How can I develop more feminine traits (as a guy)?

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How can a guy like me adopt more "feminine" traits? As a guy, I want to be able to be as feminine as possible. I already have something which I know can be considered feminine-ish. I wear one of those thong underwears made for men (I know no other guys talk about underwear that way), and while I think it's sexy, I sometimes lack confidence in my body. I was also looking into growing my hair into a "man-bun" or something like that.

How can I develop more feminine traits as a guy and gain some confidence?

Come on over and do the dishes for me. Then vacuum the carpet in the hallway and living room. Oh, and the laundry needs doing. While it's in the dryer, you'll have just enough time to run out to the store and pick up something you can cook for dinner. Don't spend too much, I'm not made of money you know. ... Meanwhile, I'm gonna sit back on the couch and watch an old episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Just make sure the vacuum isn't too loud, okay? And can you get me a bowl of potato chips and a glass of iced tea while you're at it?

(Okay, so I'm not guaranteeing the "gaining confidence" part ... )

...

Phoenix, I hope this thread didn't offend you.

Oh goodness, K_Kelly,

No, you didn't offend me.

I was just being a smart alec is all.

Wondering why in the world a guy would want to develop feminine traits?

I also hope my previous post didn't offend you.

~~ the phoenix

What Phoenix has portrayed is some irritating things that guys do to women.

All this was especially prevalent in the 1950s and 1960s. She forgot to have the "guy" request that the women "fix (him} a drink."

Why?

I don't think you really can.

I'm a gay guy, but very masculine. Most people just assume I'm straight.

I have a lot of gay friends I've met in the last couple years. Some of them are a bit effeminate, some of them a bit more, some of them very much so... but all of them are just as they are, naturally and innately as masculine or feminine as they simply are. For some it's further expressed by the way they dress.. but their voice, mannerisms, general style - it is what it is for each of them, for me, and for you. IMO

to strictly answer this question, i will say that the effeminate people [including myself] that i've known/know, have at least some of these basic traits in common-
*general non-conformism
*soft and/or flamboyant body language
*preference for stereotypically feminine colors and patterns
*long and/or unconventional [for men] hair styles/clothing preference/adornments
*emotional interrelational style over logical
*avoidance of violent entertainments, preference for storyline over action
*more of a sing-song speaking style with wider range/quicker alternation between high and low notes
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you can pick and choose the ones you like from the above list. i wish you well.

You could try makeup. But very, very subtle, very light makeup, unless you're going for a drag queen look.

I would suggest viewing women as people instead of a piece of meat with a pulse.

Aye.

To some degree this is true, though it does depend on what you're after exactly.


If it's down to appearance, it does seem that you need certain innate physical traits to pull it off. I'm able to do it, but it's because my face and body shape are suited to it; as it is I get mistaken for a girl every now and then when NOT trying. For someone whose body/face is just naturally quite masculine in appearance, it'll just look very strange to many people no matter how good the outfit/makeup/whatever.


If it's about personality, that's a whole other thing. Depending on the person you might be able to "act", and change people's perception of what your personality is like. Some people are good at doing that, others are not. I myself cant really do that; I come off as abrasive/angry and sarcastic no matter what. My personality is too forceful/fiery to hide and I sure am not an actor. But some people are really good at that. Maybe you could be good at it.


If it's more about simply FEELING feminine, well... that one, you can only answer yourself. Nobody can really define what it means to you, other than you. Try out different things, and see what you think of each. No harm in experimenting, eh? Find what suits you personally and go for it.

There's that. There's also nail polish and leg shaving. There may be other things...

I'm going to be honest (meaning someone is going to feel offended, or the need to remind me of exceptions which I'm aware of, or both). I notice that many males (meaning those assigned male at birth, and who were raised male), when attempting to be feminine, one of the first things they fixate on is female undergarments, and I tend to perceive that as a manifestation of masculinity itself, or concepts of femininity from a masculine perception, and often manifestion of autogynephilia (I'm not saying it is in your case).

If you were to poll cis gendered females on what they consider femininity to be, underwear probably wouldn't come up.

In my house, with my mother and two sisters, underwear only came up on the following occasions.
1. It was too itchy for me.
2. Someone left their underwear on the dryer.
3. Someone can't find their underwear (because they left it on the dryer).
4. A g string must be utilized with x pants or dress to avoid a "panty line".
5. I have (according to my sister) committed a horrible fashion faux pas because my underwear covers my midrif and this is visible when I raise my arms and my shirt comes up.

So if femininity isn't underwear, what is it? That's actually difficult to answer, but if you are transgendered and are trying to pass as female, I would focus on the following.

1. Voice: This is very important and there are techniques to bring your voice into the female range.
2. Mannerisms: Females tend to use more microexpressions and hand gestures, but are more spatially constrained at the same time.
3. Attitude: Females bare the burden of being expected to be warm, friendly, and less aggressive than males. Some male to female transexuals do not try hard enough for this. They are overly confrontational and come across as female impersonators or very low class women. Others try too hard and come across as caricatures of females. My advice is, be relaxed, but not "chilled".

My advice is just do what makes you comfortable!
You can even train your voice into a feminine voice, there are
some great videos on it on youtube, if that would make you more comfy! ^.^

While this may not be healthy been really thin is more of a girl than a guy thing. Go on a diet to get a super thin waistline.

And, if you want to cross dress, there are plenty of clothes for thin women available 2nd hand in really good condition.

It took a long time for me to be understanding of people born male who wanted to be more feminine, because it's the opposite of how I feel. I'm female, but gravitate to a balance between male and female. I felt very constricted into the stereotypical "female" ideas, and so when I saw a male going towards those things, I looked down upon it.

But how stupid! You're purely trying to gain in your life the same things I've been trying to gain--we're just going in different directions. That said, I think people who are pushing back in what you're asking in this thread, are being very unhelpful.

I think a good place to start might be on Youtube. Look up trans woman, or non binary woman, and you can look through what you might want, and what you might not want. It'd be a good way to get some ideas. If you wanted to do makeup, there are a lot of youtube videos out there that can help that trans woman have done.

If you're interested in clothing, that's always a bit harder. I know from when I shop for mens underwear, I always get looks. Maybe try a thrift store? You can get a bunch of different stuff for cheap, and then decide what you like more.

The way to get a more feminine body is mostly going to be in hormone therapy. I don't know how far you're going to want to go in that direction, but that's where it pretty much leads. A good start is with feminine clothing, growing your nails out, makeup, and maybe stuffing a bra if you feel so inclined.

There is a lot of support for this stuff online. You maybe don't feel trans--and that's not what you're looking for. But they might be able to give you some good ideas for what you are looking for. Hope that helps!