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The ring of invalidation

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beneficii
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Age: 40
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27 Oct 2013, 7:36 pm

GGPViper wrote:
beneficii wrote:
Psychologist: You're just going to have to accept you're not getting the surgery anytime soon. I agree that insurance should cover it, but it doesn't. You just have to accept it.

Me: My stomach still burns.

P: Think of it like this. I want a luxury car, but I can't get it. Life moves on. I go onto other better things.

M: You think needing that surgery is like wanting a luxury car?

P: In a way, yes.

M: So, in reality, you don't really think it should be covered with insurance.

P: What? No. I think insurance should cover it.

M: No you don't. If needing this surgery were like wanting a luxury car, then why should insurance cover it?

P: Beneficii. You're being selfish. Think about all the starving children in the world. Think about something other than just yourself, for once.

Psychologist: You're just going to have to accept you're not getting the surgery anytime soon. I agree that insurance should cover it, but it doesn't. You just have to accept it.

You: I agree. I will start actually listening to your advice and stop trying to screw over people who are trying to help me.


Oh I do agree. Unfortunately, my stomach doesn't. There's something raw, animal about it.



beneficii
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28 Oct 2013, 12:25 am

I think I've got it. I need to change my therapist. I see him tomorrow. If he continues with the invalidation of my gender dysphoria, then I will tell him point blank "I am taking my business elsewhere." When I was in the hospital last, the adviser there had recommended a therapist with experience working with transgender people, whom he thought was good. My current therapist doesn't seem to have much knowledge of either ASD or gender dysphoria--he at one point even said that the restricted interests in autism were the same as the obsessions in OCD!

Another problem with my therapist, and the crux of it all, is that he encourages a passive role with regard to my gender dysphoria. I feel now that I need to take a more active role in getting my needs met. I need to work to get myself into a situation where my surgery will be covered. Otherwise, this gender dysphoria will end up destroying my mind. Unfortunately, I do not know the way. I understand that my autism and executive dysfunction conspire to make things more difficult for me, so it seems I am going down a path that is not trodden.