anyone else view sexual orientation like this? (edited)

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edit: I have cut this post just to get to the main point.

When I was younger I always perceived attraction to men as a masculine trait and attraction to women as a feminine trait. Thus I never understood why gay men were harassed they were the most masculine men in my view at the time. Anyone else think like this at some point?

Last edited by Iloveshoujoai on 22 Mar 2012, 1:51 am, edited 4 times in total.

I'm a woman who is (in terms of physical appearance) attracted to androgyny in men. (It's possible that I could be attracted to women, though I haven't met very many who I find good-looking in an androgynous way.) I'm generally more feminine myself though. I wear dresses/skirts a lot and I have long hair. Rather than being attracted to an opposite I think I'm drawn to what I see as a nice balance of feminine and masculine qualities.

However, despite the fact that I dress more femininely I do think that my gender self-identification is more of a composite. Afterall, I do value having a partner who can express various gender roles, allowing for more of a back-and-forth dynamic in the relationship rather than each of us occupying a fixed role.

In terms of pink, I've heard most people associate it with sweetness (the taste). I wonder how that would relate to sexual orientation.

in terms of pink [ladies, the drink, that is], suck down enough of them and anything is possible, much to the chagrin of many a hangover-addled and mortified person with a stranger in their bed.
anyways, i've long found only androgynous types to be attractive- feminine men and masculine [tomboyish] woman.

Redacted

Last edited by nat4200 on 21 Apr 2012, 1:40 am, edited 1 time in total.

I agree with the last part actually, although I'm not necessarily talking about true androgyny nor do I care whether the color pink is a girl's color. The point I am making is that I thought it was strange that liking girls was considered masculine and liking boys was considered feminine.

It isn't. It wasn't all that long ago that baby boys were put in pink and girls in blue.

I don't have an opinion on the color pink sense I'm colorblind but I am a guy who like more fem things than the average straight guy. I relate to women better than men & I think that it should be good sense I'm attracted to women(I become attracted to most any woman as I get to know her & she's nice towards me) but unfortunately liking some fem things & being kind of fem isn't an attractive quality to most women & lots of guys are quick to judge me as queer

I don't think liking any colour dictates your sexual orientation.

I like purple and that don't make me less masculine. 

I didn't mean to make this a discussion about the color pink or what kind of girls/guys we like (I'm fine with it if that's what you want to debate though ) I have rephrased my post a bit so I hope it is clearer.

perhaps that's true. I am confused myself about what I am trying to describe.

Well, firstly I think none of this theorizing has anything to do with sexual orientation or explaining it.

But, I think my circumstance breaks the pattern, anyways. My gender presentation and what I'm interested in is really fluid . . . my interests are all up for assessment by others so far as their masculinity or femininity, because that has nothing to do with why I'm into them. I tend to be more masculine or feminine depending on my mood . . . so I guess that would be like, a masculinity that's not afraid to break the boundaries of what is masculine, but often doesn't.

In guys, I'm more immediately drawn to masculine guys. I get attracted to really masculine women occasionally too. But awesomeness generally over-rides gender presentation in the equation.

There's a scale for how masculine, feminine, or androgynous a person is, according to binaries that are most definitely not universal either, but then there's also a scale for how relevant gender is to a person, and whether it's a suitable lens to scrutinize them through. With me it is, but I play around with it. But the scale can range from completely irrelevant to very exaggerated and important.

Personally, I've always liked people who were not as adapted to the "norm" as others. I never liked very "masculine" men. I also always liked girls whose interests were not as "female" as others. You know... many girls do not like music. Instead, they were into horses and... rabbits. And cute things that never seemed cute to me.

Actually, it makes a lot of sense. But not many people talk about it.

It always seemed strange to me that heterosexual men would fancy women, but at the same time hate everything that women do. It's just very contradictory.


I've always liked dark blue. Just like I've always liked autumn.

I don't think colours say anything either.

I think the OP was just using an example when he or she discussed liking the color pink.

From what I gather, he or she is describing a possible phenomenon whereby males or females inherit psychological traits that are "supposed" to be found only in the sex that is not their own. Definitely an interesting question, if I understand it right.

In other words, if this phenomenon is real, then we would find that during the development of (for example) a male human being, his brain was wired in ways that, under "normal" circumstances, only a female's brain would be wired, and that one of these "unusual" wirings could be cause the male to behave (to various extents depending on the exact wiring) in "homosexual" ways.

For the reason that brains in general are diverse, I am inclined to believe that this phenomenon exists to some degree. Good thread!

what I was trying to get across is actually much simpler than that. I just perceived liking boys as a masculine trait and liking girls as a feminine trait, that's all. Thank you though for the insight .

its all relative to environment how others view and your view of self. Too some extent my views have evolved with time but bottom line is if no barriers block your mind then whatever works for you is good. I like hot electric pink but not bubble gum soft pastel pink. However several hundred years ago many things were reverse instead of today including color associations. Example hot male color was pink and hot lady color was blue. Once all labels are removed interest focuses reflect real interests rather then sex guided male or female. Things needing strength need bodies to match. some things require dexterity of stamina and sex is not a factor in work. Its philosophies and religions that direct group viewpoints.