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colliegrace
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06 Jun 2023, 8:51 pm

Anyone else?

I kinda flip-flop on whether I have Avoidant PD or not, but I think I do. It's most obvious when in depressive episodes. I also have some traits that are similar to BPD (borderline personality disorder), but AVPD is similar to BPD due to just chronic fears of rejection and abandonment so I think AVPD is more likely.


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Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD


Fnord
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06 Jun 2023, 11:13 pm

PTSD is my bugaboo.  All it takes are certain sounds or smells, and I immediately react again to certain childhood events.  Recognizing those reactions for what they are helps me keep my cool.


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IsabellaLinton
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07 Jun 2023, 1:31 am

I have Complex-PTSD and Acute-PTSD from emotional, physical, psychological, and sexual assault.

Trauma isn't a personality disorder but it's still very hard to cope.


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Winters Gate
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07 Jun 2023, 3:02 am

Unfortunately yes. I've spent a lot of time working through my issues from verbal and physical abuse as a child. I'm in a better place.now though I still.occasionally get triggered in relation to that.



babybird
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07 Jun 2023, 10:39 am

I have traits of npd and aspd both as a result of upbringing...learnt behaviour or what ever.

I actually think I do pretty well in fighting them both, especially the npd. It takes a lot of effort but it's worth it to me and obviously to those around me.

The aspd is more of a challenge because I'm really impulsive and I find it really difficult to resist the adrenaline side of things. But I reckon I do OK. I think having good influences and good support around me has helped.


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colliegrace
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07 Jun 2023, 12:56 pm

For me it was emotional, mental, and verbal abuse. Mostly as a teenager, late teens specifically. We were a dysfunctional family at that point and I was the scapegoat. My sister was the golden child, idolized and protected from my "influence" as much as possible. Anything she did wrong was blamed on me. Everything that went wrong period was blamed on me.


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ASD level 1, ADHD-C, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)

Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD


TwilightPrincess
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07 Jun 2023, 1:00 pm

I don't have a personality disorder, but I have PTSD from various traumatic events. I'm sure that childhood abuse, especially, has affected my personality in various ways. I'm very shy and reserved and have trouble getting close to people.



Fairfield
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07 Jun 2023, 6:15 pm

I might maybe, possibly have BPD and/or AVPD, all from lifelong trauma. They can overlap so much in certain aspects, so I don't really know which one I have "more" symptoms of. If anything a lot of the issues I have intertwine and those problems feed off of each other.

I was neglected and abused emotionally, mentally, and sometimes sexually up until last year. I find it very hard to cope with the problems I have due to it, and have a severe fear of abandonment and, ironically, of being around others because of it.



UncannyDanny
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09 Jun 2023, 7:34 am

I think I've developed one as a child. My dad was an intolerant, abusive scumbag who tends to punish me over the most minor reasons, telling me to "Grow Up" whenever I wanted a hug from going through a very hard time, and doesn't seem to care what happens to me when I go around the neighborhood without adult supervision. He tends to threaten me "Kill Me. Dead. Graveyard Dead." (Yes, he actually said those words), gets annoyed when my mom vacuums or when I blurt out a swear word (Heck, he doesn't even allow me to say something as mild as "crap", yet he himself has no qualms blurting out S-words. Hypocrite. -_- ). Because of this, I've unknowingly developed his personality, even though I'm trying to be more respectful and nice as much as possible.



colliegrace
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11 Jun 2023, 8:12 pm

I just need to get this out. Beware that it goes into detail on emotional abuse and may be extremely triggering to some.


Imagine being blamed for stuff that wasn't your fault. Being the scapegoat. Sibling misbehaved? Must be Collie's's bad influence. Marriage failing? Collie is taking my husband from me. Imagine being screamed at for literal hours about what a terrible daughter you are, how ugly your personality is, how you have everyone fooled into thinking you're sweet but I know the truth and the truth is you are ugly. Imagine mother and younger sibling ganging up on you saying the same things. Sis did this, sis did that, sis is a bad person. Your only escape, because they will follow you no matter which room you go to, is to pretend to fall asleep. And even then it doesn't stop. They physically push you around to see if you're really awake or not. You manage to keep up the facade of deep sleep. They eventually leave you alone, but by the time they do so you've fallen asleep for real.


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ASD level 1, ADHD-C, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)

Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD


UncannyDanny
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11 Jun 2023, 8:32 pm

^Wow, your life is just as bad as my childhood, Collie. :(

Need a hug?



colliegrace
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11 Jun 2023, 8:38 pm

UncannyDanny wrote:
^Wow, your life is just as bad as my childhood, Collie. :(

Need a hug?

I probably should clarify that this was my teenage years. But they are still affecting me today.

A hug is nice, thanks


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ASD level 1, ADHD-C, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)

Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD


Fairfield
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11 Jun 2023, 9:13 pm

^^^

I went through something similar where I was regularly prevented from sleeping and woken up while asleep by being yelled at. I still have problems sleeping due to it since I can't relax at all. I'm sorry that your family did similar crap to you. :(



TwilightPrincess
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11 Jun 2023, 10:41 pm

Fairfield wrote:
^^^

I went through something similar where I was regularly prevented from sleeping and woken up while asleep by being yelled at. I still have problems sleeping due to it since I can't relax at all. I'm sorry that your family did similar crap to you. :(

I've experienced that, too, but in a relationship. Sleep deprivation can be used as a means of control.



renaeden
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14 Jun 2023, 5:03 pm

^My dad did that to my mum, knowing she would be tired for work.

In my teenage years I was left alone a lot, some may have seen it as neglect. I had adult responsibilities very early because of this. So as an adult I was tested for personality disorders and #1 was schizoid personality disorder.



colliegrace
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21 Jun 2023, 7:06 pm

Straight up told my mom today, stop treating me like s**t or I will leave and not come back.


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ASD level 1, ADHD-C, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)

Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD