Is it possible to become asexual?

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I used to be heterosexual and as much as I hate to admit it I even went through I slightly perverted phase in my early teens, although I never really thought that the act of sex sounded particularly appealing. In the last few months through I have noticed that my sex drive began to disappear, it wasn't a sudden transition but I keep noticing that I am caring progressively less about such things and at this point I looked up the definition of asexual and I think I fall under it now.

I don't necessarily want whatever is happening to be reversed, but I am kind of curious to know what's going on and if it would make sense to call myself asexual now. I'm quite confused about this.

You can't really, but you can lose your libido.
Did you get your hormones checked ? It might be an endocrine problem.

You've most likely always been asexual, but the hormones that act so strongly in adolescence may now be affecting you less. Plus there's peer pressure, usually to be heterosexual, or at least to have a sex drive of some kind - but now you're 18 you probably aren't as susceptible to that.

When I was your age, and throughout my twenties, I tended to identify as gay, although I was never convinced and had very little interest in sex, to the point where I avoided it. In those days, asexuality wasn't recognised as a sexual identity as it is now; but by the time I reached my mid-thirties (I'm now 58), it was clear that I was asexual. People who knew me when I was younger have also since said that they always assumed I was asexual, so apparently it was more obvious to others than it was to me.

I find being asexual very comfortable, although like a lot of things it might take you a while to get used to it.

@MissAlgernon

I have actually considered having my hormone levels checked to see if there are any problems with that, but I did have a blood test earlier this year which probably would have found that sort of thing if it were a problem. It was thorough enough to find that I have a few food sensitivities and that my platelet count is a bit high, so I would think that it would find any hormone imbalances although I'm not sure if they tested for that kind of thing specifically.


@Hyperborean

Yeah, that is definitely a possibility and a good point. I have always been the kind of person to look away when people kissed on TV and I always assumed that I was just too young to enjoy that sort of stuff, but I guess at this point I can't really say that. In retrospect I have always showed signs of it, although it didn't help that until recently I was part of a religion that was always like "getting married is the single most important thing you will ever do in your life" (Mormonism).

And your right, it is actually kind of nice to be free of that sort of stuff.

Thinking back on that blood test, they actually took some more blood to do more tests after they found that my platelet count was unusually high to make sure that it wasn't a sign of some condition and they found nothing. In that test I don't see why they would not test hormone levels.

Also, I told by brother that I am likely asexual and his response was "Yeah, I can see that".

Many anti-anxiety drugs, especially the SSRIs, can dampen/kill libido. As if that's a bad thing.

I've been thinking a lot about what Hyperborean said and I think he's right.

In addition to what I have previously mentioned:
I took an asexuality test and I scored rather high.
I took a Kinsey scale test which reported that I am asexual.
I've noticed that what I thought were crushes are actually very platonic in nature.
My dad also suspects that he is asexual, so there could be something genetic going on.

So yeah, looking back I've noticed a lot of asexual tendencies in myself so I've decided to start identifying as asexual. *takes a bite of cake*

EDIT: I took the asexuality test again but this time I answered as if it were a few years ago before my sex drive went from low to nonexistent and it still strongly indicated that I am asexual.

^

Yes, I've taken some of those tests too, and scored much the same as you. One of the difficulties that asexuals face is that we live in a highly sexualised society - you only have to look at the way advertising uses women and even children as sexual objects. So when we have romantic feelings for someone, our environment tells us that these must be sexually based, because that's the norm. Sexual motives can be so destructive.

Interesting that you use the word platonic. One of the best descriptions of asexual love is found in Plato's 'Symposium', particularly the speeches made by Pausanius and Phaedrus. Although it is mostly about love between men, it sums up asexuality's 'higher nature' very well. You might take a look, it's widely available.

Enjoy your cake.

You may find this lecture given in Pink Therapy's 2015 conference informative on the subject of Asexuality.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpojONQ ... 2RINLxMtXV

I believe that if you are asexual you are born asexual and after some sort of 'experimental stage' you finally come to realise you are asexual. I can still have romantic feelings for people and enjoy the feeling of companionship and closeness, but sex has never been my thing, it doesn't attract me to people.

Most people I know are like, 'I want a sexual relationship with that person' when they think about dating or being relationships whereas I don't see it like that. I want someone who is there, who has everything any other partner would have... but without the sex. The idea of sex makes me feel uncomfortable as I'm not attracted to people in that way.

I should point out that you can still have a drive and engage in sexual activity if you are asexual, but that doesn't suddenly make you sexual if you do engage in these activities.

I was in my mid 20s before I decided fully that I was asexual...

The pressure from peers to party, date and have sex as a teenager was certainly a factor which delayed this decision... so were the expectations from family members for me to start a family on my own...

Once I managed to put some distance to both groups it didn't take me long to realize that I had basically never had any real interest in sex and/or relationships...

The cake is a lie, BTW... Either that, or it tastes like despair...

Thanks for the replies.

Lately I have also been questioning my romantic orientation and I am pretty sure that I fall under aromantic. I am still a bit confused about the difference between romantic attraction and platonic attraction, so the jury is still out on that one.

and all things in this department will shift and change over time, so it's healthy for everyone to occasionally look inside and not take the category you had 5 years ago as a given today.

I think I've always been asexual/aromantic (ugh I don't like putting those labels to myself, but best way to describe),
especially since I never understood "crushes" and would really experiment to try and fit in with other girls. Lol good times (not). But since 5th grade I loved watching porn and got into some weird fetish stuff real quickly. Similar, I went through a perverted stage. I tried a lot of things sexually (on my own) but much was either painful or really had me questioning WHY. It got to a point where I really questioned what the f**k was wrong with me, and I didn't even consider I was asexual, but I didn't know what the hell to categorize myself as. I do have one particular fetish I would rather not discuss, but it turns out I just liked watching weird stuff for the sake of watching weird stuff. I'm still don't find myself attracted to people in that kind of way or desire and kind of romantic or sexual relationship, whatever that is.
But in turn, all that crap made me really open to anything sexually. I really cannot judge anyone based on their kinks. And I'm a porn artist so I am willing to accept anything as long as I'm comfortable drawing it in terms of ability.
Barely missed the point in the topic, basically I thought I became asexual after maybe experiencing depression or growing up or something, but nah I looked back and I was always this way. I just tried a bunch of weird stuff and didn't find anything new. I think sexuality can be fluid. I'm not gonna lie. But also not always. It's so complex that that's why I don't think a single label can really identify a person's entire life of sexuality. There are a lot of things that can affect your sexuality. you could be asexual, you could be experiencing something else. I think it will become more apparent as you age and reflect on your life in terms of sexuality. But who am I to talk, I'm only in my early 20's haha. Take what I say with a grain of salt, I don't know much of what I'm talking about (obligatory disclaimer).