"Feeling like a boy/girl"

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I was reading a thread earlier today about whether other aspie members of the forum felt androgynous, and I realised I can't answer this question for myself because I don't really understand what it means to feel like a boy or a girl. I'm a boy. I know this because I have a male body and I was brought up and socialised as one. I have no frame of reference to know what feeling like a girl feels like because I have never been socialised as a girl or biologically female. In short, I've always accepted I'm male not because of some internal sense of gender, but because I've always been told I am one. I do feel that when I tell people I'm a straight male I'm not being 100% honest, but I don't know why that is. Can anyone else relate to this?

Maybe you're gay or bi?

I am a biologically female, but I can totally relate to this.
I never really understood how it is to feel like a girl. I mean, I know that I am female, but don´t feel like that. I feel rather neutral inside. That´s not a problem for me, but others sometimes are confused because I don´t act how they expect a female is like. I was also often mistaken as a boy when I was a child (and it sometimes happen until now because I have short hair and sometimes wear not really girly clothes). People who know that have already asked if that isn´t bothering for me, but in fact I don´t care because although they are obviously wrong when they call me male I don´t care. I don´t identify with my gender. My personality itself is important for me and not the fact that I have a female body.
By the way: Is here anybody who could explain how it feels like to feel like a girl/boy? I would be interested in that because I don´t have that feeling and would like to understand it a bit more.

I absolutely agree with crinkly and nightingale!

I do not know what it means to feel make or female. I don't know how other women 'feel', or whether this has anything to do with what skin they are in.

I only know what it feels like to be me.

I find it illogical to allow my physical body to define my personality, my preferences, my personality, the things I enjoy doing, the clothes I wear.

I do not connect any of these things with my reproductive organs. I feel very 'me'. In terms of femininity/masculinity (which I see as VERY different to using the terms male/female) I suppose I'm androgynous feeling neither male nor female.

And beneficil: someone's gender or how they feel in their own body has nothing to do with who they are attracted to (gay or bi). Men, women or anything in between can be attracted to men or women.

I do happen to be a gay woman. I dress in an androgynous way because I don't feel my gender defines me, and my personality is fairly androgynous, too.

You're not alone, OP. For me it is illogical to be defined by your body alone. Perhaps aspies are more logical, but I think the way you feel is more common in aspies than in neurotypicals. Perhaps they are more illogical, or unable to think outside of their boxes. I don't know

That was my fault for saying that when I mention to people that I'm a straight male I feel like I'm not being 100% honest. Sorry for the confusion.

Back on topic:



Mmm. I don't think I've ever experienced this exactly, but I have a colleague at work who regards me as a sister, not a brother, and I've been told by friends that I give off a feminine vibe.

Your posts are giving me lots to think about. Thanks!

Don't forget that it's fine for men to be feminine, crinkly... And visa versa