Eligible Odd-Bods! - The Premier Aspergian Singles List

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Well..........I'm 45 now and never met the right Woman? Met a few wrong ones LOL

I'm from the Midlands in England, and was diagnosed as having ASD/AS in March 2007.

I had worked in various factories etc for about 20yrs, then diagnosed as having 'Anxiety & Social Phobia'........but having seen docu's etc on Tv I kinda knew I had 'Asperger Syndrome', as I could relate to MOST of the 'Traits'. Unfortunately, when I was at School it wasn't a recognised condition.

I was born & brought up in 'remote' countryside areas untill I was 16 (inc 3 moves), so I spent most of my life just thinking I was a 'Quiet/thoughtful, decent' person!! !

People tend to 'take advantage' of you if you are an 'outsider' and have a mind of your own.

I HAVE had 'Friends', but they tended to be 'users' or used me as a 'stepping-stone' etc

Anyway, at least I know I've looked after myself despite very little help etc...........and I dream/fantasise how Wonderful Life would be IF I ever found a Real Partner?

I enjoy Sport (mainly just watching thesedays) Soccer, Moto GP/Speedway, Tennis etc, Music (from Rock to Pop etc), Cinema, Animals/Nature, Humour/Philosophy, TV/DVD/Video, D.I.Y. (I have to) LOL. Daytrips etc especially North Wales...........and I'm very interested in Ufology & the Paranormal?

I'm not Materialistic, but DO Love little Luxuries etc, I'd Love to meet a similar Female for a 'relationship'..............failing that it would be nice to meet a Male or Female fairly locally for 'Friendship' etc

Are you Daive??

((This is an excerpt from my introduction post in the 'Getting to Know Each Other' forum, with a few additions and changes.))

On the one hand, at times, particularly around people I am comfortable with, when I'm speaking about something I'm knowledgeable on, or when I'm online and free from the restraints and insecurities of my own flesh and sluggish oral conversational skills, I can come off as extremely stand-offish and arrogant (I'm sure some of you are pissed off at me already) and at other times, particularly when I'm out of my element, I am very reserved, quiet, and seemingly shy (although in reality I simply do not have anything I think is worth saying.) However, I do have well thought out reasons for everything I do, reasons that I've recently found out most people neither get nor even need due to the fact that their behaviors come completely intuitively to them. As mentioned earlier, I am determined to the point of stubbornness and have strong standards towards fairness, justice, and respect, mainly because empathy does not come naturally to me, so I've developed a particular framework in my mind of how people should be treated unless they prove otherwise.

In the end, I may seem cold and callous at first, but I really do care deeply about helping and protecting people, and to anyone who bothers with the effort required to earn my trust and break through my seemingly hard exterior, I have a heart of gold and will do anything I can to make the people I care about happy. I can be very generous, kind and affectionate and really want nothing more than to find people who will get and accept me for who I am, who I develop deep and meaningful relationships with and who will treat me and desire my understanding and acceptance in the same way. If there's one thing I like just as much as talking about myself, it's hearing other people spill their own guts and trying to build an understanding of their lives and desires. While I may seem stubborn and inflexible at first, once you get to know me I can actually be somewhat of a pushover and will spoil you and lavish you with gifts and attention. (This is particularly true of romantic interests, which I only recently learned, but is also true to a slightly lesser extent of all good friends.)

I have a pretty goofy sense of humour; I find sophisticated humour to be the best, but I'm also into a lot of clichéd internet memes and otherwise really geeky stuff too. I'm extremely nerdy but also into working out, martial arts, and was captain of my rugby team in high school (slamming head on into other big guys and pushing and grunting in a scrum doesn't require a whole lot of physical coordination nor social skills), so I'm a pretty interesting hybrid of jock/nerd when it boils down to it, although my university years have seen me shift somewhat more towards the geeky side. In person I can be pretty quiet and introspective, somewhat of a Silent Bob type in that I rarely speak but when I do I often have something profound and possibly long-winded to say. Sometimes, however, I can actually be pretty silly and get on with a lot of completely uninhibited and slightly immature nonsense, particularly if I'm drunk or around people I'm very comfortable with.

I read a lot (as any good writer should); I'm particularly into writers like Neil Gaiman, Dan Brown, and Richard Knaak. I also play lots of video games, particularly RPGs (huge Final Fantasy fan) and real time strategies as well as all of the Blizzard games. I also like movies, particularly comedies and those with deep themes (The Dark Knight and the upcoming Watchmen come to mind), anime (particularly Dragonball Z; I've always loved the 'pure' nature of both its moral themes and its raw fighting style and the method by which its characters acquire their powers as well as the powers themselves.), hanging out with friends, (small, personal gatherings, not so much large social events) and although I do not feel empathy easily for people, I love animals and am intuitively kind towards them. I have no genre restrictions on the music I listen to; individual songs either simply strike me or they don't. However, as a general rule of thumb, I particularly like video game music, metal and other forms of hard rock as well as techno and Irish folk music, and for the most part absolutely detest most country music.

Physically, I'm about 5'10; 205 pounds; average/somewhat muscular build. I'm pretty pale, have dirty blonde hair and hazel eyes. I've been told I'm actually somewhat cute, particularly when a smile can be goaded out of me. I'm also very left handed/right brained, and have all the interesting mental capacities that come with that to a pretty noticeable extent. I don't have it yet but I plan to get a tattoo of the latin phrase "Quis Custodiet Ipsos Custodes?" running up my left arm in the coming weeks.


I'm the guy on the left; the one on the right who looks like a deer in the headlights is my younger brother.


In a nutshell: Calm and composed, the emotional always kept tightly in check by the logical, yet with a strong primal nature bubbling just underneath the surface that can easily take over when I really get into the swing of something, transforming me from calculating and hesitant into spontaneous and confident bordering on cockiness. However, I like to consider myself as somewhat more easygoing and fun (at least after I get past the initial phase of awkwardness) than a vulcan. In recent months I've adopted the philosophy of "I'll try anything twice." and I really will. I usually will stick to my guns, but I am open minded towards the suggestions and opinions of others and will carefully consider them. I'm always looking for interesting new experiences to engage in, and am very unpredictable to the extent that usually, my actions and intentions are very clear, but you never know when I'm going to suddenly diverge and do something unpredictable (usually when an idea builds to obsessive proportions in my head and I absolutely *have* to act on it), making those instances even more unexpected.

I guess that what I'm looking for is a girl with similar traits. (Tried the opposites attract route last time; check out my introduction in my blog to see how that went.) I appreciate someone who is strong, mature, introspective, and takes a bit of work to open up; someone who has a powerful spark of life and fun in them but who isn't willing to show it to just anybody right away. I'm pretty much the definition of a hopeless romantic; my idea of true love is having someone who you can teach life lessons to and who can teach you life lessons you'd never be able to learn otherwise as well as venturing into uncharted waters together. Still, just having someone to hold hands with is in itself a powerful thing as well. I'd love to be able to have someone who wants to share all their passions and ideals with me, who wants to make me happy yet at the same time also likes being taken care of, and most importantly makes me feel like I am needed and what I do for them is special.

Geographically, while closer would be ideal, I can't afford to let distance be that much of a factor for me as my little neck of the woods is pretty isolated from everybody, and I function much better with early relationship stages being online anyway. I also have so far managed to pay my way entirely through school without taking out any loans (I hate the notion of being dependent on anybody or owing people things) and have a decent sized savings to boot, so my travel prospects are pretty flexible, although I do not appreciate being taken advantage of.

If I had to describe myself in a single line, it would be this: I'm a Lone Wolf who's tired of being alone. Feel free to drop me a line if you want to talk; I've been told that I give off an air of daunting unapproachability, but I really am level headed, easy to talk to if you know what you want to say, and knowledgeable about a lot of things.

no kidding. thanks, now i know just where to find it.

I always repost, just in case... if you can e-mail me, I'm more likely to respond to that than a PM since my computer logs me out, but I don't know I'm logged out, so I never respond.

[email protected] by the way...

Gender: Female
Orientation: Bisexual
Location: Connecticut
I'm openly admitting that I'm not skinny or thin, but I look like I weigh about 180-190 lbs.
I love watching cartoons and stand up. I'm starting to get into comic books. I take Japanese. I'm going to be an East Asian Studies major.

Whether it be for friendship or a relationship, e-mail me if you are interested.

You've barely given it a day, Daive!