Do Aspies have the same sexual drive as NTs?

Post Reply New Topic

lol yeah. Me neither, its gonna be a while though haha

I have to say I have a pretty high sex drive (and with no-one to help relieve it , my only outlet is 'self-release').

I think my Aspie-ness may have contributed to what fetishes I have (not going to say them here as I'm not confortable with that out in the open) though, and I often don't feel very good about that.

There's an Adult forum you can discuss them in.

I have never had so many orgasms. I never have had many with penetrative sex. I thought what is happening.

Ya know, you can work on getting someone to help with release. It's amazing what you can find on Craigs List, there's someone for every fetish, both sides. Just be safe

Anyways, I hear ya with the AS and fetishes -- I can get quite obsessive with mine, much like any other hobby. Whatever particular proclivity I might have, it's like I get all obsessed and driven, and become some kind of instant expert. I have gigs and gigs of my favorite stuff, and still can't get enough, I just like collecting too much. Just don't let something like that get in the way of having a real relationship, and I would also caution about revealing it to anyone.

I don't want my first sexual experience to be without romantic feelings involved.

I don't mean to be rude, but that's maybe overly idealistic. Animals in the wild don't really have much romance -- Romance is sort of a human creation, and a somewhat modern one at that. And maybe a romance will bloom from your mutual fetish. Either way, it might take a lot of the performance anxiety and expectation out of sex and let you pursue a romance with less pressure. Just my 2 cents. I made the mistake of falling in love with my f-buddy, when I don't think I was really in love with her (or she with me), but we felt this expectation to feel like that, so we did. Looking back, we were just horny and had mutually compatible festishes (her for a white guy, me for an asian chick). We should have just had fun with that, instead of all the emotional turmoil.

Overall, I think that my libido is fairly normal. I tend to be more experimental than most. However, I sometimes lose interest in sex when I delve too deeply into an obsession.

The man I am involved with is horny 24/7, but he only needs actual physical sex about once a month. He always uses perverted remarks in his IM's but not so much in person.
He seems insecure about his performance but is actually an excellent lover and is concerned about pleasing me. I tell him all the time how much I enjoy him but it doesn't seem to put his mind at ease.

deleted post

Last edited by holden on 15 Feb 2009, 10:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I have no experience that is more than french kissing but there's still time.
I am quite sexual though and fantasize often.

That's not a sign of horny, that's just a sign of a dirty mind. Surely the entire cast of The Daily Show isn't horny 24/7...


Such insecurit about performance should actually be taken as a positive sign (for you, anyway)... it's a sign that he's concerned about how you feel... a man who is only interested in his own pleasure will not care... Yes, there are some confident men out there that care, but generally if he doesn't care, he won't worry...

I'm certain my sex drive is far above most NT men.
And at the same time I think my ability to understand socially accepted sexuality norms is far lower.
I'm lucky in that since my early twenties I've never struggled to get sex, but I've also never managed to understand my lusts for those I'm not 'with' either.
I can be with someone, and want someone else. And I find it almost impossible to block those feelings out. They're like very loud noises.
I know everyone has a roving eye to some degree, but none of the NT people I've spoken to seem to be as consumed by this as I can be.
It's like a need to experience, to discover; it's almost not even sexual. It's curiosity.
Anyone else understand this?

My sex drive is positively out of control--to the point where I have insomnia, am constantly in a state of bitterness and resentment towards humanity, and can't think or concentrate on ANYTHING but sex. It is literally as though I were high on something. I am outside of myself.

Is this influenced by my AS? I'm sure. Does this affect many other Aspies? I do not know.

Honestly I don't know why society can't come out and say that women NEED oral to climax. It is so obvious biologically speaking. But there is still an unwritten rule that it is "inferior" to intercourse. But as an Aspie, I am pretty much unaffected by unwritten rules.

I can very honestly say that I look forward to performing oral on my future wife more than any other aspect of sexuality.

Not quite sure. My sex drive seems to be less than that of most NT males in my area (who are total horn dogs). They get hot and horny just by looking at an attractive female while I could care less. It's like they have never seen any before, yet they are supposed to have had sex many times. Not that I don't have a sex drive, I just want to save it the right woman.

Let's just say that my sex drive is not as easily activated but once it is..........