I never said I wanted to be normal

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Does anyone ever get annoyed when mental health professionals parrot that whole line about "you are perfectly normal" or "it's okay to be different" or the classic "If everyone were the same life would be boring". Whoever said I needed that reassurance?

I'm not knocking those who genuinely do struggle with feeling like an outcast and wanting to be normal. If you feel that way your struggle is totally valid and I hope you can find a way to overcome that. It's just not my problem.

My mental health problems are a problem because they inhibit my level of functioning and make life less enjoyable or tolerable. f**k everyone else's opinion. I do worry about discrimination but that's because I want to keep a goddamn job, not because I worry people will think less of me if they knew about my mental issues. Again, f**k everyone else's opinions.

So why are people wasting my time with all this nonsense about how I'm "totally normal"? That's cute - still doesn't fix my mental issues.

I know, I know - it's a common concern among the mentally ill but it just seems like an empty platitude that people say to appease you. It obviously comes from a good place but it's a total distraction from the actual issue. My main concern is being well enough to hold down a job and support myself. This has nothing to do with wanting to be like everyone else - f**k everyone else - I want to be independent. How does one become independent if they are so dependent on the validation of others?

Seriously, is it really that unusual to have a patient that just wants to get on with s**t?

Does anyone ever get annoyed when mental health professionals parrot that whole line about "you are perfectly normal" or "it's okay to be different" or the classic "If everyone were the same life would be boring". Whoever said I needed that reassurance?

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no mental health professional has ever told me that before.

although, i ain't "perfectly normal". that's way too vague. "normal" in what way? in some ways i am "normal". for example, a neuropsychiatrist measured my IQ score. my IQ score was "normal". in some ways, i ain't normal. for example, Gender Identity Disorder, autism, clinical depression. 6 out of 10 personality disorders diagnosed.

but of course everyone has a right to say anything they want. what they say does not have to be factually accurate.

"okay" to be different in what way? it is okay with the speaker, for you (specifically) to be different. b/c, after all, if everyone were the same, then maybe they would have fewer clients and thus less business. supply versus demand.

yes, if everyone were the same it would be boring. but i would rather be boring than get the amount of social rejection that i got when i was young. furthermore, what is boring is subjective. besides, some of us do not enjoy too much excitement. boring could be bad (connotation). boring could also be good. (familiar and obsessive compulsive disorder).
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I'm not knocking those who genuinely do struggle with feeling like an outcast and wanting to be normal.
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yes i feel like an outcast and want to be normal. cisgender and neurotypical. and et cetera. it's just more convenient to be normal.
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So why are people wasting my time with all this nonsense about how I'm "totally normal"? That's cute - still doesn't fix my mental issues.

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maybe those professionals tell you that, b/c their job description tells them they have to recite those lines. for example, when i worked at a political campaign, my job was to read aloud a script. word for word. verbatim. and then the supervisor was sitting next to me. the supervisor had the nerve to tell me, that i was not theatrical enough. like an actor has to recite certain lines. maybe they were just doing their job.

maybe those professionals were telling you what they thought they would've wanted to hear, if they were to have been in your situation.

but of course i ain't psychic. so i can't know for sure. only speculate. guess. theories.


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I don't think I'm "perfectly normal." While there are many things I do well, I am very conscious of the fact that I'm lacking a lot of life experience. I want to strive, as my tennis instructor said, to add wisdom, life knowledge to my book knowledge. I believe that my social skills expanded in leaps and bounds with all the new activities I have been involved in for the past couple of years.

I was very late learning life skills and don't know if I will ever have all of the things "normal" people take for granted and learned in the process of growing up. I am starting to come back from a very bad three months where I was in danger of losing everything I gained over the past two years. I keep in mind the words of one of my favorite tennis players, Denis Istomin, "I'm here now." I hope I do things better (and smarter) this time.

Everyone wants to be 'healthy', but not everyone wants to be 'normal'.

Yet people kept associating the word 'normal' for 'healthy'.
Therefore, when people say you're normal like it's a good thing -- it means that they assumed that you're fine and healthy.


If only they knew: There is such thing as a mentally/emotionally unhealthy NT, and there's also such thing as a mentally/emotionally healthy ND.
It's just the odds and the so-called 'ways of the world' that would dictate that either are or supposedly less likely.

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