiss you, that is their problem, not yours. And it is very likely that what you feel is valid, and NOT paranoia at all.

In John 7:20, Jews pretty much told Jesus he was paranoid, yet He wasn't. Since you have religious experiences, you might be going through the same thing. In Matt 7:13 Jesus said that most will go through wide gate that leads to disraction and only few will go through narrow gate that leads to life. So why would you trust majority's opinion then? Maybe you are one of the few, and you are the one who got it right.

On a more secular realm, geniuses like Galeleo and Einstein were labeled as crazy by their contemporaries, yet they turned out to be right. So if THEY were to go on meds, what a loss to science would that be.

I strongly encourage you to get off meds completely.

Bear in mind here, that some mental health conditions are out to trick you.

My cousin has bipolar. He is fine when he takes his meds, but the problem with being fine is he then thinks he doesn't need them. One or two missed doses and the manic phase starts - "See how much energy you have now! These tablets slow you down! Stop you achieving your true potential! Stop taking them, you are so much better free of medication!". And then the next thing you know he's fantasising about being an international DJ and travelling around the world on his non-existent yacht, and he blows money he doesn't have on fantasy schemes with shady "mates" who know he's vulnerable but are quite happy to rip him off.

And then he gets in trouble with his outrageous behaviour, dodgy mates and bad debts, there's a crisis, and then he's chronically depressed and back on the meds for 3 years until he gets straight. And then it starts all over again.

Be bloody careful as it's quite likely that's what is happening here. "You don't need the medication, it's dulling your perception. Listen to us, don't take the meds, we know more than the Doctors and your family do". Err no, it's a trap, don't fall into it.

And especially don't listen to people who have some sort of ill-thought-out moral stance on medication they've no experience of and have never needed to take.

So you are pretty much saying that being super-intelligent is useless because other people don't appreciate it? I strongly disagree with it. Other people didn't appreciate Galileo and Einstein. Yet look at how much they ended up appreciating them afterwords. Same goes for countless writers and poets, at least the Soviet ones: there is even a saying "Soviet Union loves the dead". Just think of what a huge loss would it be if all those people were to say that their intelligence is useless since people around them don't appreciate them and go on meds? What a huge loss to science and to art that would be!

Now, what should you do with your intelligence? The same thing they did. Develop a career in either science or art, start publishing your science/art. That will give your life some purpose and direction. As a side note, I don't understand how most people can go through their same routine day in and day out for years without one of those careers -- with or without meds. I realize its a different topic, but I guess they are related. If all you want in life is just make enough money to put a bread on the table, then I agree with you, you don't really need to be super intelligent for that. But then the life loses its purpose. But if you decide to add a purpose to life by making more meaningful career, then yes you very much will need an intelligence.

I realize you might not be quite ready for it. But why not leave this option for the future? What if 10 years from now you will start to see things differently and realize you do want to make one of those creative careers after all? And then you will regret that your brain will be damaged by all those meds. So you should stop taking the meds regardless of anything else you do, just to leave those options open.

That plus also the very idea of damaging something looks really bad, to me anyway. I saw just a few days ago one of the neighbors made a really interesting toy-house for his son, and he said that after few weeks he will burn it. I asked why would you want to burn it? And he said he doesn't know what else to do with it. And I said keep it! I don't like the idea of all this effort going to waste! He said he will think about it. I don't know if he said it just to be polite or if he will seriously think about it. But I honestly hope he keeps it. The idea of him burning it is devastating.

Now look at how much worse it is to burn your brain cells. A brain is far more intricate thing, far more elegant than that house. And you are burning it with those meds for nothing. Don't you think its sad if you look at it this way?

Bear in mind here, that some mental health conditions are out to trick you.

My cousin has bipolar. He is fine when he takes his meds, but the problem with being fine is he then thinks he doesn't need them. One or two missed doses and the manic phase starts - "See how much energy you have now! These tablets slow you down! Stop you achieving your true potential! Stop taking them, you are so much better free of medication!". And then the next thing you know he's fantasising about being an international DJ and travelling around the world on his non-existent yacht, and he blows money he doesn't have on fantasy schemes with shady "mates" who know he's vulnerable but are quite happy to rip him off.

And then he gets in trouble with his outrageous behaviour, dodgy mates and bad debts, there's a crisis, and then he's chronically depressed and back on the meds for 3 years until he gets straight. And then it starts all over again.

Be bloody careful as it's quite likely that's what is happening here. "You don't need the medication, it's dulling your perception. Listen to us, don't take the meds, we know more than the Doctors and your family do". Err no, it's a trap, don't fall into it.

And especially don't listen to people who have some sort of ill-thought-out moral stance on medication they've no experience of and have never needed to take.

Getting off medication is no guarantee you'll turn into the next Einstein, Galileo or Jesus.

My meds - the ones correctly prescribed, not the mismedication from the misdiagnosis - don't hinder my intelligence.
To the contrary: the meds that help me regulate my sleep and keep my anxiety and depression under control are very useful in keeping my intellectual abilities high. They're also very helpful for doing something productive with these abilities.

The reason your meds don't hinder your intelligence is that they are not anti-psychotic. The anti-psychotic meds would hinder intelligence, thats what they are designed to do.

Actually, the one I take for insomnia - quetiapine - is an antipsychotic that, used in small doses, shows very strong sleep inducing effect.

However: my main point is that the right medicine in right dose should not hinder a person's intellectual abilities. If medication makes you feel and function worse - especially long term - try changing your medication. There really is a choice and every organism reacts differently so seek what helps you.

In this case, logically, it has to hinder your brain function. Because antipsychotics are neuroleptics. If you look at the origin of the word "neuroleptic" what that word says is that it blocks the nerves in your brain. Well, if it blocks the nerves in your brain then, logically, it hinders brain function.

This is the flaw in your logic.
Not all activity of the brain improves its performance.
A brain can also simply generate noise.
So, if you give antipsychotics to a healthy brain, it would indeed hinder its intellectual abilities.
But psychotic symptoms are all about the brain generating overwhelming noise.
So anti-psichotics help psychotic brains. Quiet the noise down so useful thoughts get more room.

PS - I used generic "you" in my previous posts.

So, if you give antipsychotics to a healthy brain, it would indeed hinder its intellectual abilities.

But psychotic symptoms are all about the brain generating overwhelming noise.

But you said you are not psychotic. You were misdiagnosed. So what you just wrote above implies that your taking antipsychotic will hinder your abilities.

Paranoia is not noise because its not random. Maybe disorganized symptoms of schizophrenia could be viewed as noise but not the paranoid ones.

Besides, Crystal's only "evidence" that her thoughts are paranoid is that others view them as such. But maybe others just misunderstand her.

Seeing patterns and meanings in everything is one of possible forms of brain noise. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pareidolia Healthy brains do it all the time and psychotic brains can do way too much of it.

I'm concerned with it, too. I'd love to hear (read) how Crystal experiences them. Anxiety + pattern thinking + autism can be misinterpreted for paranoia from outside

In other cases (as we've seen posters on here demonstrating this) that paranoia interpretation is absolutely correct and generally it's a matter of how willing the person in question is willing to listen to others perspectives.

If the person in question has actually been the subject of conspiratorial abuse that's probably going to reinforce what is judged as paranoia, make them less willing to listen to others, form connections, etc. That paranoia has a rational basis but gets taken to an irrational length. Is it misinterpretation to view it as paranoia, or is it correctly interpreting?

Either way, the disconnection from others and their perspectives will reduce how interacting with others tends to regulate stuff like paranoia and excessive reliance on patterns that may or may not exist, which might make it a bit of a Catch-22.