The world is starting to move. (Mild hallucinations?)

Post Reply New Topic

The world has never looked to me the way I understand most people see it, but lately it's getting stranger. Nothing sits still. Everything always looks like it's moving somehow. If I stare at anything for a few seconds, it starts to warp. Curved lines start to twist and spin. Straight ones slide back and forth. The grass and dirt on the ground slide around like they're made of goo. A pattern of dots seems to expand and contract like it's breathing.

None of this is extreme, frightening, or distressing. The movements are very small and not permanent. It's similar to the mild visual effects that can accompany a psychedelic trip (though I haven't had one of those in close to a year now). If I blink, everything returns to its starting position then slowly starts to move again. Actually it's kind of beautiful sometimes. I wish I could find a way to express it artistically.

More than anything it feels like my dreams are leaking into my waking life. Reality is becoming less stable. Aside from these little movements, I also keep seeing things out of the corner of my eye. Usually I see a person standing there, but when I look, they're gone. There's nothing there that might have been mistaken for a person, either. When I close my eyes for any period of time I start to see things in my mind's eye like a dream, even though I'm fully awake.

It's not any kind of psychosis for sure. I know this is all in my head. Just makes me wonder what the hell is going on in there that's making my perception change so much.

For the record, I have plenty of experience with derealization (which causes similar things), but I don't feel derealized lately. I know that feeling very well and this isn't quite it. It's true that I'm stressed lately and that quite possibly is contributing to these little things I'm seeing, but this is just... different from what's happened before. I wish I could talk to someone about it, but I have a feeling most of the people in my life would just call me crazy.

Unless this becomes a dizzying experience, so much that you can barely walk (surely, though, that couldn't be the default state for a person?) - I suppose, like when one is drunk, then I assume it's fine - especially if you think it's beautiful.

As you mention that you experienced psychedelics in the past then it may be HPPD... do you also have visual snow? That's usually the basis of HPPD. The key is with anxiety, though - if seeing people in the periphery of your sight scares you (à la paranoia) then it's negative, but if not then it's merely psychological phenomena.

If you want to talk to someone I'm always available... and I certainly wouldn't think for an instance that any of this is craziness.

I don't think I get any of this visual snow, although a quick read through the wikipedia link you gave does indeed sound like what I've got going on, and that shifting purple image is quite like what I see when I look at the ground.

From the list of symptoms given in the beginning, I have halos, trails, color shifts (this is the only one causing me any distress - I teach little kids and sometimes it's necessary to distinguish between shades of something or identify if something has changed color or not!), illusion of movement in static objects/settings, distorted dimensions, and definitely heightened awareness of floaters. I spent about 4 months intensely exploring a substance that probably is best left unnamed on a public web site (though I don't mind giving details in private). All experiences were wonderful except the last one, which was nightmarish (my life was in danger and those responsible for me abandoned me). I took a break then tried again two months later but again with negative results, so I decided to leave it for now and hopefully go back to it in the future. That was nearly 6 months ago. I have regularly experienced visual abnormalities since then. At first it was very distressing because I thought my mind was "broken" and would never go back to normal. (There were also emotional and psychological issues during this period that caused a lot of problems, but those seem to have gone away.) The visual issues seemed to go away for a while, but over the past couple weeks they've come back strong. I've just sort of been enjoying it so far. Definitely no anxiety. Someone suggested I was having flashbacks, but I knew that couldn't be true because this is very long-term. I had never heard of HPPD. Sounds about right.

Hopefully it won't start causing any big problems. It's mostly only noticeable when I look at something for a few seconds or longer - waiting for a train or bus, or standing outside with the kids at my school while they play, things like that. I do sometimes have trouble reading lately, though, which could be problematic in the long run. The letters tend to jump or shake a bit and it's easy to lose my place, especially if I'm reading from a computer.

I've posted in my blog with some more information about what I'm experiencing and my history with psychedelics, in case anyone is interested.

http://crowdedhead.blog.com/2012/11/17/ ... is-moving/

I get that as well, tends to be rather unpleasant and a bit too overwhelming if I get anxious...otherwise it can just be somewhat entertaining. I ate lots of psychedelic mushrooms when I was 20 in a rather short period of time and have only done that a couple times since then....but it wasn't really that enjoyable. Then there's the acid, though the last time I attempted tripping on that it ended up being rather bogus as all whatever it was did was make me extra paranoid about nothing no cool visuals or anything like that.

So it could potentially be HPPD, don't know though as it could relate to lack of sleep or other things as well.

That doesn't sound like acid. Maybe you got a bad batch. Do you know what type it was? What form was it (paper, liquid, etc.)? If it was papers, do you remember what the picture was?

Anyway I'm not sure if it's okay to talk about drugs on this forum... Does anyone know for sure how the rules are regarding that? There's not a "forum rules" thread for this section. I don't want to offend anyone or stir up any controversy. I'm happy to continue the conversation privately or in another place where it might be more acceptable, though. Or if someone can confirm that it's ok in this forum?

It was on some sort of candy thing so I imagine liquid or something put on there, but yeah it wasn't at all like the first time...haven't been able to find any on paper and I haven't really been looking as it would probably be a terrible idea in my current state.



And I don't think its a huge issue, so long as you don't put a bunch of specific details about things you have or where you get such things but I believe talking about experiences with drugs is allowed especially if it relates to the topic which I'd think it does in this thread.

I only had the liquid once (couple of drops in a cup of water) and although it was different and less visual than the papers, there was still plenty of visual effect. It can very pretty wildly (I've had one type that had very little visual effect) but it's also possible you could have gotten something bad or fake. Actually I liked the liquid a lot better because I wasn't doing it for the visual effects but for the emotional/mental/psychological journey, which was much more intense with pure liquid. The papers were very strong and highly visual so I used them a lot for art.

Anyway, yes, it is definitely relevant to the issue at hand. It is getting annoying now and then. It's pretty mild unless I get stressed, but then it's starting to give me headaches. Just a few minutes ago I was checking a bread roll to make sure it hadn't gone moldy (had it for a few days) and I realized I couldn't tell. The surface of the bread was uneven and multicolored and it wouldn't sit still well enough for me to see if there were any little mold spots on it.

I've never done any drug that could cause HPPD, but I still find the idea of mild HPPD fun! It would make the world more interesting (provided I can drive and always know how things really are.) However, severe HPPD would likely ruin my life! I don't know how I'll hold down a job while essentially in a permanent state of mushroom tripping...

That being said I have no way of getting any illegal drugs besides marijuana.

What you are describing sounds a lot like different migraine aura effects I get. I used to get common migraines with the headache and no aura, but now, I mostly just get the visual auras with no headache. If you research migraine visual auras you will probably find some similar descriptions, but there is an enormous amount of variety in how they appear. I don't always get the same ones, but I have seen the effects you describe at different times. I also see "visual snow" to various degrees which sometimes worsens to the point of being an aura on its own. I also have neurally mediated hypotension which seems to tie into my migraines in some way. I've never used hallucinogenics so it's not a residual effect. However I have noticed that certain things which affect my blood pressure also change the nature and frequency of the auras and visual snow, when I'm especially symptomatic with a lot of blood pressure drops the visual effects get more noticeable. I almost never got auras until last year when I started treating the blood pressure condition... then, my horrible migraines went away and now I get the auras. The auras are better, but the effect can be alarming the first time or if you don't know what it is.

In terms of closing my eyes and being able to see pictures as if dreaming, this is fairly normal for me. As I understand it some people think in visual terms and some don't. To those who don't, this sounds fairly bizarre when I describe it. To other visual thinkers it seems to sound normal. I've also read about some people who are not visual thinkers and don't see things "in pictures," except when they are having a migraine aura.

Have you been to an eye doctor? Those can be signs of a detaching retina.