Mood stabiliser making me depressed? +anger/irritation issue

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Hi everybody,

I have autism spectrum disorder and historically would say my main issues were depression, anxiety, OCD and anger issues and aggressive impulses I had to fight not to act on (I suspect heavily as a result of the autism). I don't really ever remember being happy.

I was originally put on SSRIs by the psychiatrist at the autism centre (Zoloft) and it felt simply divine. I was happy for the first time in my life, stopped hating everybody around me and became engaged with people and sociable, albeit far too much. After 6 weeks I'd swung heavily into mania and one day became aggressive. My psych told me I could never again go on SSRIs and needed mood stabilisers. I've been on Sodium Valproate for over 2 months now, but I feel the longer time goes on, the more depressed I feel.

I don't enjoy anything anymore, I'm becoming sad, I have no motivation to do anything and I feel like everybody is a constant irritation and every time I try to get close to them I just want to be alone again because I get angry / irritated / stressed.

I really miss how I felt in the early times with Zoloft. Is there any medication that will get me back to feeling happy but without inducing mania?

Thank you for your time and support.

Lamictal stabilizes mood in both poles, mania and depression. You could ask your doctor for that medication instead.

Perhaps you could try an antipsychotic that helps with depression like Abilify