Asexuality

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I'm a hetero-romantic asexual. I only discovered that last year, thanks to Tumblr and its post on different sexualities. I never really was sexually attracted to anyone, I only wanted to do things with boys I liked that best friends did, and maybe even kiss as well. I did get curious about sex, however, and it has felt good for me, but I was often bored by it too (It didn't help that I had complications with my boyfriend), and from what I've read online, I'm still asexual, because when like a boy, I don't want to do that with them. I never understood why it was such a big thing anyway.

Grey-A. Gray Sexual. Grace.

That's me.

^I love your avatar! Nice!

I've always been uncomfortable when people kiss on tv or in movies. Blek.

Thanks! He's my baby.

Me too, but purely because of the noise. Drives me misophonically crazy. I doubt it'd be acceptable to make out with earplugs in, because that might actually work for me.
To make matters even more complicated, another thread made me think about this asexuality thing and I think I could be ok with a relationship with a man, just not sex with one. I just never go there because you show interest in your average guy past friends and that's exactly where his mind goes, and I don't want to give guys the wrong idea. I know I can have sex with a woman, just haven't been into it at all with girlfriends I've had and ended up having sex just to keep them happy, but I know I couldn't have sex with a man. Relationships and kissing/touching though - maybe. Gah, when did this all get so complicated again.

aspie, asexual heteroromantic. to answer some questions posed to others about being ace/romantic, for me its a matter of having zero desire for sex, and enormous difficulty in obtaining any kind of physical arousal, which vanishes as soon as i get an itch or after 10 seconds have elapsed, or something. i have issues with things in my face so kissing is incredibly invasive and not romantic for me, though i do love cuddling and being romantic with someone if im comfortable with them. pretty sure my odds of finding someone to be with who is fine with never having sex are about slim to none, so thats really depressing and makes me not want to try dating. "everyone involved is just going to be disappointed" is my line of thinking

that... that is not what asexuality is. thats misandry.

I could live without kissing or having sex again. But could you live with all my quirks and flaws, Felahr? Yeah. Haha. No. :$

everyone has quirks and flaws. and standards of their own. of course theres more to it than "be okay with no sex" its just that most normal humans are so sex-centric because its a social and evolutionarily hardwired behavior, that its a pretty big dealbreaker for these normal people. its not something either party can ever compromise on, if that makes sense.

I can't feel any stimulation at all sex wise, when I do it is short and sometimes painful. I don't like the idea of it either. It grosses me out. I like touching alot when it's nonsexual but..sex is a mystery to me. Idk why people are so obsessed with it.

Mostly it upsets me because it's already hard to connect with people. Then I have to tell them that I'm numb downstairs. Usually it doesn't last long.

Yes. I am a heteroromantic asexual.

All of the above.

It doesn't interest me, it's not pleasurable (at least masturbation isn't, and my instincts tell me sex won't be either), and I don't understand how others can find it so desirable.



Yes, I have.

I don't have alexithymia, and I don't think I have ToM issues either. (At least, I'm pretty sure I met the normal milestones for understanding false beliefs as a child.) However, when I was younger I often tricked myself into thinking I felt something because I thought I was 'supposed' to feel it. This led to me making up sexual attractions where there were none.

However, I talked to a NT lesbian who used to do the same thing (as well as mistaking actual attraction for simply wanting to make friends with that girl) so I'm not sure it has anything to do with my autism. Sex is hard for most teens to figure out, and it's even harder when what the adults say should be happening doesn't match your experience.

The thing is, I don't really consider myself asexual, but since I've only had sex just once in my life (back in 1999) I may as well be asexual.

I don't consider myself to be asexual but I can live my life and not have sex. I may only be interested in it once but once I have it with you, we are done. My interest in having it is gone unless we want to have kids. However I let my husband have sex with me because it makes him happy. It took me a while to do it because I was always bored during it and anxious for it to end. I am just not sexually active and it's a chore if I have to do anything so if I can just lay there and talk about anything, I am fine with it. I am repulsed by lot of the sex moves people do so I prefer to not see it or hear about it. But yet I have found it funny on South Park because it's a comedy show. I consider myself a gray a.

How often you have sex has nothing to do with being asexual. Asexuality is about rarely or never wanting sex, whether or not you have the opportunity to have sex regularly.

*raises hand*
Asexual here. I'm just not interested at all.

What about people who have a foot fetish? All I read is that people think that because you like a particular part of a person's anatomy in a sexual way then you are not Asexual...that's what NTs tell me...I mean, are they right or wrong? What do you guys think?

Either way, I have never liked or enjoyed sex...exes have asked me about it, made me sit and watch porn with them...made me have sex through force...it felt so bad and I hate it so much...I've visited that Asexuality forum...but there are so many labels for different kinds of asexuality I got confused and I got a little bit upset ;|