LGBT People? I Need Friends.

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It's taking a lot of courage to post this because I'm really putting myself out there.

I'm 30 years old, a lesbian (although I occasionally have crushes on girly gay guys and male characters on TV shows), and COMPLETELY inexperienced and COMPLETELY isolated from the GLBT community. I have an informal diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome as well as severe social anxiety and agoraphobia which has kept me from ever having any sort of romantic relationship with anyone. I have never even kissed anyone, let alone anything else. I have no real life friends and no gay friends, save for one online acquaintance who is a lesbian and one former online friend who is bisexual. I live in a town in Ohio where there is one gay bar (that I know of) but I would be too afraid to go to it.

Well, my reason for writing this is that I would like to get to know more gay people. I would like to make some gay friends. Male or female (or otherwise) does not matter to me. My therapist suggested that I try to make gay friends when I saw her last week and I know she's right. This is my attempt. I hope I can make some friends from this site. It would be really great if some people live nearby and we could eventually meet. That's just a dream, but I'd be really happy to make even online friends who are far away. Even if the friendships exist only in cyber land, that's fine with me. It's still a step in the right direction and will make me feel less isolated.

So. That was it. I hope I get some replies or some messages from people.
Thanks for reading

I'm a 38 year old lesbian. I have been with my partner for almost 20 years. I have never had many gay friends and while my town is a decent size we've only ever had 1 gay bar at a time. Bars suck anyway.

I also have social anxiety but it's pretty well treated right now. I have been away from this site for a long time, but if you send me a message I think I'll get an email. Of course sometimes I don't check my email regularly. Long story short, I'd be glad to talk to you but if it takes me a while to reply please know it is nothing personal.

I applaud your courage. My therapist tells me I need to make more friends too.

Thanks for your reply I sent you a message

I have the exact same problem. This reads almost exactly like my life. I'm 38 years old, gay, and diagnosed with Asperger's. I only found out about Asperger's a few years ago, and now realize it has completely screwed me over in my social life. I have nearly no friends, and no romantic or sexual experience at all. Many of us in our 30's who are also LGBT really got locked out of many aspects of society. The Asperger's prevented us from being able to understand our sexuality, and our sexuality, combined with the fact that Asperger's wasn't even diagnosed during our childhood, prevented us from understanding our Asperger's. This froze us out of a huge area of social experience we needed to get at a younger age. Double whammy.

Wow, I can relate. I was just informally diagnosed about two weeks ago and am still waiting on being tested/getting a formal diagnosis. No one ever thought about AS when I was a kid, so I was never tested for it though I should have been. I wouldn't be in this situation now if I had been diagnosed as a child.

If you'd like to get to know each other more and maybe become friends, feel free to message me

Specifically gay people?I'm pansexual and intersex and genderqueer. But more friends are always nice. I don't have enough either.

That's fine! LGBT people are the people I'm trying to make friends with, not just gay men or gay women. If you'd like to try to be friends, I'd like that, too

You may message me anytime you like.

I can relate, except I'm only 17.
I've been diagnosed with aspergers when I was 15 and also found out that I was gay soon after.
I don't really have anyone to talk to about homosexuality in general, as it is something that's frowned upon in my area.
Oh well, I hope you meet someone to talk too through this thread.

I am a 21 cisgender pansexual female. at least I feel that best describes me right now. things are fluid

I'm a 22 year old bisexual male aspie. I've never had any sort of relationship or intimacy either, not even close. I don't have any friends, except for 1 person that I have been exchanging pm's with on another site. I've been pretty much completely isolated for several years. I have pretty severe social anxiety also, I'm terrified of going anywhere where people will see me, never mind having to speak to them. I struggle even to make posts on forums anonymously like this. I have recently started to make some progress towards getting over this though, I've finally managed to talk to a doctor about it, and have been seeing some mental health professionals.

Anyway, I'm not very good at maintaining conversations, sometimes I don't know what to say, but if you'd like to talk I'd love to hear from you.

I've always known I've liked women, but I didn't want to admit how much compared to how much I liked men. Due to this repression, I thought I was bi and mainly into men for years. I am much more into women, though. I live with a male partner, but we hardly ever have sex. It's not what you'd call a normal relationship because I think he's on the asexuality spectrum. I would like a female partner, but I find socialising too stressful and to be honest, I'm not very confident. Also, I don't know if it would complicate things too much with the man I live with. I had some one night stands with women when I was younger, but I had to rely on alcohol to get over my nerves and the internalised homophobia I had at the time.

In terms of who I find attractive, it's about 8/10 times women.

I'm also bad at maintaining conversations, but if you want to talk, I'm here.

You can always PM me! I'm 25. In Texas, though. Hi!

Wow, your situation is similar to mine in some ways.

I'm 30, male, kinda girly/androgynous, with a definite preference for males, and I really havent had much contact with others who are gay or bi or whatever. Not in this area. I'm in Illinois, well south of Chicago, in an area that I like to describe as being right on the boundary of civilization, and endless, endless grass. And farms. We have many, many farms here. So yeah, it's a very dull area, and not the sort of place where I'd really meet anyone like that. Kinda frustrating. And even the "civilization" part mostly consists of a single busy road that has a mall nearby. Other than that, aint much else out here.

What very little "experience" Ive had has been with guys only, and even then, I've never kissed anyone, as frankly the idea of doing THAT particular bit has always bugged me. I've never been big on physical contact.

I'm pretty chatty, and always up for meeting new people, and heck, it'd be nice to meet someone else that has or even KNOWS about autism in general.

Do feel free to message me directly if you'd care to chat a bit!

I am a male who wants to be a lesbian so I know how it feels to be the oddball.

I'm bisexial and genderqueer (i think), it's kinda confused right now ^^

I kinda suck att socializing right now though, even online. Drop me a line if you ever visit Sweden (southern partm that is) though!

/Magnus