Non-Binary?

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I identify as gender neutral (neutrois) and I've heard that gender issues and autism can go hand in hand a lot of the time. Anyone else?

GQ here, I'm actually highly disappointed at the fact that this website only has 2 gender labels for male and female and that you actually HAVE to choose 1 or else you can't register.

I'm agender.

Agender here. I've heard it an autistic thing too? I'm not sure why it is, though.

Really? There's many people out there who are non binary though. How does that become associated with autism?

I'm Genderfluid!

I'm a demigirl (I think), partly female and partly agender. I have a lot of social dysphoria and a little physical dysphoria, but my fear of change prevents me from doing anything about it.

Agreed!

Well, there aren't any studies on this subject, but it's evident that gender stuff (trans, queer, non binary etc)has a link to autism, because a much larger percentage of people on the autism spectrum have gender stuff than of people in general. Because there's been no studies, no-one seems to know why. But a theory that I've heard many times in the autistic trans/queer community is that it's because we autistics don't care so much about social rules, so we don't make playing with gender/feeling uncomfortable with gender, such a big taboo in our minds. Oh and I identify as queer.

I identify as non-binary as well. I can only speak to my personal experience, but a lot of my gender-figuring-out process has had to do with not feeling like I "get" all the invisible rules that seem to govern everybody's gender presentation, and not feeling like I should have to squish myself into one box or another. That feels related to my general lack of intuition when it comes to social rules, although of course there are plenty of allistic people who come to similar conclusions.

Seconding the note about choosing a gender when you sign up here-- not to mention having it displayed on all of your posts! I was surprised to see that.

I was chocked when I had to choose between two genders for this website (picked one at random mind you)!

I identify as non-binary queer. I've also heard about relationship between autism spectrum and non-binary. I guess in the end is it more probable that an autistic person identifies as something other than man or woman as the social pressure does not often become as profound. Gender is a spectrum, and if we were to think of a normal distribution, then the majority of the people would be somewhere in the middle But society dictates opposites, and that you have to choose either one or the other. Maybe we are all non-binary, just some people identify as man or woman

Really forced me into a bad spot I feel. I'm while I identify GQ I broke it down to a small pie chart. 20% female 15% male and 65% non-binary/agender. So while I feel 65% of the time that I am genderless I also claim both on other days. Because its only 65% it doesn't feel so accurate to blatantly say that I'm agender/non-binary.



Well I guess it goes to show how little people actually get diagnosed if its that much of a thing in the autism community. Then again we already know black and other people of color get diagnosed about 30% to 50% less then white folks anyway.



Its quite infuriating to say the least ...



So while on all this talk of non-binary, agender, bigender, etc, how many of you guys are out to your families about it? My folks are super religious and are anti gay, 2 gender only type of people so obviously with that being said after about 4 years of having known about this within myself I still haven't told them.

Surely it doesn't matter what you identify as - it doesn't change anything physically. You wouldn't turn up to a gynaecologist with male parts. You still use the male/female toilets. The defining body part is still there when you look in your underwear. Your human, and in the human world, you're either male or female, it's a matter of chromosomes.

If you're a marmorkrebs, komodo dragon, whiptail lizard, hammerhead shark, parasitic wasp, then fair enough; you're asexual physically, not imaginarily.

Sorry if I seem close minded or rude, but I just don't understand it. As far as sexual preference and transgender goes, fair enough, but identifying as something doesn't change anything. [insert "I identify as an Apache attack helicopter joke here]

I've got boobs and monthly period, so people see me as a woman (just to make the situation clear) and I married a woman. So my family and friends that care about me know that I am queer. I told some people about being genderfluid/genderqueer, and got very confused responses, so I stopped. If someone asks for pronouns, I am honest and say "zie/they". If someone says "you women can't be here or do that", I tend to say "how do you know I am a woman?".

Basically, I always felt I didn't really relate to the female gender, and I tried to force it upon me to be more "normal". When I found out there was such a thing as a gender spectrum, genderfluidy and even bigender, everything made sense to me. So now I got this inner confidence to wear and behave as I see fit for each day. Nothing changed physically, just internally.

I have nothing to hide, I never lived in a closet, I just am who I am. I mention my gender and sexuality when it is because of my lgbtq activism as it gets people to relate, it increases awareness and opens minds to new possibilities. If at work or uni people put me automatically in the "female" category, I tend to mention it. If people want to discuss it, sure go ahead, gender is a very interesting subject, and I have read up a lot about it. Try me, and I will break your binary world

Ask yourself how important is it for them to know that you are non-binary? If they already accept you as you are, behave and dress, then saying that you a non-binary is not so needed. What will change?

In my case, I haven't really told my dad, but he is super open about everything and also questions everything - we have AMAZING discussions. Of course he finds some of my very contemporary ideals "extreme", but that is mostly a generation issue. Recently we talked about the whole US craziness about bathrooms, and he mentioned about this guy in his gym that wears stereotypically female clothing and uses the man's bathroom. I asked him "Do you know if they want to be called him or she? Maybe you should ask. Either way, just because a man wears dresses doesn't make him a woman or trans. It's simply a guy that wears dresses. Maybe he is non-binary. I am non-binary - I don't really associate with being male or female. Gender is a spectrum, you can fall on anywhere. Society tells you to be one or the other." He agreed, we moved on to another topic.

Just giving my personal example because it doesn't have to be a big deal. But it really depends on you and what YOU want to achieve and feel.

Actually, biologists have already published an interesting paper in Nature that it is not chromosomes that define gender, and that gender is how you define it.

Yeah, you're right. But that's gender, not sex. I was talking about sex. Surely identifying as no sex, or a different sex, doesn't make it so - and that's what I mean. Anyone can swing from gender to gender, or neither, that's cool. But saying "I'm female" or "I'm neither male nor female" doesn't make it so physically. Sex is not a spectrum, although I agree gender is. This is where I struggle to understand "identifying". Again, sorry if I cause offence or if I'm ruining this thread.