Anyone else not looking because you are sick of rejection?

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I have not dated in 17 years, me being 17 years old. Right now I'm not looking because:

1. Too shy to breathe in the presence of an attractive female. This has landed me in hospital not just once (zero times is not just once).
2. Just can't be bothered.

Give me a few years and this thread may, I mean WILL, apply to me.

well if i was a girl i would be scared of you. you seem too intense and "needing of acceptance".

i think a bit like a girl in some ways as i understand them more than men.

i think you come across as a lean and hungry wolf that is starved, and in the periphery of the world you are envious of.

girls do not like misunderstood men who are 41 i would think.
why have you been alone all that time? surely someone must have been attracted at some time.

i guess it is because you are not happy with your own identity and wish to absorb another persons identity.

if i were a girl, i would see you as a desperate man who falteringly tries to incur my sympathy with tales of rejection and i would not be interested.

if you are happy and jubilant about what you are thinking, others will want to know what you are thinking. you must think and be happy for your own ideas before you look like a sunny area that others are attracted to.

sorry again my words are from low hfa tonight.

Assumptions, assumptions.

Of course, saying 'nobody wants me' is also an assumption, as the person did not read the minds of everyone, but I'm pretty sure he knows more about his own life than any of the other posters here.

well .......nup. i have no idea of your sentiment.
it is quadruple dutch to me.

I know you find her attractive and so do I. It's supposed to be Tifa, a character from Final Fantasy 7. The japanese tend to try and find persons that look like characters from popular games or anime and take pictures of them. I have no idea who she actually is, though.

I find your philosophy to not be so enimatic

Heh, lawlz.
But actually, my screen name is based on a plot element in an RPG game concept that I'm working on.

Explanation: Nobody knows whether the OP had ever had anyone attracted to them, so do not act as though the OP has had anyone attracted to them.

The way the OP acts, I don't think he'll attract much of anything.

I challenge anyone to go through what I've been through and not feel the same way.

Too much rejection can hurt too much, and taking a break can be needed, but...

"Life is painful, Suffering is optional"

We desire something that has an intimate significance, hence the pain when that desire is unfulfilled or denied. But how we respond to rejection in the long term is more a product of our attitudes and beliefs than anything else.

I think it can be compared to a rollercoaster ride: the steep dives and corkscrews are like rejection, they can be scary (pain of rejection) and it's understandable that someone doesn't want to experience that again. but is that reason enough to avoid rollercoasters altogether?


...but if a change in cognitive / behavioural attitudes is not enough to overcome any suffering, there may be a deeper emotional scar that needs healing or treatment.


Disclosure: I have never been on a rollercoaster

Well you can only be used if you let yourself be used maybe you need to be more assertive of yourself and what you want from your relationship be upfront say i don't need anymore friends i need someone to love who will love me back do you know what i am saying?

I've been sick of rejection since I was 7 years old(long story), and it's a tough habit to break. Now I have trouble letting anyone get close enough to reject them/me. I don't think that means I'm not looking, but it is passively so. Although the odd are against my method, sometimes it works. Plus, when a girl comes after me, I know she is genuinally interested, and not just giving in to my advances.

I wish the whole dating game was....girl goes after guy. Wouldn't life be so much easier? There would be no second guessing, and guys wouldn't have to hit on numerous chicks to find one that responds. She would come after what she wants and that would be it, or at least a beginning. Only in a perfect world......

After a while you just start to lose hope, and slip into a forlorn kill yourself mode. I have never had a girl approach me, never understood why but they seem to avoid me like the plague. THAT'S rejection.

I am NT, 49 and I am no longer looking because I too love my space but the only man have have fallen in love with in years is 53, AS and says he only has time to see each other for about 2 hours about every other month. Honestly, I'm much happier seeing him every other month than to be with someone I have no interest in every week. I love that he's his own person and doesn't smother me. But I would really love to see him a little more frequently.