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nayashi
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05 Jan 2005, 7:51 pm

yep, stiiiiill paranoid


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Last edited by nayashi on 15 Jan 2005, 5:53 pm, edited 1 time in total.

letsGoBlues
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05 Jan 2005, 10:14 pm

nayashi wrote:
okay, so there's this guy i like, and he likes me. he doesn't know i have AS (well, technically, neither do i, but i discussed it with my therapist and she said that it is highly likely that i have it). but i don't know...he's said so many things to me that make me so extremely happy i can't stand it. but all the sudden i want to cry, and i just want to stop talking to him. he didn't do anything wrong, and i just don't want to talk to anyone right now, especially him.

i don't want to push him away, and i know that's what i'm doing. he's in japan right now, but we're seeing each other on my birthday (total fluke), which isn't until April.

he got really mad at himself when he started flirting with me because he told me that i was more special than that (god that made me happy). but i'm so afraid he's going to be disappointed. i really do. he thinks i'm going to change him for the better, but i'm such a mess.

i don't want to lose him. he makes me so happy i can't stand it, but why don't i want to talk to him all the sudden? this is so awful. i feel so awful.

is this normal for aspies, or am i just a freak all on my own?

and i want to tell him i have AS, but i don't know. i don't want to sound like i'm looking for sympathy.

i'm such a mess.


Dont feel bad. Im in a mess too right now.


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hale_bopp
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05 Jan 2005, 10:35 pm

my advice for anyone that isn't ready to deal with hurt.. is don't get into a relationship.

I've just learnt that lesson.



vetivert
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06 Jan 2005, 2:36 am

nayashi - i think this is absolutely (and horribly) normal when you have strong feelings for someone. everyone i know who's gone through anything like this describes similar feelings, whether aspie, NT or, probably, Martian (i know some strange people... thank the gods)

i wouldn't tell him about your AS just yet - wait until you feel a bit more confident in yourself about it. i'm all for telling people everything straight away, but a friend once told me that, if they get to know you as YOU first, they can take these little "foibles" (*cough*) as part of you and maybe not be too uncomfortable with them.

keep talking here - we've got three months to sort it out!



KtMcS
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08 Jan 2005, 3:35 pm

I've found that the moment I realise I like a guy, I can nolonger approach him or start a conversation and act all quiet when he's around...no wonder they dont think Im interested!
This guy sounds really nice. Vetivert is right- keep talking through your feelings here and when you see him again, you'll be more prepared.


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Astro
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08 Jan 2005, 6:08 pm

Quote:
I've found that the moment I realise I like a guy, I can nolonger approach him or start a conversation and act all quiet when he's around...no wonder they dont think Im interested!


been there, done that (but for girls). For me it was fear of rejection. Of course, at the time I didn't realize that this behavior actually assured my rejection...