Dating others with mental disabilities.

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I believe it best for me to have a spouse with similar disabilities as I. Thats the only way I can find someone who truly understands me for my quirks and how I thinks. I think that person would best tolerate me.

I believe it best for me to have a spouse with similar disabilities as I. Thats the only way I can find someone who truly understands me for my quirks and how I thinks. I think that person would best tolerate me.

I believe it best for me to have a spouse with similar disabilities as I. Thats the only way I can find someone who truly understands me for my quirks and how I thinks. I think that person would best tolerate me.

Well, not the only way, but I believe it makes things significantly easier. Triple post much?

The best and worst times of my life were with a girl that would be considered "highly afflicted" something or other relating to non existent psychiatric conditions.

this is catagorically unttrue. mental distress is caused by a wide variety of factors none of wich is an imbalance of nuetransmitters. only people in countries with big pharma influence believe this. Psychiatry's own internal papers even say so.
_Wall Street Journal_ 11/18/05

_United Press International_ 11/10/05

_WebMD_ 11/7/05

_Time Magazine Pacific_ 11/21/05


although introduction of additonal nuerotransmitters can amerolate mental distress.
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I would like to find a girl who has bipolar expeirences. My best friend becomes manic from time to time and those times are the most fun to hang around him.

My boyfriend has AS and I am prone to anxiety. I'm in therapy learning how to deal with my emotions.

It's funny...because I'm very in touch and feel my emotions very strongly, whereas my boyfriend has trouble pinpointing what he's feeling at times. I think we balance each other out, to be honest.

I can't see him ever dating someone who had less experience and understanding with "mental illness" of their own. It seems like it would be difficult for them to grasp that it's not something he consciously does - he's just wired differently

I have both HFA and bipolar, I have dated 'normal' guys, some bipolar guys, the normal ones have had issues similiar to mine must be something that attracted to me. I am good friends with the bipolar guy I dated, he was very severe and disabled by it. I am controlled with medication, work and pretty much have a normal life or try to. I am coutious of co-dependency which could be an issue. On both occassions when I dated guys with mental health problems it took away the pressure of explaining my issues and why I take so many pills but they were never 'real' relationships more kind of kid stuff I missed the intimacy. I also felt that there moods rubbed off on me, being around someone who is manic can edge me into a hypo state get me into activities against my own routine and control of my condition for example staying out late every night, drinking taking drugs so on. Then my ex bf who was 'normal' both his parents were depressive/bipolar and were rocks for each other from what he said there was a lot of love there. Finally I would say person first diagnosis second.

My girlfriend has scitzophrania (sp), but the thing is -- she likes me because I am awkward and weird. I think I was blessed, LoL... and I like her because she looks at things differently -- she is very spiritual. We also act the same in a few ways -- I often wonder if there is some sort of undiscovered mental illness we might both have. I dunno, I also find that I tend to find myself dating and liking girls with mental illnesses, hmmm... I think a lot of people do.

I don't think I would want to date someone lower functioning then me because i would feel like im taking advantage of them or something

I much prefer omeone the same as me so we are both on the same page an challenge each other

I'm usually not attracted to someone lower functioning then me or disabled

Hello you guys, how are you?, I'm back again, been on holiday (talking to myselves there, LOL).

Like attracts Like, ergo (so-called) Weird will attract (so-called) Weird, including us Aspies. That provides the compatibility of functionality which, when mixed with a good level of Chemistry, will prove to be a good, lasting match.

The problems come when a new partner PRETENDS to be Like to your Like because they are attracted to other less vital, but too their current taste, qualities and so don't want to lose you and how you (as perceived by them) make them feel, especially via your own decision ("Rejection...aaaagh!"). I.e. they lack self-knowledge of just which qualities are important to them in context of a relationship. You soon find out they're not...and then it all ends in tears. Or - if the chemistry is very strong - it will all CONTINUE in tears....and shouting and screaming and door-slamming...until one of you says 'Aaaaaaagh!...I can't take it any more'. Then he or she is declared the Lightweight :-[)

Uncharacteristically brief for me, I know, but - tough! ;-p xoxo (..."bzzz-bzzzz-bzzzz...")

PS: Here - I've been away so long I can't even remember what my boardname is. Can someone remind me, please? (Or I guess I'll find out as soon as this hits the board) (note to self - duu-uu-uuuuh!).

This is true and though there's a lesser chance in it actually being expressed(iunless the father or both parents have the "syndrome"), and due to the fact that it is carried on a recessive allele the child will still be born with it. it just may not necessarily manifest itself over the child's life.

The only good talks I have ever had with NTs are girls much younger then my age, otherwise I think talking to girls my age would be hard because one, I look young for my age and two, by the time i finish college, most of my friends are going to move in with their boyfriends/girlfriends or get married, so I tend to get things done more later then others. But for someone with AS, I have a strong social IQ and awareness about things, I don't talk that much when I go to school, sometimes I now and then get pissed off about things, but this is not my point. My point is, I have no interest in girls who are similiar to me. Last time I saw an AS type of girl trying to hit on me, I was like thinking in my head "ewww get away." My point is that I am only interested in down to earth, good natured, mature, NT types.

Looking back on my dating experiences...I think everyone I've dated had a personality disorder The first one, I don't know if he would fit into any certain category but he was more than just eccentric. Another thinks he's bipolar and is almost certainly ADHD. A third was actually diagnosed with bipolar, but I am certain he was AS. I didn't see any bipolar characteristics in him. I got along best with the suspected aspie.

It's really irrelevant to me whether someone I'm dating has some sort of personality disorder or not, I just want to get along with them and all. Sometimes I think I would do well with an aspie, but other times I don't. As for the kids issue...I've always known I want to adopt if I have kids.

I have a lot of mental & some psychical disabilities. I went true a major psychotic depression years ago & I was diagnosed with lots of seemingly contradictory disorders instead of AS thou I am certain I have AS & the docs wer quacks. When I was going true my rough period I did not have anyone to turn to so I had to deal with a lot of stuff on my own. I also researched mental disorders a lot & I also joined a bipolar support group for a while. I am in NO way an expert here but I tend to think that lots of people who have mental disorders have problems because society labels em as having some kind of disorder that needs to be fixed. The stigma of having a mental disorder can be just as bad or worse than the disorder itself sometimes. I think lots of Aspies can relate to the feelings of not fitting in & not being accepted that people with mental disorders tend to go true.

The only relationship I had years ago was with a girl who had sever ADHD, dyslexia, a little bit of OCD & she was also a borderline anorexic who burned herself & had some issues with drugs & alcohol. I had been diagnosed with dyslexia & ADHD sense I started school & I had lots of problems with school/learning, paying attention, & I had major self-esteem & OCD & other issues myself. She was going true some major problems in the beginning & I was as well cuz I felt like a total loser an outcast & I was extremely angry about everything. I was able to really connect with her much much better than I've been able to connect with anyone & she was there for me during a time when I really needed someone. I was able to help her with her issues some & seeing the positive effect I had on her helped me realize that I was not the complete screw-up worthless loser I felt I was before her. The relationship fell apart because she fell back into drugs & alcohol & I was having anxiety attacks worrying about her & I had a break-down after we broke up.

My point is thou that she had lots of mental issues & we connected so well that if we had been adopted; I would of thought we could of been brother & sister. I think I can get along really well with some people who have serious mental disorders & major emotional problems because I've did it with her & after I had that break-down I joined some online support groups in addition to that offline bipolar group & I found I can be fairly good at helping others sometimes. I really like analyzing things & listening to others & I also like to talk about my past & the lessons I've learned from things. I think most normal NT woman would find me to dependent, to negative, to depressed, to needy, to clingy, to pessimistic in addition to thinking I have low self-esteem & that I have to many disabilities & other issues for em to give me half a chance. I personally am attracted to women who are dependent/codependent & who can be kind of sensitive/emotional & have depression & anxiety &/or other issues because I think they mite could be more accepting & sympathetic to my problems/issues & I also really like to help people like that when I can because I did not have anyone there for me when I was having problems & I think that if I did; things would of gone much better for me. A person with mental/emotional problems/issues is much more likely to make me feel helpful & needed instead of making me feel like I'm a burden to her. Feeling like a burden who's unwanted & unloved is partly why I have some of the issues I do have. I want to be with someone who is a better person with me instead of making me feel like I'm a horrible person