Depression

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So depression has been an ongoing issue for me for a number of years, and I would imagine that's probably true for many folks on the spectrum. It's not constant but instead sort of comes and goes. With me, it's never really gotten to the point of preventing me from getting out of bed and getting through my day like I've heard about with some folks, but I still do think that it impacts my life. I guess my main symptoms would be feelings of sadness, hopelessness, lack of motivation, stress/irritability, withdrawing from other people, and suicidal thoughts/wishes to be dead (sometimes, when it's at its worst).

Now, I don't know about you guys, but I'm not really a big fan of the "chemical imbalance" theory of depression. Instead, I think that most cases of depression are based on life circumstances. I am willing to admit that neurochemicals could play a role, but I am more likely to think that neurochemical issues would be effects of what we are dealing with rather than a random cause with no explanation. And this whole dishing out Prozac prescriptions based on a five-minute interview without doing any kind of medical examination is just utterly ridiculous! Especially when there are numerous medical conditions that can cause the same symptoms as depression.

But even if there are some folks who are otherwise happy and healthy and suddenly suffer random chemical imbalances that lead to depression, in my case, rather than being due to a chemical imbalance, I think my depression is much more likely to be because of these factors (in this order, though it's honestly really hard for me to rank number one and number two, so they may both be number one )

1. The lack of any meaningful direction or purpose in my life.

2. The way that the world is/people are, especially when compared to my idealistic nature. The depression seems to be getting worse as I have gotten older, gained more life experience, and observed how the real world works and how most people are.

3. The effects of modern society (poor diet, lack of exercise, high stress levels, constantly rushing around, lack of connection to nature, etc.)

So I guess my question is, for someone who doesn't really buy the standard model of depression and its causes/treatments, what are my options for overcoming it as best as possible? Medication is off the table for me for multiple reasons, but mostly because I don't believe that it's what I need. I already take one medicine for anxiety, wish that I didn't, and I'm not adding anything else to the mix.

How does one go about finding a purpose/direction in life? When you're someone like me who wishes deep down that the world was something different than it is, how do you learn to cope with the real world?

If there are other folks here who have struggled with depression, how other than medication have you overcome it or at least tried/are trying to?

In my humble opinion, there are two methods for resolving depression. These are the psychological approach and the physiological approach.

Generally in the psychological approach you meet with a counselor or psychologist who will try and talk you through your trauma and then prescribe drugs to treat it.

The physiological approach looks at the way the brain operates, how it releases and stores trauma released by a cascade of different hormones and then vents this stored chemical stress. This release can be accomplished by very specific types of exercises.

If you are interested in learning more about this second approach, I would suggest two books:

In an Unspoken Voice by Peter A. Levine
The Revolutionary Trauma Release Process by David Berceli

I will take a look at those books. Thanks so much!

That's a tough one. I also feel depression is generally situational (like you mentioned). That's how it has mostly been for me, and I've suffered very severe suicidal and persistent depression in the past, as well as more mild/fleeting depression.

I basically tried to set goals for myself and work towards them. Here are some examples from my life.

I was suicidally depressed after a 5 year relationship ended against my wishes, and it took me 4.5 years to find someone new, but I eventually did find that person (and we are now married). I also wasn't happy in my workplace (and eventual unemployment), so ended up looking into new jobs and eventually settling on something that was more fulfilling for me.

As a kid and adolescent, I was depressed because I had let myself become overweight/obese. I was very self-conscious and acutely sensitive to how others treated me and judged me based on my weight, and usually felt uncomfortable around others. I wanted to be more confident socially and eventually get a girlfriend. So I finally disciplined myself to lose the weight after several years of trying, and lost about 55lbs in under a year, and in turn I eventually was able to have those intimate relationships I was after, as well as the social confidence. It didn't happen as easily or as quickly as I had hoped, but eventually things changed for me for the better.

During the time after that 5 year GF had dumped me, when I was still single and for a while unemployed, I turned mainly to alcohol for comfort. I once again gained a lot of weight (I had been thin for many years but finally that streak ended), and I became fairly isolated and depressed in a very detached way (and my lifestyle became very dangerous for myself as result). So I decided to quit drinking and to get myself in shape and get my life back on track, one day at a time.

I lost about 95 lbs in a little over a year, and opened a lot of new doors for myself. I set employment goals by finding a job that sounded interesting for me and gradually following through on that. I went on to meet my current wife within some months of re-entering the online dating world with renewed confidence (fwiw, I found the online dating world to be extremely discouraging overall, but it can work, and for me it seemed there were few other viable alternatives).

Sometimes it's about making some goals and problem-solving and then making decisions. Things don't always turn out how you planned, and the goals my not be fulfilled exactly as you hope, but usually if you do this to some significant degree, you'll be on your way to a better life situation. I think if the goals are simple and concrete and you know they're what you want, you have a good shot at combating depression by using this method.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experiences, eyelessshiver! I am glad to hear that despite some difficult past experiences, things seem to be going well for you now.

I think you're right about needing to make decisions, set goals, and work toward them. The problem in my case is that there are so many different things that I want that shift from time to time. And some of the things conflict with one another. There are so many different directions I can see my life going. It has always been really hard for me to figure out what I want out of life, and I'm not sure I'm ever going to get there.

As far as reason number two for my depression that I mentioned above, I had sort of an epiphany today regarding that (I always love when those happen because they can be very insightful and helpful for me). I basically realized that what I have to work on is staying who I am at heart (or rather, rediscovering that person since I have really become a much more bitter and cynical person over the years because of reason number two) despite the way that the world and most people are. Basically, I have to work on not letting the world and humanity get me down and maintaining my inner joy and peace regardless. The big question of course is exactly how to do that... but I'm still waiting for that epiphany!