Depression unbearable when your mind isn't occupied
I assume that this is the correction section to put something depression related in but if I'm wrong I apologize.
I've tried to explain this to a couple of people (when necessary) but nobody gets it. I've been very depressed for the latter half of my life. If I can immerse myself in some project that I'm using my mind for (like reading, writing, technical activities) I'm not focusing on it. It's not like I'm not depressed but I can keep myself from thinking about it consistently.
However when I need to do something like clean, organize, etc I find it difficult to not quit after a few minutes and sit on the floor crying or just thinking about how awful everything is. I've been worse the last month & a half since my dog died. I've basically thrown myself into doing things online most of my waking hours.
I really need to get all of my stuff organized. Luckily I can't stand dirty stuff so it's not like I have plates or anything sitting around. I try to throw away or wash stuff like that ASAP. I'm mentioning that because another person that I know lets those build up in their bedroom when upset. But everything is just in disarray and I can't find anything. I don't know what to do though.
I'm actually going to see a psychiatrist soon & my therapist is all excited ("ooh, they'll give you antidepressants") but I already know from experience/research that depression medicine just makes me blank. I certainly don't get anything accomplished as all I want to do is sleep. It doesn't make you happy. In fact after the blankness my depression just breaks through anyway. Plus I feel worse cuz I have a harder time with my body.
I've been like that for about a year. I've broken out of it twice when it got really really intense and then just stopped, and I had a couple of days where I could do anything, and sleep well, and feel warm and stuff. I'm not sure how to make it go intense deliberately. Making it false with anti-depressants isn't a good solution for me.
daydreamer84
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Joined: 8 Jul 2009
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,001
Location: My own little world
Happening to me right now. This happens to me something like every 18 months or so. It used to be constant but I requested an SSRI (Zoloft to be more specific) and that helped a lot. Although this sort of nagging depression seems to still come around once every so often. Ever since I started medicating though, the anxiety pretty much disappeared, which was pretty important me. I'd rather be depressed than anxious tbh.
I thought the holidays would be happy but well.. the moment semester break started for me, I sunk down in terms of my mood.
I am taking my medications as I always would and trying to keep occupied. I rode my bike yesterday and took a long walk today, but in essence, I am basically gonna just wait it out. For me at least, it usually passes in 2-3 weeks.
So... the advice I can give you is that if you're on medications, keep taking them and just wait it out. And do what you are doing now, talk about it. That's the only reason I am here, talking helps. Best wishes and happy holidays.
Yes, I'm exactly like this if I'm not doing something like reading on the internet, I get extremely depressed. Running, driving, and energy drinks also help cure my depression. I really want to see a psychiatrist; unfortunately it's something I cannot afford. There are many different types of antidepressants: SSRIs, SNRIs, Tricyclics, and MAOIs. SSRIs seem to be the favorite of psychiatrist to prescribe due to low side effects. However, trycyclics and MAOIs are much more effective at treating depression and are less likely to produce the zombie effect. If I were you, I'd ask about about receiving a different class of antidepressants. This ,of course, is assuming you have only took SSRIs.
However when I need to do something like clean, organize, etc I find it difficult to not quit after a few minutes and sit on the floor crying or just thinking about how awful everything is.
I am the same way. If I have a project I can become totally involved in it seems to channel my mind and emotions away from the depression. For instance this past Spring I initiated several home improvement projects, some of which were outdoors doing landscaping. These were things that needed to be done, and were not over the top, just necessary repairs and improvements. During this time I was basically free of the depression that permeates my soul incessantly.
It is now winter in the American Midwest, and I don't schedule any major projects for the month of December because of all the additional work Christmas requires. It turns out that Christmas really depresses me, and without a project I am collapsing into tears regularly. Everyday there is a reminder of just how awful my life has become.
I tried anti depressants for over a decade and found that they make me worse. In addition to the annoying dry mouth and sexual dysfunction, they also caused me to become mildly agitated. I stopped using them in 2006. I have been able to take the edge off the depression without psychotropic medications by using full spectrum lighting, and various supplements like Omega3 and lithium orotate. It isn't perfect, but neither were the medications. At least now the side effects are better heart health and lower blood pressure!
I need and like a clean and well organized home. I keep mine that way by telling myself that I am allowed to cry so long as I get the work done.
_________________
"Dogs have owners, Cats have staff"
Aspie Score: 137 out of 200
Neurotypical Score: 67 out of 200
Diagnosed "genuis, borderline autism" at the age of 24 months
Level 1 Autism DSM-V
what i noticed is that, there are two things to do for depression.
relief it with pleasurable activities, and then it comes back biting you even worse.
or work it by socializing, being healthy, educating urself, which in turn reduces it.
but then again, sometimes depression just bad that it just numbs me.
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