Anxiety About Learning New Things as A Kid?

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How common is it for kids to have anxiety over learning new things?

I remember being afraid of wetting myself when I was 3 and being potty trained. It was so bad that I would sleep while sitting on the toilet!

I also remember having anxiety over learning how to ride a bike without training wheels. My biological father kept pressuring me to learn while refusing to help and watch me just in case I fell. I was so afraid of falling and getting hurt that I gave up on learning how to ride a bike.

I haven't really heard of other people having these kinds of experiences, so I was curious if it was common or not. Have any of you had experiences like this?

Actually, it's very common for a three-year-old to be anxious about wetting his/her pants--but not to the extent where he/she has to sit on the toilet so long that he/she falls asleep.

It's also common for a kid to be anxious about riding a bike without training wheels for the first time. What kind of father doesn't help his little girl with riding a bike?

So my anxiety about wetting myself was extreme? My mom told me she kept trying to get me to sleep in bed, but I kept going to the toilet to sleep. I was very afraid of wetting the bed without a diaper.

An abusive father doesn't help his little girl with riding a bike.

I don't know if it's extreme--but it's certainly indicative of anxiety.

I know it's hard--but you should really try to think to the future rather than dwell too much on the past. Yep...not a good dad. But many people who are abused make up for it by being GOOD parents.

I tried to avoid learning things due to my OCD & anxiety over making mistakes.

Extreme for NT standards. Much more common and therefore much less extreme for kids with Asperger.
I think that some children with Asperger might feel really very uncomfortable with wet pants, and (maybe more?) with finding out all of a sudden that wetting pants is not O.K.? The first might have to do with sensory issues and the second with a) not developing an idea before potty training that there might be some after-diaper period, b) difficulties with adjusting to new things plus c) reacting stronger to a not even necessarily very strong annoyance of your mother or of a kindergarten nurse than an NT toddler would.

BTW, in Germany there is a so-called "diaper-baby" forum (http://www.wb-community.com) with adult people who enjoy having diapers without actually needing them, and someone asked others to make an aspie test: 50% of the people participating in the survey were on the spectrum.


I would not call a dad who does not help with the actually quite big a transition "abusive", just (maybe too) busy with other things and - most important - not very well at imagining the big trouble a child has who had the support wheels before and has now to go without (does your father has aspie/autistic features?). After all you cant really develop a sense of equilibrium with support wheels. I remember how insecure and scared I felt. A child with some motor clumsiness (as Aspergers often have), will have objectively more reasons to be scared and needs more time and more help and encouragement. Also something your father might have been not able to see. Then he did not see that and how much it would have helped you with other things, if he had helped you to make this achievement. It is not nice to have a father who is not good at guessing the problems you have, and what he could do about it. But it is also a real challenge to have an aspie kid.

I guess you must have other, and better reasons for the "abusive".

He abused me as a child, and he enjoyed do even little things to make me feel stressed and cause me pain. He really didn't care about me at all.

Why making sudden changes?

Wouldn't it be better if you were allowed to sleep in diapers and be potty training only during the day at first?

Wouldn't it be better if you were allowed to ride a bike with extra wheels slightly up (so you learn to keep balance to ride straight but they will not let you fall down if you lose it).

In my opinion your parents just had a wrong approach.

My caregivers were just giving up on my quirks.

I was allowed to sit on a potty while playing/watching TV till I was 6(although I am not sure if it was a potty training problem or just my keeping the pee inside for unhealthy long periods of time because of being focused too much to take a break and go to restroom).

And I kept the training wheels till age 8. My grandpa tried to remove them before but I refused to ride a bike without side wheels even with his support (well, I was OK with it till he let the bike go for the first time, I couldn't trust him anymore after that) so he attached them again. Much later I learned keeping balance by riding on a rutted parking where side wheels could not always touch the ground. When I was 8, accidentally went on the rut part and lost my balance there. I realized then, that the wheels won't always help me and I need to know how to balance without them. So I decided to ride there over and over till I can do it without falling down. It took me a just a few hours to learn how to ride without side wheels aid. I asked grandpa to remove the wheels the same evening and we never attached them again.