social anxiety and how to help this girl that has it?

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So, I am the captain of my college's basketball team and there is this player that is extremely shy. For instance, when she says something she apologizes for it, like: "could you please tell me where the bathroom is...? sorry if I am disturbing you!". I am pretty sure she has social anxiety, and when I compare myself (shy) to her (social anxiety) I think this is clear. In a practice she accidentally hurt her foot, then all the other players went there to help her. She got so nervous for becoming the center of attention she threw up and almost passed away (got really pale and dizzy).
What should I do about this situation? I want to help her.
Also should I tell her I suspect she has social anxiety and that she should search for a psychologist? I think she could benefit a lot from a psychologist's help since this clearly has a great impact in her life quality, but I don't know how to address it.
I thought about sending her the Liebowitz scale http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/disorder/liebowitz/, but this seems kind of abrupt, doesn't it?
anyone here suffer from social anxiety?

Give her some self confidence. Tell her to stop apologizing. Face her, and tell her to not ever apologize to you ever again. Tell her it is o.k., and she can say anything to you that she wants. Loose the fear, and the anxiety dissapates. Pills help too.

Psychologist is the best bet.

It could be anxiety or it could be the effects of childhood abuse.

Either way a proffessional is best at identifying and helping her. All you can do is be her friend and suggest she visit the psychologist.

What the above poster said is the worst you can do imo. You don't come up to someone like that and tell them to grow a pair and deal with it (no matter how nicely/kindly you put it).

I think that if I tell her her behavior is inappropriate and never to apologize to me again she would get even more anxious.

Dantac, but how do I tell her to see a psychologist? How to start this conversation? And I don't want to imply there is something wrong with her.
also is there a way of raising her confidence?

What she says is not inappropriate. It is courteous. She doesn't need to grow a pair either. She can be herself.

She IS being herself. The point is, you can't just go up to a person like this and tell her to stop being herself because you & the world consider her behavior undesirable. It doesn't matter what you think or see things, what matters is what SHE sees and thinks.



You could mention to her that she seems nervous and insecure around people...share with her your own experiences (AS has similar socializing issues) and that if she wants you could suggest a psychologist to help her with the anxiety issues... and that you're willing to listen to her if she wants to talk about it.

Since you do not know why she has anxiety its best to not try to raise her confidence..you could do more harm than good. A childhood abuse victim will respond differently to a confidence boosting attempt than someone who has social anxiety due to some chemical imbalance in the brain or genetic condition.

You both are arguing the same point, it seems.

I'd leave the poor girl alone. If someone told me I needed a shrink, no matter how well meaning, the results would not be pretty.

Last edited by MjrMajorMajor on 20 Apr 2014, 11:37 am, edited 1 time in total.

Indeed, she sounds polite and we'll spoken.

She sounds polite and shy. Don't tell her to go to the psychologist. She might be offended someone she doesn't know much is telling her to go to a psychologist, due to the social stigma that people that go to the psychologist are crazy. I would get offended myself.

Just let her know you know she is a bit shy, and that she can reach out to you whenever she needs, and that it doesn't bother you to help her.