How can I stop being a music snob?

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Well no way to stop in your head, but when around others if you don't have something nice to say about their music don't say it unless you want to be perceived as a music snob. IDK there is music I hate and if someone really wants to know why then I will tell them. I certainly try and tolerate other peoples music if I am somewhere hanging out and people are playing music...but yeah too much of music is too much of music I hate. If I go into a bar/club type place and they are playing country, popular hip hop/rap(there is some I like but not much), pop music or upbeat EDM than I probably wont stick around. But to each their own why should I hang out in there being miserable about the crappy music and bring bad vibes to people enjoying it? I can just go somewhere more to my taste.

Sounds like you rely on pop music as an engine to make friends. That because you have no social skills.

That's probably the real issue.

Don't do that. Rely on music that way. Get some social skills.


But since were on the subject...make up your mind! Either be fake and pretend to like what folks your age play at parties so you can make friends. Or be true to self and don't pretend to like it. Find some other way to become popular at parties.

Absolutely. Different strokes (music) for different folks. Live and let listen.

I have noticed that people who have had a lot of musical education tend to be more attracted to classical music, though there are plenty who like it without this background. Why liking it should be regarded as snobbery just seems stupid to me, unless you combine your liking for it with a tendency to put down others for liking other kinds of music (but that is more intolerance for others' differences than snobbery).

As an AS person I particularly like the way that my favourite classicals can express the emotions that I am not so good at expressing myself, and can lead me deeper into the experience of those feelings. For anyone with alexithymia, this is an added bonus as a lover of classical.

That's a great point. I'm not a huge fan of classical, though I like some, but I have often found that the right piece of music can lead me to insights when I'm struggling to understand or express my emotions. My musical instruments are among my best "therapists" too.

Not exactly that. I don’t stand around talking to NTs about pop music. I just think that part of how NTs bond is enjoying a moment together. Dancing to pop music could be one of those ideas. If I’m being an annoying music snob that makes it hard for me to enjoy dancing to pop music. I’m thinking I should just pretend to enjoy myself so the NTs feel like they’re enjoying a moment with me. I just don’t want to be a debbie downer who brings down the atmosphere.

If you have any intellectual ambition whatsoever, someone will deem you a snob.

I second this.

But I can relate to the OP"s concerns to a large extent. When I was in my teens, I was terribly fussy and snobby about music - listening mainly to jazz and classical, and finding it difficult to enjoy much 'pop' music at all dated from later than the 1960s (except for a handful of prog artists...I know, right?). It was a serious barrier to relating to the music tastes of my peers - which was something I felt very keenly, as music has always been one of my key 'special interests' and I yearnt for friends with whom I could share it.

Latterly I grew out of that stage and started to enjoy a wider range of music - including things that were much more contemporary. I don't know for certain what prompted that; I guess I gradually found it much more fulfilling simply to focus on the way that music moved me and made me feel, rather than being guided by my inner history student to constantly overanalyse the development/background/structure of the media I consumed. Naturally my listening choices came to reflect that more and more over time.

But OP, if you genuinely don't enjoy contemporary music, I would say it's not worth trying to force yourself. Interactions based on your genuine passions will always be richer and more satisfying. If possible, I'd say seek out a forum, discussion group or music club/open mic night geared towards the kind of music you most enjoy; that's how I came to meet and befriend people with similar tastes.