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xxrobertoxx
Raven
Raven

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Joined: 6 Feb 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 121
Location: Ohio

06 Nov 2015, 9:31 pm

Anyone have trouble meeting new people to go on dates? It doesn't really have to be LGBT but I think that makes things more complicated for an aspie. I always have a hard time figuring out what to say in the first message to another person to try to get things started. I'm very confident in myself though and am not afraid to travel overseas all alone and I work in a call center. That seems to make things a little easier for meeting new people but still how to start things out is always an issue for me.



thatsrobrageous
Deinonychus
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Joined: 22 Jan 2012
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 351
Location: Cohoes, NY

06 Nov 2015, 10:21 pm

I had trouble several times before I met my boyfriend. Meeting people online is typically a hit or miss. Mostly a miss for me at the time. I think listing my diagnosis on my profile or telling then was possibly a reason I had misses. But I never absolutely gave a f**k. I just went with it and I found someone who loves me anyway. We have been together since July 2015, dating since June. Otherwise, everyone has different luck. So yes, I had a lot of trouble, both in person and online.



C2V
Veteran
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Joined: 7 Apr 2015
Posts: 2,666

09 Dec 2015, 10:23 pm

I've been curious about this. A gay male acquaintance recently brought it up saying he and another guy had been chatting on some dating site, and the guy had asked him to meet for coffee. He had agreed then got all freaked out and logged off. I have other things to do right now besides complicate my life with a partner, and until recently was blissfully unaware that I could still be considered attractive by anyone for any reason, but you have to wonder how you'd handle this theoretically. Romance comes into it, presumably, unless it's explicitly a hookup? You hardly need a dating site for that.
I'd be awful, I imagine. Set it out like a contract with nothing left to mystery, game playing, or imagination.
To the OP - did you try it? How did it go?


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infidel7
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

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Joined: 4 Feb 2008
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 42
Location: Boston

24 Jan 2016, 3:44 pm

I start with paying a compliment- and make sure it's something I really mean. After that I'm lost, but sometimes I can fake it till I make it.
Feeling "romance" for someone I haven't gotten to know seems suspect to me. And so I generally like to hook up & talk a little, hook up again and talk a lot afterwards, if that goes well do that again, THEN go on a "date". I know it's backwards from social norms but I'm a gay aspie; I'm trying to make the world work for me, not the other way 'round!


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