My history of severe Pedophilia OCD

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I sometimes have severe OCD, Pedophilic type with derealization and lack of insight/delusional beliefs and nightmares.

It's OCD, it's not the same as Pedophilic Disorder, please don't stigmatize me

I've struggled with that type of OCD & other types in my teens & early 20s. I had a high sex drive & my OCD connected it to who was around me when that had nothing to do with it. I had random thoughts about doing things that disturbed me & my OCD told me that if I had the thoughts that meant I secretly wanted to when I hated the idea of possibly acting on it. I also had an obsession with fake pix for a couple years due to hoarding & organizing aspect & I did not enjoy it.

I was worried that if I talked to anyone about this offline I would get locked up for being a threat. However I tried talking to my psychiatrist about this once when I was 20 but I didn't realize what was really going on or know how to explain it. She asked me a couple questions about the type of stuff I watched & if if I was planning on doing anything. The diagnoses of pedophilia was added to my psych report but that was it, maybe I was lucky.

I guess I got over it by focusing on other things with life like staying busier, getting older & more knowledgeable about myself, taking a med for my OCD, & taking a med that lowered my sex drive. My sex drive was just an OCD trigger & not the root problem but I felt more relaxed not having to deal with it.
I wish you the best of luck with this. I know the worry can take a major toll on you mentally.

You mean intrusive thoughts of doings things you would never actually do and you're made anxious from having them in the first place? I get thoughts like that sometimes.