Married to an Aspie

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We've been together for 14 years and sometimes it's a struggle. I'm fairly outgoing and he calls himself an "introvert." Well, let me tell you, he's an introvert on steroids. I've finally had to disconnect a little so I can get out in the world. I don't mind traveling or meeting people on my own.
Trouble is he sees nothing wrong with avoiding people. Finds ALL my friends either weird, pretentious or rude. He can't read any sort of non-verbal signals. Thinks nobody likes him, etc. etc. Over the years he has (and I've allowed him to) drive most of my friends and family away.
He's generally a sweet and caring guy. We get along well when we're on our own, but bring another person into the mix and things explode.
So I've told him I'll continue to be his roommate and friend, but no longer consider him my spouse. I'm going traveling on my own and creating my own social life.
I feel a lot of compassion for him. I don't think Aspergers is a disease anymore than homosexuality is a disease. He is who he is, he's just wired differently than me.
Are there any other's out there who are married to an Aspie and has similar experience?
Thanks
Todani

I'm sorry to hear about the struggle that you have both had. It sounds like you are doing the right thing for yourself by recognising that your needs can not be met while the label 'marriage' is still attached to the relationship.

It sounds like you have committed to remaining his friend, which I think is so important in his situation (even though he does not want and may not need more than one close relationship) he may have a very hard time with the changing parameters of that relationship...so I think it is admirable that you are remaining his friend and roommate.

Best wishes moving forward.

Hi Todani! What you describe sounds a lot like my own marriage of 13 years (though I was the Aspie introvert, and my husband was the social one).

We tried the 'roommate' thing for a year, but in the end decided to separate, and now we're finally divorcing - and in our case, it's for the best. We still care for each other (and have decided to be 'cousins' ) but our lifestyle preferences are completely opposite, and now we're both relieved to be able to just do our own thing.

Good luck to you guys, and I hope you enjoy your traveling and adventures!

Thanks to both of you for the feedback. My Aspie told me the other day he felt relief in our new status. Perhaps it's because I'm not telegraphing my disapproval anymore. He's pretty intuitive that way. The "friend" thing might work for us. One can hope....