"friend"--long period of time with no contact

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I met a very nice man who claims to have AS on an online dating site. We've emailed for a few months and have seen each other several times. I'm pretty sure that I want to be more serious, and I think there's a good possibility he would like that too. The problem is that there are times when he goes a week or longer without communicating with me (like right now). I don't know if that is lack of interest or being stressed out or forgetting that it's his turn to contact me or not realizing how important it is for me to hear from him frequently. Does anyone have any advice about this? Thanks!

Do you yourself have AS?

Some AS people tend to be hermit like. I've gone a long time (weeks) w/o speaking to my friends.

Ask him. Aspies are generally honest.

Yes I would contact him and ask him. Personally speaking 1-2 week early on is about right for me, I don't think you need to over keg it. How often would yo like to be in contact?

Thanks for the responses.

We're both around 30 and both wanting to have a family someday, so I would hope we would start talking every day or two and see each other at least once a week. I'm hoping to have such a conversation the next time I see him. I'd rather know now than waste my time and let my feelings grow deeper before getting hurt.

I don't really think I have AS. I hadn't heard of it until about the time I met him, but I can definitely relate to a lot of what I read here, especially the need for alone time and anxiety about dating.

[quote="Felicia"]Thanks for the responses.
I have both a femaile friend with AS traits and a male friend with AS traits.
Both like me a lot, I know that.
It is a friendship not a romantic relationship
Both are unable to answer any of my emails at all and both almost never call me.
I call them sometimes and they talk to me about their life very nicely.

Umm... just to warn you, I'm relatively mild but i still couldn't cope with talking to someone on the phone every day or even every other day. I only actually have five numbers on my phone, of which one is my own and one is my mother's. Sometimes I won't feel able to see any friends for a period of several weeks.

However, I am careful to make sure my friends know the reasons for this so that they can understand and are not hurt. Maybe you too could have an agreement that if he feels he cannot cope with being in contact with people he informs you of this? So at least you don't worry about why it is.

Thanks, Sarah.

That sounds like good advice. He wrote on his blog today, so I know he's alive, but I still can't figure out why he hasn't wanted to communicate with me for almost 2 weeks.