Can other FTM (or otherwise AFAB and trans) people relate?

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So. I'm a transgender man, I officially began my medical and social transition at 18 but I've known that I was transgender since middle school.
Like a lot of AFAB people (people assigned female at birth), my ASD symptoms were largely overlooked; while I was diagnosed as having anxiety, my more "autistic" traits weren't acknowledged, or were just written off as personality quirks or being the "weird girl".
A lot of research has been done on how autism presents itself differently in men and women (specifically, cis men and women) and how this leads girls with autism to be underdiagnosed both because of their symptomatic differences and their ability to more effectively "mask" their autistic traits.
Reading about the experiences of girls and women growing up on the spectrum and being overlooked, I find myself relating to them. My experiences were, more or less the same. But at the same time, the fact that I do not consider myself a woman makes me feel disconnected from them, and even a bit invalidated. Obviously that is in no way what these people intend, its just worry on my part. But I still find it difficult to discuss my experience growing up autistic, because I feel like I have to reconcile with the fact that, in this sense, it's like I am female.
I'm sorry if this reads as completely incoherent. Bottom line, other AFAB transgender people, do you also think about how your experiences maybe being overlooked as being autistic because you were """"female"""" are dissonant with the fact that you know full well that you aren't actually a woman at all?

Interesting post,I can't really help you,I lack the requisite knowledge.Talk to Bradleigh,they are the resident expert on trans issues,Bradleigh could point you in the right direction.I personally don't know any FTM trans that post frequently on this site.

Best wishes

I'm FTM trans and think I was overlooked both times I was assessed since I'm physically female (and partly because I attempt to camouflage so much, which could also be due to being female). I seem to have a mixture of both female and male "autism traits", but I would say I actually have more male traits and developed similarly to how male children do in general. Me and my brother even have quite similar symptoms, but he got diagnosed in elementary school, while the last time I got assessed I was told (after they said it was likely I had ASD) that they decided that my ADHD "prevented me from paying attention to socialization" and that I had "picked up autistic behaviours from my brother".

Regarding the female traits of autism that I have, thinking about them does make me insecure from time to time, especially since I've been overlooked while being assessed twice. While I have more male traits, and as I get older have increasingly noticeable issues in certain areas, it seems like people just focus on the fact I'm female and the few female traits I have, and that they always use my ADHD to write me off as just weird and not trying hard enough socially. It can feel like I'm not being taken seriously regarding both my gender and my autism, which can be frustrating.

I am no expert, just recently vocal in regards to pro trans activism and against anti-trans stuff. I am also AMAB non-binary, so I don't know how much help I can be on this subject and don't want to talk over anyone on this site.

All I know is that socialisation that "girls" are generally forced into often covers up ASD traits, that doctors are less likely to give a diagnosis. I don't know if it is the socialisation they get from other girls that makes the difference, or different standards between genders, where you see that mention of masking traits.

Oh ok I understand.