How it's like developing schizophrenia?

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If it's someone here who got it, I would like know how it felt like developing it, the symptoms and how it changed you .. ?

I don't think anyone would know the moment the developed schizophrenia. They just learn at some point they have it and well maybe its hard to distinguish between reality and hallucinations.

There's some insight here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b0 ... _the_Head/

People develop schizophrenia in two distinct ways. Gradually or suddenly. For people experiencing the former type of onset, I can only speculate that they cannot pinpoint how the transition took place. For the latter type of onset, I can perhaps speak from personal experience:

The transition lasted approximately two days. I would describe it as the most intense and terrifying experience of my life. It involved the loss of the Self and as a result, I was feeling great amounts of anxiety and terror. It was as if I was continuously trying to re-acquire my sense of Self or rather desperately not losing grips of it. My speech appeared non-sensical to others to whom I could not convey the magnitude of the mental torture I was living. It felt like I was going to stay this way forever and absolutely felt the urge to commit suicide, not out of desperation and loss of hope but to stop this craziness. The transition suddenly halted after two days but I was now in a different state of mind, one which has been present ever since I can remember that day. Note that the onset is quite distinct from a psychotic episode.

If it involves losing touch from reality than I am thinking I might be screwed....

It is difficult to describe. It concerns the sense of Self. If you picture a line where point A is a full sense of Self and point B is a total loss of the sense of Self, then I would be lying somewhere in between but never static. It would be more or less stable during periods of recovery and mental stability, whereas very fluctuant in the midst of a psychotic episode. There is a good amount of literature on the relationship between schizophrenia and the ego, which I believe is more of a fundamental characteristic of the disorder rather than the simplistic mainstream psychiatric description of it as a list of symptoms.

Sweetleaf: it does not involve losing touch with reality. This happens mostly in a psychotic episode. If you're finding yourself hiding in your room because, for example, you believe some governmental agency is out there to kill you, then you should be alarmed. But in either case, you're never screwed. Unless what you're suffering from is a degenerative disorder (even that is incorrect: stephen hawking), there is always a way out.

This is like there's a TV, and noone's watching?

The weaker your sense of self the more blurred is the unconscious boundary you draw between yourself and the world.

Just joined up, thought I'd share my opinion, forgive me if it seems like a ramble, I missed my meds and didn't haven't slept in about 23 hours.

I was first diagnosed with childhood onset schizohphrenia somewhere between 2nd - 4th grade, I don't remember exactly seeing as how my old psych never garnered the balls to tell me to my face. Roughly 16-18 years ago. I remember being different, quick to anger, quick to beat someone down. But to your question, my world started falling apart around 17 years old. I remember after getting my GED that I would sit in bed at night and go from being pissed, to being depressed, thoughts racing and what not. I think my friends starting realizing I was a little crazy back in middle school, I was arrested twice for assault on a student/teacher. Um... before I lose my train of thought overall my life in the last 7 years is complete and utter s**t, other than going back to school for automotive technology and averaging a 3.0GPA after 2 classes. My grandmother whom raised me and I live with for 20 years passed away in march from complications from radiation treatment. I held her hand for close to an hour and watched her die. When she was first waiting to be diagnosed I remember I was out in the garage back in Jan, doing laundry and getting ready for class, I looked over at the steps after closing the dryer and saw a shadowy black hand come out from under the steps. Back to the progression... I have completely isolated myself from the outside world despite being able to hide alot of things from the general public. When I first started my current job in march 2011 my co-workers would f**k with me and call me a ret*d, so one day I sat them down and told them my diagnoses and they were surprised, but they stopped fing with me none the less...

Anyways... My life over the past 7 years has been one huge bottle of untamed emotions, suffering and perpetual BS.

EDIT: LOL sweetleaf from MYB is on here? Get the f out.