Caring for a person with Bipolar Disorder

Post Reply New Topic

Hi,
I have a friend who is Bipolar and I have Aspergers syndrome and her mood changes quite rapidly and I was just wondering what is the best way to calm her down or help her relax?

Any help would be most appreciated.

Hmm intresting, Yes I do to have a friend and yes she is bipolar too, perhaps the best way you can accept and adapt with her is to let her be her own self.

^this

i am glad she has a friend like you that cares like that, they come in short supply...in my experience. anyway i am bi-polar. i dont know how much you know bout the condition, but here goes.. i get a general feeling of unhappy instability if i go 16 hours without swallowing my medication. bi-polar disorder is a condition with long phases (up to 6-8 months for me) of depression and mania, with daily moods that fluctuate at the slightest event. i feel these moods very deeply, and focusing on other things can be difficult (probably has to do with my mono-processing sensory information too) these moods don't really have anything to do with mutual emotion and other people, so there's nothing to be done. it's as if im swept away to heaven or hell by a tidal wave. thank god for lithium. i should probably go swallow some now.

I have a sister who is bipolar, in a way I suppose it's a ying yang match up, ie when we are together she can socially interact at a level that someone with AS couldn't possibly match, while on the other side I can then provide a logical calmer presense. I would say the main thing to do is stay in their company when ever they're are going through an extreme mania or depressive time.

I have Bipolar Disorder, and I can tell you that everyone is different about what soothes them. Also, there's not a quick fix or a switch that can end a bad mood period. Listening and not judging is a great way to help, but keep in mind that depression isn't something we can shut off. It's going to be there, lingering.

I find that I prefer time alone to think about what is bothering me, to see if it's really upsetting me or if it's my chemical imbalance. This doesn't mean I want to be alone physically really. My husband will usually wait a while before coming to sit with me, then he listens while I babble or rant. Ranting helps me to get my thoughts in order, or help me to put things in perspective. I still have the depression, but I feel less alone when I feel heard and loved.

Also, try not to offer ways to fix what is bothering your friend--often, this can cause more upset. It's weird. I'm not sure why, but females especially don't want advice on fixing their problems, they just want to be heard and to have their feelings validated rather than brushed off as moodiness. Encourage your friend to open up to you and then just listen, saying things like "You're right to feel that way" and "I'm here for you".

Remember that you can't necessarily help end the depression, but you can offer your unconditional support.

nicely said HisLady

lol.

I have aspergers and bi-polar. Best way to call me down when im upset is to sit alone writing for an hour or two, or drawing. Sharing my issues with other people seems far less efective. for me atleast

I have both Bipolar and Aspergers. For someone with Bipolar who's in a rage, the best thing to do sometimes is to just listen. You can't reason with them when they're in that state of mind. If your friend is angry or upset, don't argue or give suggestions, just listen to everything she says. After a while, she may calm herself down. This doesn't always work though. I've had times when I was in such a rage that nothing anything did could penetrate it. I screamed and screamed and even hit myself in an effort to get some of my anger out before I exploded. The only thing my mom could do was put headphones on me and play soft, soothing music. After a while, I calmed down. That's what works for me. You'd have to find what works for her. Maybe just ask her what she would want you to do when she's upset. She'd probably know better than anyone else

Have you asked her?

For me, it's self-talk. I get scared of things easily and it sets me off with a violent mood swing. I need to be in a calming home and just no noise at all.

Also in a manic phase, I need people to be with me. But not talk too much. I need calm.

The best thing you can do is roll with it and try to divert her energy and attention to other things if necessary. If things get bad, try to get her to arrange her days to be around other friends and relatives most of the time to keep her from being alone. I would not recommend risking breaking your trust with her and going to her relatives without her blessing unless the situation reaches crisis point.