I just had a big conversation about this in a different Aspie group. Basically, I have no problem with polyamory, but it is not for me. I'm gay, male, and in a long-term monogamous relationship with my partner. If people want to be in multiple romantic relationships and they are able to handle that, than that's great for them. But I put a lot of effort into my relationship. I don't have enough energy or attention to give to more than one person.
I probably could have an open relationship with my partner, but that is not polyamory, is it? Polyamory is being romantic or emotionally intimate with more than one person; an open relationship is being emotionally intimate with only one person but engaging in sexual activity other people without emotional involvement. I could be ok with that, and I think I could tolerate my partner being sexual with other people as long as there wasn't emotional attachment between them. But polyamory is not for me. My partner is my safe haven; frankly, I would be too jealous to let anyone else into that space.
Leon Feingold just gave a great TedTalk about polyamory, and he is a fellow Aspie. if you are poly, you probably won't learn anything new from his talk, but it was interesting nonetheless.
You can find his presentation here: http://new.livestream.com/tedx/bushwick/videos/81090255
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