Worried I am becoming insane

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Lately I feel I am doing and thinking things that are utterly insane. Like I keep thinking objects are alive, but it is worse than that. I keep thinking things like crumbs on the floor are ''alive''. Like at work if the rooms look like they don't need vacuuming at all but just have one or two crumbs on the floor, I pick one up and put it in the bin, then if I see some smaller crumbs near it I have to pick them up too and put them in the same bin, because otherwise I think that the two little crumbs were the big crumb's two children and that it will be crying alone if it doesn't get it's two ''children'' crumbs in the bin with it (even though realistically the crumbs will separate once gone in the bin anyway). Yes I KNOW it sounds weird and crazy and stupid, but I don't know what causes this. I think it might be from too much empathy with hearing on the news about people losing loved ones, and I'm not there to see how devastated they feel and I probably don't know the half because obviously it has never happened to me (this goes the same with anyone).

And with food. If I am cooking something like pasta and then drain the water away in a sieve and then lose one pasta in the sink, I hate it. I get a horrible pain in my stomach and really want it to be eaten like all the others, but after it falls into the sink I know it wouldn't be very healthy to eat it. So sometimes I get another pasta from the saucepan to be thrown away in the bin with it so that it's not alone. But then I think the other pasta in the pan are yelling, ''no, don't you go!''

And you can just imagine how I felt when eating gummy bears last week......

Why do I keep feeling like this? It makes me feel crazy. Why won't my mind shut up and just stop making me believe that these things have thoughts and feelings? Is it due to depression, anxiety and isolation mixed in one?

I don't think your crazy. I think your a little bit childlike in your perception of things. but if it causes you stress then maybe you should see somebody.

I wonder if you are afraid of losing someone close to you or afraid of being alone. Maybe it is a side effect of a medication. In the 1970s, I took some medication that made things immensely sad to me. I could not block out or tone down the awareness of the massive suffering of some creatures. I got a grip on dealing with it when I went off the meds.