Trans people: Never rely on another trans person for support

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Yeah, if only there was a friendlier place online for support huh? I've yet to have found that anywhere. Just people telling you how you should live your life and that you should be happy like this person, etc. It's to the point that I don't think anyone really has empathy in this world and it's all just really shells of nastiness with only tiny points of light here and there, kinda like the night sky with stars in it... only with fewer stars. It sucks that you have to look everywhere for only a few people who have true compassion. For me, there is this one girl on deviantart whom constantly expresses her wish for me not to commit suicide, and she's in a worse condition then me, she's quadraplegic so you would think she has her own yep john problems to deal with. Despite all my negative thoughts, she continues to support me when she can, choosing to constantly respond to my PMs despite this. She drew me pictures of me in my desired forms with her etc. too. None of this she didn't have to do especially in her condition where she can barely draw without difficulty, and yet she's been doing this with me for like almost three years and still she calls me the pure one. And what touched me even more, she wanted me to let her know if I was going to commit suicide rather then me just leaving without her knowing, leaving her up to more sadness she would rather bear. If you ever watched .hack//sign, I often compare me and her to Tsukasa and Tsubaru, the similarities are uncanny.

Anyways, sorry I got a bit off topic there, she matters quite a bit to me. What I was trying to say, is thankfully there are extreme polar opposites in this world online as well... it's part of what keeps me alive.

They can't give it to you. At best, they will give you rash, belittling advice that they expect you to follow to the letter, even if it leads you down a dead end.

I told them that I had received an initial denial for SRS and then all hell broke loose. Immediately, I was bombarded with posts saying, "Well, you didn't get a proper diagnosis," "Well, you didn't bother to get the two letters," "Had you done all of this then for sure you would have won initial approval." I defended myself, saying that I did do all the legwork and that I had expected that I would probably receive an initial denial anyway, but they would not hear it. The admin then stepped in, saying, "You have to remember that other people exist, too, and that they have their own opinions. You don't have to get so defensive." They then started to imply that I was lying when I said that my endo was billing my insurance for 302.85 Gender Identity Disorder and the claims were getting approved, saying, "You know, if you had bothered to read the plan documents," which I had, with the farking lawyer at the TLDEF I was working with.

I then asked them to stop giving me all this poisonous "advice," and to just show support, but another poster came in saying, "What? So you expect us to give you unquestioned support? Do you think I'm supposed to just trust what you said happened with the insurance company?" After that, I was suspended. I saw I had 2 new PMs, but because I was suspended I could not read them. I emailed the forum director to send the 2 PMs, but she refused and told me that I "obviously feel that any suggestions other than [my] own thoughts are invalid and not to be considered." She continued, "Well, so be it. It's obvious that you do need help and I would urge you seek out some serious psychiatric help," so I goaded her into permabanning me, because I was tired of her s**t.

The forum in question by the way is at lauras-playground.com. The thread in question is in the Transsexual/Transgender Surgeries thread, if you want to check it out (assuming it's still there). (My username there was Erika_1984.) Apparently, that website is a total farking cesspool with arrogant people who give "advice" when they barely even know your situation and seem to often disbelieve your reports of it and then demand that you give their uninformed advice equal weight to those of the people who actually know your situation. You are not permitted to ask for only support, but not unsolicited advice, apparently.

Those people can go burn in f*****g hell.

BTW, I'm also getting ready to go to the lauras-playground.com chat (which I can still access) and fry the chat moderator who suggested that I join the forum in the first place, as soon as I see he is online. By doing so, he put me through a totally unnecessary gauntlet of stress and arrogance, which marks all my interactions with the poisonous trans community.

At it again? trying to paint all trans people as terrible, mean spirited individuals...I see. I still have to wonder why, the way it sounds there might be one decent trans person in the world and they should immediately develop disdain, distrust, dislike and an urge to avoid of fellow trans individuals since none of them are supportive and all of them only give rash, belittling advice. Or am i over-estimating and there's actually zero trans people who are decent individuals?